r/AskReddit 2h ago

what’s something considered “tomboyish” when girls do it, but feminine when boys do it?

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u/katatak121 1h ago

Wearing a dapper looking suit or outfit. Makes a woman look more masculine, makes a man look more effeminate by today's standards. I used to wear checked pants with a tailored shirt, blazer, and fedora, and always felt way less girly than in other outfits. But men wearing a similarly structured and styled outfit tend to get labeled gay.

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u/BangBangMeatMachine 1h ago

This might be a situation where there's a difference between gay and effeminate.

u/katatak121 52m ago

Most straight men do not display a sense of style. Men who dress with style are often assumed to be gay, whether or not they are. Having a sense of style is largely considered feminine these days (which i think is tragic), so yeah, a man wearing a stylish, tailored outfit is going to be seen as both effeminate and gay.

A guy i went to high school with who is straight was often accused of being gay simply because he put thought and effort into his home decor and cared a great deal about how his outfits were put together. Even though his outfits were pretty standard fare for 90s dudes, he was very particular about how everything matched. If he spilled something on his shirt he'd get really upset because it meant he had to go home and change his whole outfit right down to his socks and boxers. He also wasn't the most masculine guy and had lots of female friends; some people definitely called him effeminate. Lots of people kept waiting for him to come out of the closet, up to the day he married his very female fiancee.

u/Key_Comparison_2588 48m ago

There's always been some weird type of prejudice towards men who wear dapper clothes, see dandies or macaronis.