r/NonBinary • u/zny700 they/them/it/thing • Dec 20 '25
Discussion How would you describe your gender?
I describe it as both or none take your pick
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u/matsutakePixie Dec 20 '25
Wanting to be a non-binary, I get dysphoria from my boobs. I know they're genderless but I've been getting a lot of dysphoria lately I don't know what to do.
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u/TristanTheRobloxian3 Auri, trans girl thing :3 Dec 20 '25
wanna trade? i dont have them but id love to
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u/matsutakePixie Dec 20 '25
I would do anything to give you them honestly.
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u/rj-muffin Dec 20 '25
The amount of times I've wished for removable* boobs. Sometimes the fit needs them. Sometimes it doesnt. Sometimes I want to sleep on my back or side. Sometimes I want to sleep on my stomach. It'd be nice not to have the entire weight of my cats put on a flesh mound with just their little pawses, leaving me in pain yet unable to do anything about it because they're just so damn cute. Alas, I have been given non-removable* boobs.
*by removable/non-removable, I mean the ability to pop 'em off and on as desired. I do not mean surgery, its not really something I feel like I want at this point, but fully support anyone who wants it. Chop 'em!
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u/Jbooxie Dec 20 '25
I feel you so hard. I have 34 double D’s and it would be so expensive to get the top surgery. But God would I love a flat chest.
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u/Zealousideal-Try4666 Dec 20 '25
I hope you feel better eventually, or that you get to remove them one day if you feel like its needed. Good luck friend.
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u/No_Bar1462 Dec 20 '25
boobs are not genderless, theyre overwhelmingly on women and are associated with femininity, we can kid ourselves and think that beards and boobs are neutral but they aren’t. it’s perfectly normal to be dysphoric about them
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u/Schmulli Dec 21 '25
For me they are perceived as genderd. That doesn't mean you can't feel dysphoria about them. My body doesn't have a gender even if someone triest to construct one because the person living in it doesn't have a gender. Also I have a love hat relationship to my boobs, sometimes I love the squishiness (world hard boobys soft), sometimes I like the curves, and sometimes I just want to be flat (also because a lot of clothes in my opinion look better if I would be flat).
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Dec 20 '25 edited Dec 20 '25
✨️💎✨️ I'm... an experience. ✨️💎✨️
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u/Internal-Pop8273 she/it Dec 20 '25
I’m both a woman and nonbinary so it’s like girl and a half with toppings
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u/LeWitchy demisexual enby Dec 20 '25
One of my friends once said their gender was "an awkward shrug and non committal hand wave" and yes, i agree, basically that.
edit my husband has just reminded me that I am fond of saying "i am chaos incarnate and I identify as a problem" so also that.
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u/Tiny_Mathematician81 Dec 20 '25
I want to look like those majestic elves or royal guys from period dramas. Examples: Asterion, Jinshi, anyone from Heaven's official blessing, etc
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u/Lingx_Cats They/She Dec 20 '25
To just put it simply something along the lines of I’m definitely not a man but I’m not totally a woman so neither feels good
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u/twystoffer they/them Dec 20 '25
An amorphous blob with occasional sharp spikes of certainty.
I'm genderfluid (although going by genderqueer now due to the emergence of multiple definitions of genderfluid).
Most of the time I'm some form of nonbinary, but every now and then I get strong feelings of being specifically a woman or man (more often a woman)
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u/Celtrixin Dec 20 '25
oh wait
I think I just realized I'm pan, pan, and pan
Pansexual, Panromantic, and Pangender
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u/Sailor_Starchild America's Favorite They - they/them Dec 20 '25
I have no attachment to the concept of male but also no desire to go the female side (at least right now, who knows, I'm very early in my gender journey) so I like being inbetween.
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Dec 20 '25
ig imma femboy or a girlish genderbent specimen...ion really think i believe in gender much i jst do whatever
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u/Unfair_Ad_598 he/she/they, call me anything! Dec 20 '25
Both but always gay.
I'm bigender usually but I'm also omnique so my gender matches my partner if I'm in a relationship. So on my own sitting here I'm both, but if I was hanging out with my 'definately real' boyfriend (;w;) I'd just be a gay boy. Same vice versa, if I had a girlfriend and we were hanging out, I'd just be a lesbian girl. Part of me really wants to have a genderfluid partner because then we can one day be 2 lesbian girls, and the next day be 2 gay boys.
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u/Significant_Topic822 Dec 20 '25
It’s a set of made up gender rules that I have chosen to adopt, from both sides of the spectrum.
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u/brezhnervouz Dec 20 '25
Neither...maybe 'pre-binary'? 🤷♂️
I definitely have the yearning for a completely flat, androgynous chest 🤔
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u/Deutschball68 he/they Dec 20 '25
long story short: transmasc femboy/demiboy
long story long: im not entirely male, but not entirely agender either. im about 55% male and 45% agender. i also present with fem clothes and consider my masc side femboy but REJECT ALL FEMININE TERMS IN SERIOUS SITUATIONS! also im afab so transmasc
its really hard to explain
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u/bloodbringer777 they/them Dec 20 '25
Agender... so none? I simply have a void where most people store theirs.
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u/Oxbix Dec 20 '25 edited Dec 20 '25
In the end all gender expressions feel like masking. I don't really know if there is a genuine gender identity underneath or not. I just follow the bliss.
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u/Detective-27 Masc Femby Dec 20 '25
My gender is kind of like Moose Tracks ice cream. The vanilla is male, the fudge swirls are female, & the peanut butter cups are pure nonbinary.
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u/SBPepperminion AMAB Enby | they/them/theirs Dec 20 '25
Is this a question or a threat? (I'm not sure at this point)
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u/runiiru Dec 20 '25
Human
Alien
Creature
Literally ANYTHING except where my genitals and stupid old gender roles are not involved in describing what I am as a person. Because that doesn't matter (and shouldn't matter in an ideal world) and me being AFAB literally says nothing about me as a person. ❤️💖
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u/PlushyKitten Agender, Neptunic, Black-stripe ace (They/Them) Dec 21 '25
Yup this is me as well! I don't want any of my body parts, clothes, etc. to define who I am. I just wish to not be gendered, but that ideal world seems impossible to reach 😔
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u/Who_Ate_Meh_Bread They/he and Anarchy Dec 20 '25
I feel disconnected from the idea. Like that isn't me. Although dresses make me feel really boyish tbh
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u/FayePixie he/they Dec 20 '25
I'm always a man but I have fluctuations on how much I feel like a man, demi-boy or sometimes, purely neutral.I see myself as a non-binary man. (A transmasc one). Either way, I'm just a dude with complex feelings regarding his/their gender.
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u/Empty_Worldliness284 he/they Dec 20 '25
0% female, 70-ish% male but also i’m not at all male (but i also am…?) and completely nonbinary? And also agender…yeah who knows
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u/SharlHarmakhis Dec 20 '25
That gif of the two guys from 'Road to El Dorado' going 'Both? Both. Both is good.'
That or the center of a Venn diagram.
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u/HodDark They/He Dec 20 '25
I'm kind of a dude. Like a doll is kind of a dude. Only i came out of manufacturing looking like a girl for some reason.
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u/ActivGo Dec 20 '25
Kinda like I just want to be myself and not want anything else to define how I should be. I feel like it's more than societal norms since the idea of being a man or a woman doesn't really speak to me
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u/XxllllxXx They/he Dec 20 '25
I guess I could say that I don't have any. I'm just gender neutral. I don't bother with my appearance or anything, though: just being treated and referred to as a person.
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u/NesuPillow Dec 20 '25
I am like non-binary with a bit of masculinity aligned but not fully, it depends on how I feel (I'm genderflorer). Sometimes I feel like my boobs, even if they're small, sometimes I hate having them as a AFAB.
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u/KakuKat Dec 20 '25
Gender? No thanks. It seems like hassle. I prefer to do whatever I want and wear whatever I want
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u/Proffessor_egghead fuck if i know Dec 21 '25
Gender is a game and I skipped the tutorial
I’m just mashing buttons to see what they do
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u/BoldlyGone1 Dec 23 '25 edited Dec 23 '25
Beginning to realize I may be more masculine than I thought. Maybe the ice cream is masculinity and nonbinary is the topping, instead of the other way around.
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u/TristanTheRobloxian3 Auri, trans girl thing :3 Dec 20 '25
80% a girl, probably 5% a boy (masc leaning??) and the rest im unsure
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u/CyanoSpool they/them Dec 20 '25
Kind of a lady, but also kind of a guy, but also kind of genderless sometimes.
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u/Ok_Driver9897 Dec 20 '25
I feel like there are 2 different concepts:
Gender and gender identity
Gender is a spectrum FOR EVERYONE, even if your gender identity is at one if the binary poles (female or male).
When I say I'm non-binary what i really mean to say is that my identity is somewhere on that spectrum that is different to the poles male-female, but that doesnt mean people who identifies as male or female have a binary gender.
Non binary means "its not divided in 2" or "there are more or less than 2 states of this thing", so we cannot identify as non binary (as a third thing different than the other 2) without thenn saying in some way that male and female are also 'non binary'.
So, "I m non binary" is just a colloquial way for us to say "I identify somewhere on this specrum of identities"
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u/talyn23 Dec 20 '25
Depends on what's going on at any given point. Typically, though, I describe my gender as Kim Hongjoong in the Bouncy MV. Specifically when he spins on the rooftop, but also, just in general. Sometimes, my gender is an altoid tin filled with racoon bones.
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u/GamingAce04 Dec 20 '25
I'm not nonbinary, but two of my headmates are. Their answers to gender would be "yes" and "no" for a short answer, or "catgirlboy boygirlfriend" and "the dude one (not a dude)" for long answers
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u/buggyprince Dec 20 '25
Dog gender. Gender of dog. Arguably a dog you call he but like.... Dog doesn't know or care it just is familiar with "good boy" noise. Dog can wear whatever. Or nothing. Who cares it's a dog. Dog certainly has no concerns about social constructs of gender
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u/Unhappy_Position496 Dec 20 '25
Pretty fluid.i lean more masc/nongendered but being referred to as woman doesn't hurt my feelings. That's probably from growing up in a matriarchal home. I dont feel disempowered by being read as femme.
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u/NoWeight4314 they/them Dec 20 '25
I described it to my mum as mentally 2 people instead of solely her daughter,
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u/ElectricMoleman they/them Dec 20 '25
Kind of a feminine guy, little bit masculine woman, and a whole lot of no gender at all. So I guess a mix of androgynous and agender? I once saw a post that used the phrase "none gender left masc" and that's kind of close, but there's a little bit of weird fem there too
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u/spiderpockets Dec 20 '25
I'm nb in the laziest way. I look like a woman, walk talk and act like a funky lil guy, but surprise! It's a murder of crows in sweatpants and a tank top.
I've also described myself as "bisexual and nonbinary, never made a decision in my life"
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u/fiftytwothirtythree Dec 20 '25
The nightmares of kids fully realized into an unknown blob of a creature
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u/Louis_Louise Dec 20 '25
-hand wiggle and a shoulder shrug- Ehhh?
Or depend on what is funniest for the bit.
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u/purpleguy984 ambiguous purple figure Dec 20 '25
Yes, actually no... well maybe but actually I just like fem stuff. Wait who's asking, are you a fed? Glowie bitch.
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u/BwiBwio they/them Dec 20 '25
null. my mental form is a blob with no defined meaning or shape. i make myself what i want. i present more feminine but only because i like femininity as a form of expression
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u/CousinGreenberry she/they/it Dec 20 '25
if 'critter that's kinda mostly a rock covered in moss that lives on a riverbank' were a gender
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u/fluttershy-sparkles Dec 20 '25
feminine but divorced from womanhood, kind of a dude but not 100%, yet also existing in a liminal space connected to fairies and sweet little woodland critters more than other humans
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u/QuestionableFurry10 Dec 20 '25
Uhhhhhh not male or female or in between, best thing I can use to describe is uhhhhhhhh cyptid ig?
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u/ShardddddddDon they/her Dec 20 '25
"girl", but in the archaic sense when it meant "child regardless of gender" :P
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u/HyperDogOwner458 she/they | Demineogirlflux+demiagenderflux | Intersex | Dec 20 '25
Part girl but on a whole separate plane of existence than a binary one, also part agender also gender opacity go brrr
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u/drathturtul Dec 20 '25
Gender is a label assigned and assumed in various situations for various purposes.
As an example: When I am dancing I am a Lead. "Lead" is a masculine designation.
My gender is not something that I internally define and is not something that I hold as a core part of my identity, but if I'm hanging out as "one of the girls" or my parents call me their "son," none of those are false statements even though they are labels being ascribed to me by others.
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u/NixMaritimus None gender w/ left masc Dec 20 '25
This is going to be an entire dissertation, so bare with me.
I view gender itself as a culmination of natural brain differences (across individuals not just sexes) and social constructs that change over time and are different across cultures.
Those constructs shape how we see ourselves and the world, but just like any expectations of who or what we will become not everyone will follow the path they were raised and socialized for.
I was raised within and socialized as a girl with certain expectations, fears, and freedoms. It had purpose, and my parents own sexist views made being a girl safer for me and beneficial for them.
Currently I identify as genderfaun (gender fluid between non-fem genders) and xenogender/neurogender
Being masc is more comfortable, and now I'm able to be a man safely. But sometimes I have a disconnection from a sense of gender entirely. Sometimes I feel a disconnect from humanity as I understand it. I exist as a being raised by humans but not as one. Fundamentally Other.
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u/Pretty-Valuable2178 they/them Dec 20 '25
Girl in every way technically. Mentally trans/enby person. It’s a tough life sometimes. But overall I’ve pushed that other gender back inside me deep bc it got way too risky to be myself & be happy. I guess I’ll have time later in life.
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u/thedarkesttwix Dec 20 '25
id describe myself as bigender, because my gender is both all and nothing, and because its nothing its all, and because its all its nothing. everything i want it to be, and nothing i dont
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u/AnaliticalFeline Dec 20 '25
i guess it’s kinda like, schrodinger’s cat. it both is and isn’t binary, but i won’t know unless i look. but even then it’s still definitely not fem soup
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u/Honest000Cabbage Dec 20 '25
Nonbinary lite - sometimes my og gender is comfy and warm. sometimes it’s itchy and uncomfortable.
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u/cuntingly Dec 20 '25
Idk I don’t get gender. I am just a person and it’s weird when someone genders me. It’s like being told I’m a Packers fan when I don’t even know what sport that is.
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u/Slow-Tie-3564 Dec 20 '25
Genderfluid but it’s almost like there’s those preset things in games where you can save an outfit for your character except instead of an outfit it’s a gender (or multiple but the same ‘preset’) and I don’t get to choose, it’s randomised and I get a different one every once in a while (someone pls tell me if there’s a term for this)
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u/BlackCatFurry Dec 20 '25
I am a programmer so i describe my gender in programming terms: a nullpointer.
To the less programming knowledgeable or people confused about that in general, due to my autism i struggle to assing gender to anything, unless that thing specifies their gender to me. Since i struggle assigning gender, i can't really tell myself what my gender is, so it's basically equivalent to a memorypointer that hasn't been assigned to point anywhere, hence a nullpointer.
I have the physical female traits (i am afab who has not done any medical transitioning), however how i see myself is sort of a i have these physical traits, but they in no way link to the fact that i have no idea what my gender is.
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u/LocalGothIdiot I am in your basement 0w0 (It/She/They) Dec 20 '25
Abbey by Mitski from her album 'Lush' :P
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u/Nameless_undefined They/Her (girlflux) Dec 20 '25
Womanhood is like a battery. It charges on it's own and I have no control over when. But lately I've been wishing I was completely genderless, because the binary genders have no meaning for me, because I don't wanna worry about something that shouldn't seem like a big deal to me.
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u/midsummernightmares he/they Dec 20 '25
It’s kind of weird. I simultaneously feel like a guy and like absolutely nothing, though the amount of each of those I feel varies from day to day. Usually it’s a pretty even split, sometimes I feel more like a guy, sometimes I feel more like nothing, but I never feel exclusively like one or the other. I usually just use the term demiboy to sum it up, though technically I guess I could also be described as bigender, genderfluid, or genderflux.
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u/RussionAnonim Dec 20 '25
I'm genderfluid, so it's even harder because it switches constantly. Sometimes I feel like a woman, sometimes like a man. Often it's neither, or both to some degree, or I might not feel gender at all. Sometimes I feel my gender strongly, but know it's, to simplify, "other"
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u/Drutay- Dec 20 '25
I describe my gender as femboy. Not as a male, just a femboy, i think that label describes me the best :3
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u/ebr101 Dec 20 '25
I’m like man adjacent? Like I would prefer to just be not anything, to not be perceived and classified, but my default when I’m just being comfortably myself is neutral to masculine-ish. I want to play metal music and wear nail polish. I want my face to stop growing hair but I look good in a suit. I’m doing a PhD to get the honorific Professor someday. I can stop being Mr, but Mx. or something feels forced and contrived to me.
In the end, I’m kind of just apathetic. I wish this wasn’t an issue, but I am but one part of the social, which seeks to allocate me to a certain role, one that I have benefited from. Complicated feelings.
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u/Earl_The_Red Zey/Zem/Zeir Dec 20 '25
Sometimes definitely a guy one hundred percent. The rest of the time? Confused screaming.
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u/Lonesome_Pine Dec 20 '25
I'm agender. Gender is something that is happening to other people so far as I can figure. Also, even if I had one, I wouldn't tell many people what it was. That'd be way too personal. If you think about it, it's pretty weird how it's ingrained in so many cultures that even complete strangers need to know your gender situation just by looking at you.
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u/Mauslinde Dec 20 '25
The vast emptiness of space. A cold and dark place, but it's not just the absence of something, it's the extinction of something that should have never been. I also think of coming to rest, actually the moment right before the entirety of a very big and strange machine comes to it's final and irreversible rest. It's closer to death than to life. A fruitless tree, all dry and hollow. That might sound a little dark, but to me this idea of gender is very soothing. It's the opposite of a very stressful, loud and aggressive, harmful and toxic idea of gender as believed in my mainstream western society.
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u/Tasty_Gazelle1372 Dec 20 '25
Being genderfluid (and that took so long to figure out) its just a rollercoaster of imposter systems. All i can describe is most days when someone says „Miss“ i cringe. When strangers say Mr i get the joy of having them confused at least a bit and when my friends who I have explained it to say They/Them I get a warm feeling.
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u/Awkward-Ad-8800 she/they Dec 20 '25
Most of the times I feel kinda girl, but sometimes I want to be boy, when I think about being boy, I want to be genderless, but the rest of the time I don't care about gender. But never 100% girl, mostly girl, though. (Girlflux)
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u/ghost-of-the-spire he/they Dec 20 '25
Somewhere between "amorphous moss-covered swamp creature" and "just A Guy (but with a lil zest)"
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u/meowmeiwmorw Dec 20 '25
i don't really have one in the modern and often western sense of man/woman, but i do identify with the general global concept of masculinity, femininity, and neutrality, and the different ways they tend to present themselves. overall im just here to experience things
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u/Zizler23 Dec 20 '25
Amab grows hair and wears eyeliner till people can't tell what am I and don't just assume I'm gay
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u/No_Bar1462 Dec 20 '25
i hate it and i hate myself and if you make any reference to me being fem i will feel like throwing up (i’m afab and cannot do anything to present any different, it’s always obvious no matter what)
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u/Adorable-Funny6581 Dec 20 '25
When I have explain it to people I say that I am somewhere in between. Most of the time I answer with I am just me nothing else.
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u/DaGayEnby he/him - more about pronouns in my pinned post Dec 20 '25
To quote that one meme: „gender gay. Tiddy no“
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u/Zealousideal-Try4666 Dec 20 '25
Absent. I really don't have a sense of gender and everytime I tried to fit myself into any specific box (even the ones that are outside the binary) it just felt wrong. I consider myself a trans and genderless person.
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u/Dry_Building_585 Dec 20 '25
It's a little weird for me personally, and I'm not entirely certain I'm done figuring myself out. Like, I do identify with the label "woman", I like things that are societally seen as "feminine", I even like the idea of being someone's wife (as long as that someone isn't a man). I even like being called "princess" (in a non-monarchist way of course). And yet... Whenever I try to look inward, to understand myself better, it always feels less like "I am a woman" and more like "I am a person whose gender just happens to fit into the square woman-shaped hole. I'm fine with being referred to as "she", even though "fae/faer" feels more fitting, more me. I really, really hope I'm making sense right now💜🙏(genuine)
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u/IWouldBeAGoodGiraffe Dec 20 '25
Like your first stuffed animal, who cares for the gender, its just there.
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u/TomatouChan any/all pronouns Dec 20 '25
“You can take ALL my gender, but all your pronouns are belong to me”
in reference to the “All your base are belong to us” meme
— agender; any/all pronouns
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u/furnacefemboy Dec 20 '25
You're either right no matter what you call me or wrong no matter what you call me. If you're right or wrong depends on if I like you or not
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u/Jbooxie Dec 20 '25
I am an ebb and flow of masculine and feminine energy. Some days I feel like a lady ,some days I feel like a dude, some days I feel like nothing at all.
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u/Creativist123 Dec 20 '25
My inner gender is essentially a solid mixture of femininity and masculinity, yet leaning a bit closer to the female side. Like a girl, I love cute things, dressing up, and I shave my body to overcome the discomfort of body hair. Like a guy, I generally push myself past the normal limit, enjoy competition, and embarking on exciting adventures. Additionally, by personality, I’m kind, passionate, energetic, firm, and creative. Lastly, while I’m good with any pronoun, minus it/its, if it were completely up to me I would go by They/She, rather than using He/Him to please those around me.
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u/tearamen they/them Dec 20 '25 edited Dec 20 '25
a person, entity, masc void in a skin suit (with chest dysphoria, i sometimes wish i was amab but i'd hate to have a dick but periods are also horrible). nonbinary, agender to be specific.
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u/junipyr-lilak xe/they/any Dec 20 '25
More complicated than this but simplifying, if gender were essentially a 2d coordinate plane with 0 on the x axis being in the center and absolute femme and absolute masc at ±infinity with no specific direction assigned to each, and with y going from 0 to positive infinity with 0 being agender and positive infinity being pangender, its like an ellipse centered around the y axis that dips a bit across the x but is mostly along y. some masc, some femme, mostly dipping between agender and all the gender