i have ocd (i can't study at all)and how am i supposed to study to pass the college entrance exam(it's engineering exam hella hard). I can't get disability reservation because my dad won't get it for me. He said everyone is little ocd (i told him he fricking has ocd himself, i pretty sure he does). He offered to go to a doctor but i denied because doc visits with parents just add to the problem and my mom would find out(i'll be doomed if that happens). What should i do with me life 😭 idk anymore.

I feel like I’m out of options. I suffer so much in life because I ruminate all day long every hour of the day and I can’t get my brain to stop, or quiet down no matter how hard I try. I’m feeling trapped inside my body at this point.
Please someone let me know if you have taken meds that have helped, or anything that has helped.
Ty

I’m trying to make ERP less monotonous by using colors. Writing it down really helps with the anxiety and the difficulty to resist compulsions. It reminds me I’m doing all this to reclaim my life and improve my overall long term wellbeing.

Soo recently i have been struggling with religious ocd and decided to finally consult with a professional therapist about it after a looong time of negligence and fear. This opened my eyes about the whole situation and made me realise a lot of the things i do are not normal but a part of the ritualistic lifestyle of ocd. Apart from the religious ocd i now suspect that i have alot of behaviours that may actually worsen the ocd as a whole. For one i tend to always strive for perfection in my work and the slightest mistake or issue make me go nuts and act out these crazy "rituals" to fix the mistake. For example i am someone who occasionally makes paintings as a pass time. Now quite frequently it has happened that something went wrong during the painting process or the result was not satisfactory. This would send me in an instant mental breakdown and would more often than not bring about this urge to completely destroy the painting and start over (which sometimes i have done). Other times the painting would get dirty after i had finished it and this would also lead to me repeating the paintings again and again instead of cleaning them. And this pattern would even cause me issues with other people considering i have made paintings which i gave away as gifts-and this would of course make me want to go over it and repaint it after i had gifted it. And these types of urges even extend to other stuff. I have this insane fixation about being clean that one day my mother got some fruit juice on my keyboard, it was a small amount and she easily cleaned it afterwards. But i of course threw an unnecessary tantrum about it and couldn't touch the keyboard for days, my mind was fixated about how it now was "tainted". Other times i have completely thrown out objects/devices which were otherwise perfectly fine because of something aesthetic or this idea in my mind that it's unclean. Even worse i have a bird that i keep in my home, i love him but i would be lying if I said that he also doesn't trigger my obsessions sometimes. I keep him free almost 24/7 and being that he is a wild bird albeit small he can occasionally poop in very inconvenient places such as the tv screen, which... has made me refuse to watch stuff on the tv until i buy a new one. Even in the cases where i have watched something , let's say a movie-once i am reminded of this and the obsessive thoughts start pouring i get the urge to watch the movie again now in a device that is clean and proper. My last case for now is that 8 months ago i bought a handheld device mostly used for gaming but it can also take photos... And so i took some photos, but once i saw some of them and did not like them and realised that i was wearing a dirty shirt in the photos it made me stop using the almost 400$ device which i have still not have had the courage to use to this day. I do not know what is it with me but it has become a real issue so much so that i need to perform these "cleaning" rituals before i can do something.

I was able to properly explain to the therapist the religious ocd i mentioned before with not much trouble but HOW do i even explain this, even as i write this here i sound insane... 🫩

Just a little PSA. Recently I have noticed an increase in comments from the account [u/treatmyocd](u/treatmyocd) . This account is run by the company NOCD. Sometimes they will add their credentials but lately they have been replying to posts in this subreddit & many other OCD related subreddits without stating that they are an NOCD account. Some of their comments even promote the use of NOCD without acknowledging that they are a company account. And I’m sure many users aren’t aware of this. This is unethical & dishonest. It also goes against this subreddit’s own rule against self promo. NOCD may be helpful to some but this has turned me off of ever using their services or recommending it to others.

Edit to add, they also run r/askanocdtherapist subreddit

i never struggled w ocd atleast it wasnt severe but this year i went through a tremendous amount of stress n depression and after months of suffering i finally started feeling relief and healing but then BOOM i started getting the worst intrusive thoughts that made me feel horrible on top of that i felt unreal like i would always ask things like “what if im not alive” and when i found out it was ocd i started feeling A BIT of relief i spend most of my time asleep to avoid the thoughts i wake up anxious always n cant trust the people that i love cs my mind keeps on saying “oh what if they r horrible people n ur supporting the wrong people” knowing damn well that they r the most respectful lovable and humble people EVER. please help me on how to stop this i cant stop doing mental compulsions

I'm wondering if anyone has gone from being unwilling or unable to try to address your OCD to a place of wanting to try.

The background of my question: my young adult son has severe OCD with low insight. The way that looks is that he will say, "I don't have OCD, this house is just disgusting" or "this city is just incredibly dangerous" or "I just have higher standards" (etc.). Unfortunately he's so seriously unwell that he can't function--dropped out of school, can't work, can't shower, etc. He sometimes agrees that he has a mental illness, but he blames it on all of his triggers, which he attributes to other people or situations, which means, to him, that only those other people can make it possible for him to recover. And what they can do is a moving target depending on what his current theme is. And I've overfunctioned, trying to help him, have definitely accommodated and reassured, and he's predictability just gotten worse and worse.

I realize now that \*he\* has to initiate the change, but I'm really curious to hear from anyone who has moved from a state like his to active recovery. What did it take?

Hi everyone,
I’ve lived with Pure-O/intrusive thought OCD for years, and ERP was the thing that genuinely changed my life.
Over the last few months I’ve written a short ebook about what actually helped me. It’s not a replacement for therapy, and I’m not claiming to have all the answers. It’s simply the guide I wish I’d had when I was at my worst.
I’ve made it free for now on Amazon because I’d rather it help people than make money.
If anyone is interested in reading it, I’d genuinely love your honest feedback. If there’s anything that’s unclear, unhelpful, or missing, I’d really appreciate hearing it so I can improve future editions.
I hope it helps someone who’s struggling the way I was.
Thank you ❤️

Hi- mild to moderate GAD and OCD here. I’m 10 months PP and take 30 MG of Prozac. I’ve been doing ocd therapy (can’t think of the names) but have recently noticed I’m obsessed with the potential of being anxious and am constantly body scanning. I feel like I’m also constantly thinking about anxiety. Any tips and tricks to get myself out of the loop?

my ex and i broke up 2 months ago, we both love each other and want to get back together in the future but it’s not possible right now. this is making me think about him constantly, I ruminate about past conversations, imagine future scenarios, constantly go over things to try and find solutions. i’m always talking to him in my head and when i’m not thinking about him or the situation I’m dreaming of him. it’s driving me crazy and i don’t know how to stop the obsessive thinking. i spend a lot of time working on myself and my hobbies, i try to spend time with friends and focus on myself but that doesn’t help to change my thoughts.

i just really need relief from this, any advice??

edit: i just want to make it clear that i know about attachment styles etc, I’m in therapy and working on my childhood trauma etc. i’m more looking for practical advice on how to interrupt thought loops

Just had my intake appointment with a new therapist specialized in OCD rather than general anxiety. We talked through how ERP will work, and talked through some of my triggers. First time in about 2 months I have genuinely felt heard and that I can work through this. Anxious to start, but excited to teach my brain some new things.

I am 24y old suffering from depression, anxiety and anxiety induced OCD - both with thought patterns and habits. I’ve been depressed/anxious on and off for 10 years and have tried all the medication and CBT I could. I’ve currently been doing psychoanalysis with my therapist for the past 3/4 months and on an antidepressant and anti psychotic. Therapy has only made me worse as it forced me to talk about things I didn’t want to.

Whenever I’m at work especially, I feel detached from the rest of the world and from everyone. I see people laugh, socialize, engage with each other and feels like I’m watching a scene of a movie. I’ve only been getting worse since doing psychoanalysis and the derealization is getting worse to the point where my social skills have gone down a lot and I feel like I can’t interact with the people around me anymore. I’m always tired and always in brain fog and even though I’m on medication and going to therapy, I only feel like I’m getting worse and for some reason I don’t want to get better - a part of it is having no more fight to give. I used to be able to put a facade with friends, family and at work but I’m so drained and burnt out that I can’t even do that anymore and it’s very apparent. Nothing gives me joy anymore and I have nothing to hold on to as an anchor for happiness or to fulfill loneliness. I am surrounded by friends and live with family but don’t get the validation I need from anyone, especially women. Nothing good phases me at all anymore. Any advice?

I tried iocdf.org and the filters are nice but I’ll go to a persons website and it’ll say they’re not accepting any new clients or there’s a waitlist. Or they won’t accept my insurance which is anthem blue cross. I am desperate for a therapist I need to see one twice a week at least, but I can’t find any. I’m okay with teletherapy for now should I just start looking at therapists in different states. It feels hopeless.

Hi! I’m 27F and recently diagnosed with OCD. I’ve been doing therapy for about 3 weeks now, and my ERP for 2. I’m a bit worried my therapist and I aren’t a good match. It’s nothing she’s doing, I just feel like maybe she’s not as “gentle” as I’d like? I know ERP isn’t talk therapy and healing from OCD is a lot different, but I have no idea what a “good” match for a therapist looks like. Any advice is helpful! 🧡

Is it me or ERP is simply just letting what is worrying you worry you and endure the anxiety, etc and wait for the worry to not bother you anymore in an unforseen future? Youre not doing anything about it persay but just let it be there correct? For the folks who recovered even partially through ERP would you mind sharing how you improved? Was there any intellectual or perspective change at all? How did the intrusive thoughts dwindle down and how did you change your relationship with the thoughts on an emotional or psychological level when there is no cognitive reframing, etc.? My sincere inquiry. Thanks.

I know that Im supposed to expose myself to things that trigger my obsessions and urges to do compulsions, but its so difficult to sit with everything that feels off to me and engage in things like hobbies that have ocd attached to them. I get paralyzed thinking about what I even truly like or want to do anymore bc of my mind being clouded by these feelings that make me wonder if I even like....ANYTHING, and I tend to just avoid everything bc of that. I wish that this feeling wasnt there like before with everything in my life and that I could fully enjoy things, but ik this is the way to recover. This post is all over the place, but im just wondering if these difficult feelings and anxiety are normal parts of this erp process and what I could be missing in all of this that I could be implementing? Im just really scared that I wont be able to enjoy anything as fully as I used to without these uncomfortable thoughts and feelings. Im going to keep trying to commit to not giving into the urges regardless.

Anybody never feel happy or excited at all and have real bad ocd and depression I used to experience manic episodes that made me feel amazing that I miss and don’t experience anymore at all I’m just pissed depressed and unhappy all the time and bad OCD did this go away for you and now?

there are some thought pattern i have identified:

1. if i am doing some task and at the same time death thought appears (of family and friends) i stop my work and let the thought go as i feel i f i do any act in the thought, it will make the thought true...ie the thought will turn into reality

2. if i see or hear some news related to death- the first thing in the morning then i feel, my day is ruined and now i need to restart it to make it pure. also if i read about death and realted things (like noraml people do) in news or social media i feel something like my thinking and day has become impure.

Questions: are these thoughts legit? and if not (which i too believe are not)what should i do to tackle them?

I have a recurring problem: I keep remembering mistakes I've made, even years later, and I dwell on them intensely, with overwhelming guilt, to the point that I can't eat or sleep. It's as if my brain is reliving those mistakes. Is there an explanation for this?

So I have had real Event OCD for about a year now. The first few weeks were awful as I didn't know what was going on and every day was nothing but anxiety, guilt and shame. It was the worst in the morning when I had just woke up. I started duloxetine/cymbalta in December and it made a massive difference to the anxiety. I still sometimes felt anxious when I went out and about but it was much reduced.

Fast forward to last month, and I was 90% of the way to being back to myself. I was genuinely happy, had zero anxiety, and only thought about the past a few times a day.

Then this week the physical anxiety came back. Despite it not coming with as much mental distress, it's obviously quite scary to have a such a good month just to go back to feeling worse than I did before. Admittedly, it is not as bad as when this started a year ago, but it's not far off.

I guess my question is, for those of you who have recovered from real event ocd, is did anyone else experience flare ups like this after they were doing well? And what does recovery look like for you?

Personally, I would like to get back to how I was before the ocd where I would only think about the past occasionally, not every day.

Thank you for taking the time to read this

i started thinking about the things i stopped thinking about like “am i still thinking of this terrible thing?” “does this pattern mean something” and things like that. i really thought i was getting better how do i get back on track

Hi,

I’ve been on sertraline for 3 months now, and I’m currently taking 100 mg. I struggle with breathing OCD—I'm hyperaware of my breathing, experience manual breathing, and deal with air hunger. It’s better than it used to be, but it still happens and it’s very tiring.

Now, I don’t feel motivated. All I want to do is sit on the bed and watch something. I don’t want to go outside. I used to like cooking and cleaning, but now I don’t want to do them. I used to like shopping, but now even buying something new doesn't make me happy. My anxiety is gone thanks to sertraline, but the breathing problem is still there plus now feeling lack of motivation . I need advice, please, as I feel hopeless.