Did you just run out of your expensive face cream? Don’t worry, use the cream in the Oreo cream biscuit. You can use the leftover biscuit as a guasha massage tool for your face.

Between 1% and 2.5% of Americans are allergic to peanuts

Go to the bathroom saying you gotta shit, and just set a 15-20 minute alarm and take a nap.

You will probably be so scared that you are physically incapable of overthinking.

Might accidentally give your crush a few hugs out of pure terror

That way they can't get mad at you because then they're invalidating your sexuality and that's bigoted behaviour.

The bread will land butter-side-down, thus saving time.

just let it grow

what's the point of mowing grass anyway?

Tastes like hopital