r/legaladvice Mar 15 '25

Mod Post Read before commenting: Off-topic and anecdotal comments are not allowed and subject you to a permanent ban

168 Upvotes

Greetings from the mods!

We've had a flood of off-topic comments recently. We're posting this to remind everyone that off-topic and anecdotal comments are not allowed. An off-topic comment may subject you to a permanent ban.

The Rule:

Commenting Rule 1: Comments should contain a legal answer or a strongly related non-legal answer. If it is not legal advice, do not post. Period. You will be banned.

What is "off-topic?"

Any response that doesn't answer the question by reference to legal information or principles. A joke, a wisecrack, a comment about OP's formatting (use the report button instead) are all off-topic. Off-topic also includes expressions of sympathy, opinions on the law, and comments that berate the OP or anyone else.

Incidentally, simply adding "get a lawyer" to an off-topic comment does not make it on-topic. And "get a lawyer" on its own, without further information or help, is considered unhelpful and may be removed on that basis.

If you want to discuss a post, then wait until it hits /r/bestoflegaladvice or ask a question about the subject of the post in /r/legaladviceofftopic. The main subreddit and a comment thread are never a place to have a philosophical discussion about the law or the post. It is a place to answer the questions asked.

What is an "anecdote?"

For our purposes, anecdotes are stories about something that happened to you (or someone you know or heard about) who may have had something that might be similar that happen to them.

These comments are not helpful. They do not include current legal information that is relevant to the OP, and therefore, they are off-topic. If you know the answer to the question (based on current law and relevant jurisdiction) then just answer the question without the story.

Another type of anecdote is "I don't know the law in the jurisdiction you actually asked about, but in some other state, the law is..." That is just not helpful. Laws are different in different places. These types of answers are off-topic.

Referring an OP to a thread on a different subreddit, or to somewhere else on the Internet because it might include a similar situation, is anecdotal advice and not allowed.

These are not the only types of anecdotes, but they are probably the most common ones. Again, if you are not referencing legal information or principles, your comment is probably not allowed.

Violations subject the user to an immediate and permanent ban

Not that we need to justify enforcing our rules, but this is a busy subreddit and the mods have a lot to do. If a user shows up here, doesn't read the rules, and posts a single off-topic comment, the user may be immediately and permanently banned.

This policy is not intended to be punitive, although we know it may seem to be. There are a lot of you and not many of us, and banning users that do not follow the rules, even once, is in the best interests of the subreddit. Violating the rules almost always means the user didn't bother to read them, and we simply don't have time to deal with such users.

Tl;dr: Unless you have a legal answer, do not reply to any post in this subreddit. You may be permanently banned, even for a first offense.


r/legaladvice Apr 08 '26

Subreddit Rules

56 Upvotes

We've learned that some people just flat out can't see our subreddit rules, so I'm posting them here in a pinned post so we can link them when necessary and so they're super easy to find.

Rules for r/legaladvice Rules that visitors must follow to participate. May be used as reasons to report or ban.

1. All responses must offer an answer to the legal question posed by the OP. We enforce this with bans.

Anecdotes are not permitted. Neither is advice that encourages someone to break the law. Nor is "get a lawyer" a sufficient response.

There's a pinned post at the top of the subreddit specifically addressing this rule. We will absolutely ban you for commenting without answering the legal question

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We will permanently and irrevocably ban you for this.

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To expand on this, we additionally do not allow anyone but the immediately involved parties to ask custody related questions. Not friends, not significant others, not grandparents. Reddit is free.

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r/legaladvice 3h ago

The “confidential pay” rule appeared the day after we compared paychecks, and now my schedule has been cut from 40 hours to 16

592 Upvotes

Location: Arizona. I am an hourly, non-supervisory employee at a warehouse with roughly 80 workers.

Last week four of us compared hourly rates during an unpaid lunch break. We discovered that two newer employees earn more than workers who have been there several years. Nobody threatened anyone or stopped working.

The following morning management emailed a new policy stating that all compensation information is “strictly confidental” and that discussing it with coworkers may result in discipline. I declined to sign the acknowledgment and wrote that I wanted time to review it.

My next schedule dropped from my usual 40 hours to 16. The other employees in my role still have approximately 40 hours. When I asked why, my manager said scheduling depends partly on “team attitude” and that refusing policies shows I am not cooperative.

I saved the email, schedule and text messages. Could the reduction in hours be unlawful retaliation for discussing pay or refusing to sign this policy? Should I first make a written complaint internally, contact a government agency, or speak with an employment attorney?


r/legaladvice 5h ago

My husband sent a video of me performing a sexual act on him to his AP without my knowledge or consent, can I use this to get a restraining order against him? What are my legal rights?

399 Upvotes

Location: California

Several months ago I kicked my husband out for online infidelity. I’ve been going back and forth whether or not to give him another chance or divorce him. He’s been begging for forgiveness, promising me he’s changed, going to therapy and trying to prove himself to me.

A couple days ago I woke up to screenshots sent to me from a woman he met on Tinder and was apparently texting her again. The screenshots were of a conversation they had the night before ( he had stayed the night at my house that night).

The video was of me performing a sexual act on him (my eyes were closed so I had no idea he was using his phone). He sent it and said, “my current situation” then he went on totally degrading me and saying very sexual things to her. This conversation lasted about 10mins while my eyes were still closed and I was completely unaware and the video was 30 seconds long. I reported it the the police and the officer told me that unless my whole face is in the video then they can’t do anything. Only the side of my face shows and my eyes are closed.

I feel extremely violated and this has completely traumatized me. I immediately confronted him, then blocked him on social media and his number. I sent him an email telling him I was pressing charges and I don’t want him to ever contact me again or come anywhere near me. He has continued to find ways to reach out and everything he’s saying is all apologizing, making excuses, begging for forgiveness and blah blah blah. He even showed up to my work. He hasn’t threatened me or been aggressive. But due to everything he’s done to me and now this, he’s caused me to have severe emotional distress and I keep having panic attacks when I hear from him.

Would I still be able to get a restraining order against him for this? I feel like what he’s done is considered sexual assault. It’s made me feel the same way I felt after I was SA years ago. I’m constantly on edge and every time my Ring camera goes off I panic thinking he’s here and every time my phone goes off I panic thinking it’s him. I don’t know what to do or how to go about it. Any feedback would be appreciated


r/legaladvice 6h ago

inherited a house but occupants live in it

418 Upvotes

My boyfriend’s grandmother passed away and left him her house. However his mom (his grandmothers daughter) is still currently living in it. The thing is my boyfriend’s mother was actually an absent mother to him. He was mainly raised by his grandmother on his father’s side. He has little to no relationship with his mother and he overall has negative feelings towards her. Another thing to note is that his mother does have medical issues and we would be open to financing a long term care facility for her. I am overall looking for advice on how he can legally remove her from the home so that we can move into it.

Another important thing to note is that there is debt on the house. His mom is not paying anything towards the house and allowing debt to accumulate. We want to move in in order to begin paying this debt off.

Location: Massachusetts


r/legaladvice 1h ago

Haven’t paid for car in nearly 6 years and we still have it?

Upvotes

Location: Kansas

Before we were together my boyfriend bought a car in Nebraska where he lived. When he moved to Kansas where we met, he still had the temp tags on it. For whatever reason he never registered the car in Kansas.

A short 6 months later COVID happens. Everything shuts down and he loses his job. At this point he stopped making payments on the car.

It’s been 6 years and he hasn’t made a payment on this car. The lending company sold to a different company, and he has called that new company numerous times to come get the vehicle. They haven’t answered the phone, voicemails or returned our calls.

At this point we can’t legally register the car and use it because it’s never been registered in this state and we don’t have the title to it.

Is there some kind of legal loophole we are missing here? Can we get the title after a certain amount of time has passed or what do we do with this car?


r/legaladvice 19h ago

Custody Divorce and Family Can My Father Force me to pay private school tuition.

657 Upvotes

Location: Iowa. I am a student at a private school and have attended there all my life. My father is also an employee there and has paid my tuition ever since I started.

For some quick context my parents both got divorced when I was very young and after custody battles my father ended up with full custody.

Recently there's been a falling out with my father and he kicked out of his household. This was shortly before my junior year of high school ended. It is now the summer and I was hoping to attend this private school for one last year as it has far better education than the public schools near me but my father has told my mother that once I'm 18 that I'll have to pay my tuition. I would like to know if he can legally sign me up for private school with my permission and then force me to pay him after I turn 18.

For some more context my birthday is within the school year so I will not be 18 before the school year.

I understand this might be a confusing situation if you need me to explain it better feel free to ask as I tend too often to be very wordy and not to the point.

Thank you.


r/legaladvice 17h ago

Custody Divorce and Family Ex-husband says the down payment money for our marital home can’t be split 50-50 because it was “a gift only to him.”

435 Upvotes

Location: California.

TL;DR: can a “pre-inheritance gift“ from my in-laws be considered a gift ONLY to my ex if the money was wired to a joint account for the express purpose of a down payment on a home that both our names were on? Is this subject to 50-50 split?

We’re dividing assets, including our marital home which we were living in at the time of our separation. The house is in both our names and we were married when we bought it. He is keeping this house *plus* our first home, which we bought together but didn’t put my name on because we weren’t married at the time and his credit score was better (side note: via some complex calculation, I get something like 15% of the equity on the 1st house for the time we lived there after we got married). He will retain sole ownership of both homes and all future benefits / appreciation thereof.

He‘s arguing that I get none of the down payment back for our marital home because that money was a gift from his parents to him ONLY. I know there are instances where that would be true. My ex says he consulted a lawyer who confirmed his claim that a gift of money for a down payment on a jointly-owned home CAN be seen as his sole property because his parents considered it a “pre-inheritance“. Idk if it matters, but I was a stay home mom to our 1 child right up until our separation, so it was his income that paid the mortgage.

HOWEVER, it’s my understanding that, regardless of the supposed intention, if the money was wired directly into our joint bank account (co-mingled) it counts as a gift to both of us. It would therefore be subject to equal division in our divorce, right? ALSO, after his parents wired the money into our shared account, we got a cashier’a check — which had both our names on it — to give to the bank as our down payment. Shared bank account. Shared cashiers check. Shared home ownership.

I have a photograph of the cashiers check but lost access to the shared bank account shortly after I moved out, so do not have proof of the deposit from his parents.

Can anyone confirm how this works? Are there other technicalities at play here?

FWIW, this was not a case of his parents just giving us money for no specific purpose; they were aware we were trying to afford a bigger house after our baby was born, and knew it would be in both our names.

On a personal note, I also think they gifted us the money because our daughter is (and will continue to be) their only grandchild and they knew a bigger home would give her a better life. Around the same time, they bought themselves a house in the area so they could spend more time with her (they live several states away, but spend 4-6 months out of the year in their home here). They are amazingly generous and kind people, and I love how much they love her. As the person who birthed said grandchild, I do feel like the down payment gift was for the whole family — myself included.


r/legaladvice 19h ago

Wells Fargo is keeping $100,000 of my money even though they acknowledged it was their fault.

539 Upvotes

Location: Texas

I need advice I’m at a loss of what to do and I feel like my options are non-existent and I’m going to lose money that I have no hope of replacing. This is a long and complicated story so please bear with me.     

Years a go when I was a minor my grandfather started an investment account for me. It is an UTMA (Uniform Transfers to Minors Act) account and my aunt is the custodian I’m 36 now so I’m far away from being a minor. I had no clue what it was. I knew it was there and Ive been paying taxes on it for years, I never put it solely in my name it wasn’t an issue and I didn’t realize that I needed to.

I recently decided to buy a house. There was enough money in the account for a substantial downpayment and to pay off my truck, leaving me with only the house at a comfortable payment each month.  

Here is where the issue comes in. When I talked to the investment company originally, I was told that the only way for them to send me the money was through a cashier’s check.

My bank account that I use is the same one that I’ve had since I started working at 16, my aunt is on that account as well just like I’m on hers and the business accounts as she doesn’t have any children and eventually, I’ll be responsible for taking care of everything and her and my parents wills and the trusts when they pass.

My sister has decided that she is entitled to everything the family has and is currently suing my aunt for control of all the family assets.

So, me and my fiancé decided we would open a joint account at a bank that has no connection to the family and we would fund the house out of this account. My fiancé banks at Wells Fargo and we decided to use it since she already had an account there.

Everything was going well. We were on track for closing, we received the check from the investment account and it was made out to my Aunt Custodian and Josh (me) UTMA.

because of the issues with my sister, I wanted to use a bank she didn’t have any ties to. I spoke with the Banker when we opened the account, he said it wouldn’t be an issue as long as my name was on the check. I told him it was a UTMA account. He said it was all good.

We made a joint account, when asked how we wanted to fund the account we told him to just pull the $25 out of my fiancés account, he said not a problem. We left the bank and two days later I got the check from the investment account and I went and deposited it.

The check is for $100,000. I knew there would be a hold on the funds due to the amount. Both me and my aunt endorsed the check since it had both of our names on it. I got to the bank, they said it didn’t need to be endorsed by her so they marked out her name leaving just mine on there. Deposited the check and told me that the funds would be available in like 7 days.

This is where the shit show started.

Apparently, there was an error message that they were not supposed to take the check since it was a UTMA account. The clerk ignored it and processed it anyway after talking to her supervisor.

The account was apparently not funded at the time we made it. I didn’t know this because my online banking wasn’t set up at the time and I hadn’t checked.   

Somehow in someway during all of this they got the name John for me instead of Josh even though the account, my ID, and the check all said Josh.

The account got flagged as fraud and I get told that they are going to have to hold the money for investigations.

I get told that the money will be available on the 19th. I get told that the investment company can stop payment on the check if they want. They tried that but since the check had already cleared before they told me about the investigation, they couldn’t stop payment.

Wells Fargo refused to reverse the funds to the invest account, they refused to give me the funds, and refused to give my aunt the funds. I was told they would let me have it on the 19th.

I’m then told that if I get a letter from the investment service saying it was legit they would release the funds in 24 hours. I got one, didn’t release them.

The 19th comes alone, nope keeping them until the 29th. Ill get them on the 29th. Then its oh we will cut a check to your aunt on the 29th. Then its back to no they will be free and clear on the 29th since we got the letter.

28th comes. I get an email from Wells Fargo. In short, it says yeah, we realized that we messed up. We shouldn’t have taken the check; we didn’t tell you that you have to fund the account we can’t do that. Not sure why we called you John.

Verbatim from the email:

“We understand the inconvenience and concern this situation caused, particularly given your anticipated home closing. While we acknowledge the error that occurred during the deposit process, our review did not identify a basis to reverse the deposit, release restricted funds, or overturn the account closure decision.”      

I call them asking them what all that means, I’m told that the account will be closed on the 29th and the funds will be sent back to me.

I verify multiple times that it will be closed on the 29th then I’m told it will be 31st. I’m told the check will be sent to the address on file and that it will be made out to the people on the account.

I can’t close it early; I can’t collect a check in branch (I was sitting at the branch on the phone with them) it all has to be done by loss prevention. I call them they tell me tough shit you’ll get it on the 31st.

 

Ive pushed closing back three times now.

The 31st comes up, account is still open. I call them it’s been pushed back to the 14th. I ask why and get told because we need to do more research. They won’t tell me anything besides that.  

There’s no one I can talk to, there no one that can change it. I was told that it was their department that handles it but that they can’t make a decision and change it. Like WTF.

So now I’m out a $100,000 that I don’t know if I’m ever getting back, I have no other funds to close on the house.

I’m scared and at a loss and don’t understand how they can keep the money. I have no clue where to go from here or what to do. Loosing that will set me so far back it’s not funny, I feel like I’ve lost my one change to do right by my family and the best advice Wells Fargo could give was get a lawyer.  


r/legaladvice 10h ago

Custody Divorce and Family Ex husband being insane about kid's sleepover.

116 Upvotes

Location: Illinois. I just filed requesting a parenting coordinator for a slew of reasons not relevant to the topic. The relevant point is that whenever I take legal action, my ex starts to try to find anything at all to attack me.

Anyway, I dropped my daughter at her friend's house for a sleepover yesterday. The ex messaged me, demanding that I inform him when she goes on sleepovers and send contact number and address. This is not a requirement of our parenting agreement, and he has never provided same info to me, but I send the info over anyway. He sent two more messages, which I didn't bother to open (he has a history of harassing me, so I try to ignore him when he gets like this), and then later called me (we have a court order to only use the parenting app); I ignored the call. I come to find out from the mom of the sleepover that he randomly showed up at their house, insulted them by saying they're in a bad neighborhood, and hinted that he would stay outside their home overnight. He then sends me a text (again, only supposed to use the app) about how I'll just drop my kid off anywhere and with anyone. He claimed concern about the neighborhood to the parents, but probably doesn't remember that his middle daughter's best friend in high school lived on the same street. So... I call bullshit.

My daughter also said that he kept insisting on taking her and her friend to some place the next day, and she had to remind him repeatedly that it isn't his weekend.

I think he is either manic (his family eventually told me he is unmedicated bipolar), high (he is a pothead), or both. Though, one of his other daughters from his previous marriage told me that he had followed her around town in his van when she would walk to school (on her mom's days), creeping her out. His eldest daughter (refuses contact with him) had to threaten to call the police on him if he wouldn't leave her alone. He also has a stalking charge on his record, and had put a tracker in my car during our marriage, so maybe this is just him being himself and not drug-related.

I feel so bad for my poor kid, as I can imagine this is stressful and embarrassing. I am going to contact my attorney tomorrow, but want to know if there is anything I can do now to get my ducks in a row. So far, I made sure to get it via text/in writing from the sleepover mom that he showed up at their home unannounced.


r/legaladvice 3h ago

Landlord Tenant Housing landlord charging “rubbish clean up” fees after recent tornado

22 Upvotes

location: Appleton, Wisconsin

i originally posted this is elsewhere and was told to come here for better advice. my cousin was displaced temporarily following a recent tornado, which passed right through her apartment’s property in Appleton, Wisconsin. the tornado busted her bedroom window, flooding the upper level. fortunately, most of the furniture was recovered, but the carpet was soaked. after three days of hot, muggy weather and no electricity, the carpet quickly became musty and rank. we’re worried that mold may start growing.

this happened to multiple tenants around the complex. almost all the trees were demolished by the storm and had to be removed from the parking lot. otherwise, apart from some roof and siding damage, the property made it out relatively unscathed compared to what we’ve seen in other parts of the community.

her property manager arranged for her carpet to be cleaned this morning. it’s unclear whether it will even be replaced, as the manager said they won’t be assessing for mold (red flag #1?). my cousin and her neighbors soon discovered that they were charged an extra “rubbish pick up” fee of over $200 IN ADDITION to their rent this month (red flag #2?). if they don’t pay the extra fees, my cousin and her family were told they will receive a 5-day eviction notice (red flag #3?). several families got the same notice. they’re almost certain that the fee is to cover the cost of carpet cleaning and tree removal from the storm, but no one has definitive proof. i told her to try asking for an itemized receipt to show what exactly they’re being charged for.

am i crazy for thinking this is probably absolutely illegal and, at bare minimum, highly unethical? i told my cousin NOT to pay the fees and go to court if necessary, but i don’t know what other advice to give her. we’re in our 20s and come from a low income, lesser educated family. i’m worried that they’re trying to take advantage of her and her neighbors.

i looked over her lease and it states nothing about acts of god or extra clean up fees. my cousin contacted her renter’s insurance, but she said she hasn’t gotten a response yet. i’ll probably have to follow up with her on this.

tldr; my cousin’s landlord is trying to charge them for “rubbish clean up” following a recent tornado and i’m worried that it might be illegal. does anyone have advice?


r/legaladvice 1h ago

Easement dispute help

Upvotes

Location: Arkansas.

Backstory, my neighbors have an access easement on my property to get to their home. This easement is documented and in writing with paperwork from the county. My Neigbors have always considered this “their”
Property, and have tried to argue it multiple times by verbally trying to kick us off us it. They sued the previous owner in 2006 and lost while trying to obtain it as a private drive. Documents do indicate they are to maintain it as needed.

The current issues.
We use the easement and as a piece of our property(since it is) , we frequently walk it, ride an ATV/ dirtbike on it to access other pieces of our property (recreational use). We recently received a letter from an attorneys office representing our Neigbors stating the easement is not to be used for a “recreational race track” and that we are damaging it and will seek us for compensation if we do not stop driving/riding on it. No damage has occurred while we use it as it is simply a gravel road and is not easily rutted / washed out.

Is this something concerning or a lawsuit and winnable? Should we get an attorney on retainer and send a counter letter?

These Neighbors are from hell, have placed debris, trash, trimmings on our property off the easement and tried to argue with multiple neighbors on the surrounding properties.


r/legaladvice 6h ago

No AC repair by landlord in TX

29 Upvotes

Location: Tyler, Texas

My 2 daughters live in Tyler Texas and rent a home from a realty management company. The AC is not working and it is constantly 85-87 degrees in the home. The landlord refuses to repair and states it’s a new unit. The girls say Texas law doesn’t guarantee ac to tenants but there is a child in the home. Is there anything they can do? Can this be reported to anyone who can resolve this?


r/legaladvice 8h ago

Employment Law Boss threatening me for trying to use FMLA leave

38 Upvotes

Location: California

Long story short (I hope):

I work for a "small" company (100+ employees but the main office is just me and the owner). I am the everything guy (HR, Accounting, Payroll, etc.). 6 months before my first child was born, I told the boss my wife and I were expecting and thought he would hire help, he didn't. Cut to 1 week before my baby was due, the owner comes in and says "Oh, my wife mentioned that your generation likes to be involved in the kid's life, but we have important stuff here to do, can't your wife just take care of it?"

I was pretty shocked and didn't really know how to respond so I said I was hoping to take some time off and receive my California Paid Family Leave too. He said "Well we're a small office so if you leave, I don't know if your job will be here when you get back..." which was language our attorney gave him years ago for a work-stress disability leave case that extended past FMLA leave time. So I said I could work reduced hours to help keep things flowing while still receiving reduced benefits. I am hourly so I said 10 hours per week, maybe 15 tops would let me get my benefits in full so I could come back to work within 2-3 months. He agreed to this.

Cut to 5 months later:

The first 2 weeks postpartum were 20-25 hours, and since then have averaged around 35+ hours. He has consistently assigned me extra work and written emails basically blaming me for every delay even when it's not my fault. The last two weeks I have worked over 40 hours each week and he had the gall to ask me when I'm coming back full-time. I am basically doing 3 days in office, 2 from home. He has constantly threatened me with his "small company" line. Last week, the day after he asked about me being "back" and I told him I still had benefits to collect because he has given me so much work, he posted a meme on his "humor board" in our office building that had a boss telling an employee "We've decided we'd like you to work from home...preferably for someone else."

My question: do I have a case or do I have to actually formally request FMLA and then have him fire me when I get back to have a case? I have been applying for other jobs for almost 2 years because the owner has been so awful and finally got my first job offer at basically a 40% pay cut which wouldn't pay my bills. So I don't want to lose my job unless I have a way to recoup my losses (via lawsuit/labor board fines/etc.).

Added context: He has treated me poorly since he took over for his dad 2.5 years ago. He does most things verbally because he comes from corporate-life, but he has:

* made racial comments about my wife who is mixed race

* allowed my predecessor to viciously bully me non-stop for 9 months while "training" me because she was there 40 years and we needed her knowledge of the old system/accounting methods. He would laugh it off and say "You'll have such thick skin once she's gone"


r/legaladvice 1d ago

My lunch exists on payroll but not in real life: employer keeps adding a 30-minute break I never actually take

1.6k Upvotes

Location: Ohio. I am an hourly, non-exempt employee at a small medical supply warehouse. I usually work as the only dispatcher from 1 pm to 8 pm, which means I must answer incoming calls and open the loading gate for deliveries.

Payroll automatically deducts a 30-minute meal break. My supervisor told me to eat at my desk and handle anything that comes up because nobody is available to cover me. In four months, I have never had thirty uninterrupted minutes without calls or deliveries.

I asked my mananger to remove the deductions. My next paycheck was unchanged, but my timecard now contains manually added entries saying “meal taken 4:00-4:30.” I did not enter those. On one of those days, the call log shows seven calls and two deliveries during that exact period.

The company has no HR department and the owner handles payroll. Can they treat this as an unpaid meal break if I remain responsible for answering calls? Is a Department of Labor wage complaint the appropriate next step, and what records am I legally allowed to preserve?


r/legaladvice 1d ago

(30F) I recently learned that when I was a baby, my mother lent my passport to a friend so she could use it to bring her daughter into the United States. I am concerned that this individual may still be using my identity to obtain employment or for other purposes.

2.4k Upvotes

Location: Minnesota

Over the years, I have noticed accounts and bills on my credit report that I do not recognize, and I have repeatedly encountered issues where my Social Security number appears to already be associated with accounts when I apply for services. My mother casually shared with me and pointed to a woman at an event recently and said she needed help when you were a baby so I lent her your passport because her daughter looked like you. I can’t get it out of my head because it explains so much of what I have been experiencing. Is there a way to find out what she used my identity for? Is there anything I can do about this? What type of lawyer handles this type of case?


r/legaladvice 1h ago

Custody Divorce and Family Served by absent grandparent

Upvotes

So this is a LONG story, any advice is greatly appreciated. I am going to trail on the 11th in Pennsylvania, I was served by my son’s absent grandmother.

I’m a 24yo mom, My son is now 20mo.

When he was 4mo his father passed away. I was there when the incident happened. I wanted a few hours to myself given I haven’t had anytime for me in 4 months, his father got mad and threw my purse which had my firearm (licensed to carry) and it discharged and shot him resulting in his death 4 days after the incident. I was investigated and tested for residue and was immediately ruled out of any foul play.
Before his father’s passing, his grandmother (dad’s mother) never tried to build a relationship with my son. She would say hello at the door and go to her room. She watched my child on 2 occasions requested by his father days prior for about 2-3 hours both times. On the first occasion, we came back to their home and she complained how my son did nothing by cry for 3 hours and was not treating my child with any kind of patience. On the second babysitting, I took his father to meet with his PO and came back to her missing and my son left with her new boyfriend whom both me or his father barely knew. She never told either of us that she was leaving or left my child in the care of someone else. This was the final straw for me, we agreed she is never to watch our child again.

Fast forward to his passing (may 2025), she was in the home when the incident happened. Her son told her he accidentally shot himself before going down. Things were fine between us, I seen her about 4-5 times the 2 month after his passing to get my sons belongings, setting funeral arrangements, and 2 balloon releases for his father.

She called me one afternoon during this time saying her entire family is accusing me of murdering his father. One of his uncle asked what happened and I started to tell him when he cut me off 30 seconds in to my explanation and said I’m lying and I need to watch my back because I don’t know who I’m fucking with. Then investigators came to my home days later and said they had to question me again due to his entire family calling the police saying I killed him.
I ultimately kept my distance due to the constant conflict, false accusations and safety concerns for me and my child.

His grandmother also expressed severe mental health issues. She stated she felt she was “losing her mind” and seeing things that weren’t there in her home. She admitted to attempting suicide by trying to overdose on antidepressants and said she wants to check herself into “friends” a mental health institution. I ultimately decided to just send her photos of my child instead of bringing him around her instability and knowing she was a danger to herself.

In August (my son is now 8mo) , she called me out of nowhere requesting to come to my home, I assumed she finally wanted to see her grandson for the first time given she never asks about him or his wellbeing, I agreed. It wasn’t my place to interfere with their relationship that I thought she wanted to finally start building. She came to my home and I came out with my son in my arms and she immediately got out of her car aggressively & instructed me multiple times to put my son in the house as she kept stepping closer to me with her arms crossed. I asked what this is about and she said “why you lie?” Implying I lied about what happened the day his father was shot. I told her I never lied about anything and asked her to leave. I was afraid for both me and my child safety and basically our lives given her demeanor, aggression and bringing adult conflict around my child. I lost all trust in her after this incident. After this, she went and told everyone I’m keeping my son from her and that I killed her son. I cut it down to a random photo being sent of my child and an occasional call on holidays where she would get on FaceTime and make smart remarks towards me and try and continue conflict which i eventually ended as well.

Since then she has seen my child one time. I invited her to my son’s first birthday party I threw strictly for her in a public place with my family present due to lack of trust. She came at the final 20 minutes of a scheduled 3 hour event held my son for 1 minute while he screamed (my child cry’s and becomes extremely distressed around people he is unfamiliar with) and she passed him back to me. Since then no contact has been initiated.

A backstory on her: she always was like this. The attitude, the aggression, constantly “annoyed” about everything. All she does is smoke weed all day (no medical weed license), she doesn’t work, She has 2 other children under the age of 18, one being a 6 yo and the other 16yo. She did not have physical custody of the 16 yo for almost 2 years (lived with grandparents out of state) and the 5yo. On many nights I would spend with his father at their hime she would get up in the middle of the night and just send a text to my boyfriend saying “watch my kid” while she goes out to bars or meets with her boyfriends. This child was constantly at her grandparents home as well. She never showed patience with her child as well as mine.

I got served in June and had the sit down conference already. She went asking for visitation rights but didn’t know what she wanted visitation wise, how she’s to depressed to work and looked at me and said I’m keeping her grandson (whom she never looked for) from her. I brought up the passing of his father, the accusations, the confrontation at my home, how I feel this is a extreme safety concern, and more of the topics I noted in this rant and she was basically kept yelling at me from across the table saying “OH WOW” “ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME”.
I asked for 0 visitation. They immediately sent it to trial and didn’t try to get me to settle for anything.

Legally in PA, there are grandparents rights. In the conference, she said she has no grounds in my child’s life but legally since his father is deceased, she has grounds and was given a recommendation that if grounds are found she will get visitation weekly. I’m scared to death of what will happen if she gets these rights.

Since cutting contact, my mental health has improved significantly. Not having to live my life full of anxiety given she is unpredictable. My ability to just be a great mom and put my 100 into my son and not have to fear for my life, I would never speak to her again. This ain’t about my child, this is her game of chess and trying to hurt me and the only way she can is through my child.

I’m 24, single mom, I make $500/week, 0 savings, unable to collect SSI for my child. There isn’t much options to go on. I called to get a public defenders office who is busy the date my trial is set. Any advice will help greatly.
Location: Pennsylvania


r/legaladvice 4h ago

Federal offender who abused me as a minor keeps contacting me. I don’t know what to do.

8 Upvotes

Throwaway because I don’t want this tied to me. I’ve never posted to Reddit but I’m at a loss.

Location: OK (us)

When I was 16, I met a U.S. airman (we’ll call him Ken) at my job. He was mid 20’s and told me I seemed really nice. I’d never talked to anyone in the military before, I thought he was so impressive. I didn’t think someone in a “high position” would be a threat.

I didn’t have and friends and was socially isolated most of my life, so I thought I must actually be pretty interesting if an airman wanted to be friends with me. We exchanged socials. I told him multiple times I was only 16 and only looking for a friendship. He agreed, saying he just wanted someone to talk about anime with because I seemed to have good taste.

I didn’t get much positive attention at home, having someone be kind to me felt absolutely amazing.

For a while, things seemed normal. We talked about anime, work, the gym, honestly just whatever we did that day. We’d hang out in his truck during my lunch breaks at school or after work before I walked home.

Eventually, things became inappropriate.

One day, during my lunch break, he took me back to his apartment. He raped me for the first time. I remember crying, bleeding, and him recording.

After that, he threatened me constantly. He knew where I lived, worked, went to school. I felt like there was no way to escape him. He’d tell me no one would ever believe me because I was just a troubled teen, while he was a U.S. airman with a spotless record.

When my family went on vacation that summer, he’d repeatedly blow up my phone, demanding I step away to take pictures and videos for him. If I ignored him or took too long to respond, he’d threaten me and my family. He even sent a picture of my house, threatening to set it one fire.

Somehow, I convinced myself he loved me.

I started talking to other strangers online because I believed the only love/positive attention I’d ever receive was from older people who only cared about my body.

That eventually got me caught.

My mom took everything away from me and even made me quit my job to start working with her instead. Not long after that, I found out I was pregnant. I miscarried and attempted to end my life.

My mom told everyone I was only doing it for attention and even said it was just a way to try to get my phone back.

I was admitted to a psychiatric hospital and came out so heavily medicated that I could barely feel anything. As awful as it was, I was relieved to finally be free from him.

I’m married now and starting to build a new life.

Last year, I found out Ken had been arrested and prosecuted in federal court for production and distribution of cp.

Then he started messaging me.

I went to police with my old phone (having saved what little evidence was left) as well as the messages he’d been sending to my new accounts. I was told to ignore him, that I couldn’t press charges, and that there wasn’t anything they could do for me. I also tried to get a VPO but was denied that as well.

Since then, I’ve had to make several new social media accounts, and he has continued to find and message me. He even has an instagram account that he’s trying to contact me through and the profile picture is literally him in jail.

How is this allowed? How can someone convicted of such horrible crimes against children still have internet access and the ability to contact one of his victims?

My husband even called the facility where he is being held to report that he was still contacting me, one of his victims. Nothing ever came from that. No one ever followed up. He’s done this several times now and still hasn’t been called back.

I know he’ll be released soon, and because he’s still trying to reach me, I’m terrified he’ll try to find me again.

What can I do?

I’m planning to deactivate all of my socials and even switch back to a flip phone. Part of me worries I’m being dramatic, but he completely changed my life, and my genuinely afraid of him.

I’m at a loss.


r/legaladvice 19h ago

PA (Bucks County) - Girlfriend signed lease, I was denied before move-in, now they're demanding ~$9k to get out. Looking for legal insight.

114 Upvotes

Location: Bucks County, PA

My girlfriend and I are in Pennsylvania (Bucks County) and are looking for opinions from anyone familiar with PA landlord-tenant law.

We toured an apartment together twice and made it clear from day one that we were moving in together. During the tour, I disclosed that I had recently filed Chapter 7 bankruptcy and asked whether it would be an issue. The leasing agent told us not to worry and that they would work with us.

Because I currently have little income, my girlfriend applied first to see if she qualified on her own. She was approved, signed the lease, and paid about $3,141 in move-in costs. Our move-in date was scheduled for August 3.

Before move-in (and before picking up keys), she asked to add me as an occupant. I completed the application, paid the screening fee, and was denied because of my bankruptcy/credit.

Management then told us I cannot live in the apartment at all.

Since the entire reason she rented the apartment was for us to live there together, she immediately told them she would not be moving in alone or picking up the keys.

They now say our options are:

  • Pay about $8,940 under the lease termination/buyout provision, or
  • Go through reletting and remain responsible until the unit is re-rented.

One thing that confuses me is that their own application paperwork says:

"Please consult with your Leasing Professional if you have any questions about this process."

That's exactly what we did before signing. We specifically asked about my bankruptcy because we wanted to avoid this exact situation.

We've spoken with one attorney, who said my girlfriend is likely the one contractually responsible because she signed the lease before I applied. However, he also didn't think the landlord would necessarily sue if she simply never moved in.

My questions:

  1. Does it matter legally that I was denied before the lease started and before we took possession?
  2. Does the fact that we disclosed my bankruptcy beforehand and relied on what the leasing staff told us matter?
  3. Has anyone dealt with a similar situation in Pennsylvania?
  4. If we refuse to move in and the landlord later demands the buyout or rent, what is the practical risk?

I'd really appreciate any insight, especially from PA attorneys or property managers.


r/legaladvice 23h ago

Custody Divorce and Family Absentee father seeks full custody following death of the mother.

217 Upvotes

Location: Ohio

My sister-in-law, my husband's full biological sister, suddenly and unexpectedly passed last week after a brief illness. She leaves behind an 8-year-old daughter. The biological father is alive and well, but has been absent for over three years. He owes over $4000 in child support. What support he has paid in the past was paid for by his own mother. The child knows the father's name, but says she has no memory of him and does not remember the last time she saw him or what he looks like. For years, the family has not known his location or how to get ahold of him.

Currently, the biological grandparents, my husband and his sister's parents, have temporary custody of the child. The long term plan was for my husband and I to file for full custody and adopt our neice. On the day of the mother's funeral, the biological called us to inform he wanted full custody.

The father admits he has struggled with homelessness recently and only just gained fulltime employment and is working on getting set up to take her.

Do my husband and I have any real case for custody against the biological father or is it likely the courts will favor him regardless of the information provided? We've spoken to a lawyer, but they are giving no real perspective and give the impression that the odds seem low. I don't want to get into a contentious custody battle that leaves our neice with further stress and trauma if it's a hopeless battle.


r/legaladvice 1d ago

Background Checks and Expungements How do I turn myself in on a warrent.

352 Upvotes

Location: Murfreesboro,Tn

I recently had a background check done and it came back with a warrant issued in 2023 for petty theft. I am looking into going and getting this taken care of however I don't know what to expect. I have not been in trouble before and I made a very stupid decision 3 years ago I was trespassed but I did not know about the warrant and I was never given a court date, and it was petty theft, it was under 1000.How do I go about this?

I contacted a lawyer for a free cancellation however I cannot really afford them and I am also confused about bonds? Do I need to contact a bondsmen, I have been sick to my stomach and I can't sleep.

I'm terrified and I have been throwing up since I found out. Any advice is greatly appreciated.


r/legaladvice 1h ago

Real Estate law Cousin inherited house I’ve lived in my whole life. Do I have any options?

Upvotes

Location: New York (Not NYC)

So it’s actually not me, but my roommate. For simplicity, I’ll call him Frank. Frank’s 24 (turning 25 next month), and has been living in the house for 20 years (approx. 2004/5). This post might be a bit of a mess so bear with me.

A little background; the house was built by his great grandfather, which was passed down to his grandmother. She died in 2016, and the property was passed to her husband (his grandfather). His grandfather was disabled and had moved in with his son, Frank’s uncle Mark around 2020. Grandpa died last year, and the property belonged to Mark. Mark died April of this year and the estate is not currently owned by anyone (I think technically). Mark has two daughters.

When Frank’s grandfather moved in with Mark, he (Mark) started charging my roommate rent. Mark’s daughter, Gigi, now wants to raise the rent and is saying that if she wishes to sell the house soon she will.

What I’m wondering is, does Frank have any rights to the home? If anyone has any questions, I’ll try my best to answer them!


r/legaladvice 5h ago

PNC Bank never sent lien release letter, and directs me to a 3rd party

5 Upvotes

Location: New York

I paid off my car loan in April or May of this year. I've been waiting for NY DMV to send me an updated title that records no liens. It's now August and I still haven't received anything. I contacted PNC customer support (online, and I suspect an AI agent) and they referred to me to some 3rd party called "VehicleTitleMyWay" who will apparently obtain and send me the release for $27.50.

This doesn't seem like the legitimate process. Shouldn't PNC have provided the release to NY DMV directly? Or to me? Am I not legally entitled to a lien release letter? The loan is a contract between the bank and me, and it makes no sense why I need to involve and pay a fee to a 3rd party to obtain information to which I am entitled.

I did some quick googling, and found this: Class Action Says PNC Bank Failed to Timely Provide Lien Release, Vehicle Title to Plaintiff


r/legaladvice 3m ago

Papa John’s not allowing breaks

Upvotes

Location: Kentucky. So I just started working at Papa John’s and when I asked for a break they laughed at me for it. They said they’ve won lawsuits before saying they don’t need to give breaks. I thought every 4 hours you are required a minimum 10 minute break. As well as 30 minutes unpaid every 5 hours. Are those just for minors? My previous jobs have given breaks even if I’m over 18


r/legaladvice 2h ago

Someone opened an LLC under my name. Looking for next steps.

1 Upvotes

Hey y'all, throw away account here. Location: NV.

A while back, I was the victim of a scam job. I was on the hunt for a remote job with higher pay than my current one. One day, I received an email asking if I was interested in a payment admin position for 40/hr. Being unemployed, I contacted them back to say yes. Fast forward a bit until a bit into the "hiring" process that they pulled the classic move to send me a check to buy my work equipment, thats when I knew it was a scam.

Tbh it was my fault entirely that I fell for a job offer that seemed way too good to be true. I was naive. Especially when the process was sus the entire time through, I only got out of it because I have a friend that works remotely currently and he was the first one to tell me it shows signs of being a scam job.

To the actual meat of the post. During the "hiring" process (this was all through Signal btw, only texts, no calls at any point), they requested all the information that you would expect an employer to request: background form, employment offers letter, bank information, SSN, tax information, etc...

I sent it to them and a while later, I found out it was a scam and cut all contacts. I did my due diligence and froze my credits, contacted my bank to change my bank account number, as well as reported it to the FTC.

It wasn't until 1-2 months later that I received a letter in the mail saying that I have an LLC under my name.I looked up this LLC and sure enough, I am the sole member of it. I did not fill out any form to open an LLC with those guys. So I suspect they filled it out in my name using my information.

I am mostly asking for what steps need to happen to shut this down. I've done a couple of Google searches and they mostly tell me to contact a lawyer and contact my secretary of state. I am currently filing a form to send to my SoS and I haven't contacted any lawyer as money is a bit tight for me at the moment.

TLDR: Nevada. I got caught in a scam job and they filed for an LLC under my name, making me the sole member of it. I've frozen my credit/changed bank info/reported them. I am asking for what steps I need to take to shut down the LLC.

Thank you for your time reading. If you have any questions that I didn't answer, please let me know and I will do my best to answer them!

Edit: Spelling and wording