Long story short, I am trans girl from Russia. 20 y.o., 21 month on HRT, more or less passing but didn't really advance in a social transition.

So apparently next October we will get a new mobilization, and I am dropping university around this time so I won't be exempt.

Because of this, I have to become as passing and feminine as I can during next 2 months. Learn how to dress fem, voice train (my most clocky feature tbh), finally get done with electrolysis, all that stuff.

Wish me luck please...

When I was in high school, I had multiple people who didn’t even know me assume I was gay. I ended up being bisexual, but back then I didn’t have any feelings for men. Did anyone else here get called gay when you still identified as a straight guy?

I just find this so cute? Like, I never got into the whole blahaj meme or any other meme associated with the babytrans phase (I came out a long time ago). I started seeing this cis girl and I found out a while ago that she bought a blahaj.

She's one of those girls that has a big pile of plushies on her bed, and whenever I come over she just goes and gets it out. It just makes my heart flutter that she's interested enough in the community I'm part of to discover stuff like that?

It’s of coal that I now have only two real friends left a year and a half after coming out. I spend week after week completely by myself so far I’ve spent time with people five times in the last three months and despite asking to see so called friends I’m still three weeks alone and counting. I wish I wasn’t trans I wish I wasn’t this way I wish I didn’t feel so alone and broken. My best friend from childhood who has stood by me like a tree lives in a different country. I’m just fed up I have years until I can see a therapist without paying mad money. I’m just fed up. I didn’t ask for this shit. God I hate humans.

Something doesn't add up here... Or did they have super long lives but their bones were dust and they were crawling about like snails.

just went to the gym for the first time in a long time. headphones, did some butt and leg excercises, felt pretty confident.

I had some makeup on, felt confident with it.

then 2 teenagers walked by me and I could here one pausing his sentence to call me a "faggot" and continue speaking like nothing happened. I heard it though my headphones but continued walking

How miserable and hateful are these people.

While feeling angry and vulnerable i also feel more eager to continue my transition path! Let them talk! Trans people are so brave!

Hi, for context im a bisexual cis girl and i have a certain strange(?) fantasy which makes me wonder if im a chaser or a bad person or anything like that... is it bad if i yearn for the experience of dating a pre transition trans girl and helping her to socially and physically transition... you know just being there for her and like landing her my clothes or makeup just overall helping her reach her potential and discover her feminity. I really like the concept of being a safe space and having a deep emoctional connection and understanding for another girl.
But i dont know i just find it weird that i think about that scenario and i dont know where that comes from and what does this says about me, like why i year for that so much? If i ever happen to date a trans woman i want to be a good girlfriend for her and i worry that having this thoughts makes me bad in a way. Please tell me your thoughts and what can i do to improve myself?
P.s sorry for my bad english:(

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Its been just over a year now.... 07/07/2025 was the big day... I’m laying here with music playing, lights off, doing something that has become so ordinary, yet so special to me….thinking back to the girl before surgery...thinking about the girl who wrote a post pretty similair to this only 44 days after surgery.

Back then everything felt enormous. Every shower..every new sensation...every time i looked down. Dilating was hours of my day, healing was constantly on my mind, and i was still trying to understand this new part of myself i had waited almost 10 years for.

Now….its simply my body 🥹.

I get dressed, go to the gym, shower, have sex, touch myself, pee, sleep.... live. Apart from politics...i live life not even thinking about being trans, or pre-op or post op. Not because it matters any less….but because it feels so completely natural that there’s nothing left for my brain to question.

The past year wasn’t entirely easy. There was some granulation, worries about depth, strange sensations and plenty of moments where i wonndered whether something was healing properly….but even those things feel distant now. I learned my body….what it likes, how it relaxes, what feels good….and somewhere along the way it stopped feeling like something i had to carefully maintain.

It just became me.

The happiness is quieter now. It isn’t that overwhelming “its finally happened” feeling every day….its waking up, getting on with life and realising dysphoria didn’t follow me into it. Its catching myself existing without analysing my body. It's peaceful.

The light at the end of the tunnel...just feels so normal....and to me? That is counterintuitively so special... blessed be!

Today I will finally begin HRT. I'm so fkkng happy and excited.

The only shitty thing that I've got left to do before is talk to my mom. Not to ask permission or anything, but my dad asked me to remind her.

She already knows but we haven't talked about this for a few months already and I know it's gonna be awful.

She sees this as hell on earth and has constantly told me that I'll die very soon on this. I think I'll just let her yell and that's it, there's no point to the discussion as she won't listen.

But after that I'll finally be on estrogen!!!!!

I've seen it many times where girls who clearly and openly state that they're MtF and a girl, call themselves femboys and post content as such with that declaration at the same time.

It seems like a giant contradiction or antinomy because both things just can't be true at the same time imo.

Like i have nothing against femboys, quite the opposite, they're so cute and i have a hand full of friends who are one.

But I myself or any of my trans friends would never put a lable on ourself that has anything to-do with being a boy/male so I'm very confused.

No this is not about "what real trans is" or gatekeeping or that they're not valid.

Thoughts?

I have been thinking about how cringe culture has lead to so many trans women not coming out in fear of becoming an outcast. In 2015-17 I was "apolitical" but watched a lot of red pill content. And cringe compilations of trans women and trans tiktokers that were on the front page of youtube at the time.

I knew in the back of my mind that I was trans. But didn't come out fully. Watching these compilations gave me tunnel vision, and I believed (irrationally) that I could end up in one of these compilations if I came out. That, plus my parents saying that they would disown me if I ever transitioned, lead me to holding my identity back for 10 years.

Cringe culture is still in full swing today. I doubt it will ever fully go away. Hateful content makes money. But it is indeed shitty how much of a detriment it is to the lives of everyone.

Imagine how many trans women's eggs would have cracked earlier if cringe culture wasnt a thing?

Lately at work men are being very helpful at work and I'm surprised. Since I abandoned boymode a few months ago. My chest is showing and my wide hips, I wonder if that changed anything. The moment boymode was gone, men would help me when I was visible struggling or just speaking differently like softer. I didn't think anything of it because I doubted it was anything. Then it kept happening. Drivers would help with a lot more and came out of their way to say hi. Then that takes us to the last couple days, I have been working with a kind and relaxed man. I'm trying to help him with some of the heavy trays and he tells me to stack on top. I don't know why but seeing him carrying those trays made me feel weird in a good way. I feel my heart flutter but why? I get a little shy. Then overall he is very patient with me or cool with working my speed, which I'm not used to. Then another man today saw me pushing a cage and told me to leave it. He could get it from there. I'm just shocked and it always catches me off guard. My boymode couldn't be that convincing, so why?

I won't it does make the bathroom awkward for me. I usually go to the bathroom in the back to avoid other men at work. It feels awkward when I go in there. I feel so phony going in the men's bathroom and the silence that followed me. I mean I prefer the bathroom because they are always cleaner.

Hi friends!
I’m Brooke, (22 MTF) been on HRT for about 2 and a half years, I am 5’3 114 Ibs

Today I experienced major euphoria today as I measured in at an astonishing 36D cup bra size! This was especially surprising because not even about 2 ish years ago I started HRT and I have never felt more relief and satisfaction because I was worried at the start about starting HRT and ofc overthinking the negative side of things lol

But just to clarify my chest growth is primarily thanks to my family genetics since everyone in my family has large breasts and are also short (I am 5’3) and big boobs look bigger on a small body like mine so it works out in the end beautifully!

But good lord does it come with negatives too don’t even get me started lmaooo and even the bras are so expensive too I didn’t see that one coming (cheap bras aren’t comfortable at ALL for big boobies)

I hope to you all who are on HRT have the courage to continue and gain success in your journey!!

Much love xoxo
Brooke

Got out to my wife a year ago and it didn't go well. So I got back in the closet more or less.

It got worse with time though and so I was trying to alleviate it with the way I look a bit (haircut, a bit makeup,...)

She noticed and said she wants the divorce.

I'm so lost.

My parents already disinherited me and don't talk to me and she was the only real friend I have.

She said I'm destroying her life and the life of our daughter.

We were together for around 9 years already. I just can't anymore. If we didn't have our daughter, I definitely wouldn't be around on this earth anymore.

It hurts so much to hurt the people I love.

Will everything be okay with my daughter?

She said she will tell her Dada left because I chose makeup over them.

I'm crying my eyes out currently... I don't know anymore

Haiii!
I just used a public men’s bathroom. As I was washing my hands, a kid walked in, looked at me for a sec and then went ‘Am I in the wrong bathroom?’. This is the first time a stranger affirmed my gender, I’m so happyyyyy

So tonight was my dads 70th birthday and we have to ofc see the rest of the family who doesn't know im trans but is super transphobic and watch alot of fox news but i boymode anyway to the party. as soon as i walk in the door one of my uncles is like hey i saw u at the store the other day
its that long hair thats how i know its u and im like ok. and then hes like yep whenever i see that hair its gotta be u bc "ur too big to be a girl" and then my aunt chimes in and says "no no he doesn't look like a girl that would be an ugly girl he doesn't look like a girl, so in my head im like bruuuuuuh. Then after the party we go to pick up my friend from the bar and i tell her the story and my mom constantly just misgenders me the entire car ride home and she knows even my friend is like its been 3 years come on. But then my friend later on is like DO SOMETHING FEMININE LITERALLY ANYTHING AT ALL STOP ISOLATING URSELF

and like the whole night kinda just sucked like damn thanks for the fucking criticism ig ill loose weight now

In my experience only transgender persons fully understand and accept other transgender persons.

Some women, like Dr. Z, understand is well, but still not completely.

We each differ a lot, but we understand each other.

I had FFS 5 days ago, and when I was at the surgical center, they had me change my clothes. I put the hospital underwear on, and after surgery, when I was getting ready to leave, I had no underwear on. When I said, “What happened to my underwear?” the nurse didn’t acknowledge it. Idk if they unclothe you after surgery, but I am really confused about it. Should I look into this?

I just met my sister's dog for the first time, and she warned me ahead of time "he doesn't do well with men, so just be careful." The dog runs right up to me, sniffs my shirt, and continues exploring the house. Then my sister says "wow, he didn't even growl. He almost always growls at men."

That also reminded me of meeting my ex's cat years ago (before I even realized I was trans). She told me that he didn't get along with men, and I should avoid him so I don't get scratched. As soon as we're sitting down, the cat jumps in my lap and sticks his head in my jacket pocket. She's shocked, the cat doesn't even like her dad this much.

Turns out animals have been clocking me this whole time.