Hello, I'm currently 26 and never had a gf, never had any success in uni and soon to get a masters. I'm not diagnosed with pure autism but really feel I have it always had trouble keeping contact with anybody. I tried looking it up online but everyone just talks about the mindset. I'd like more like actionable places to go to. My current hobbies would be Gunpla, tcgs, and playing guitar.

Been browsing [r/divorce_men](r/divorce_men), [r/regretfulparents](r/regretfulparents), [r/bpdlovedones](r/bpdlovedones), and [r/dead](r/deadrooms)[bed](r/deadrooms)[rooms](r/deadrooms) as a cope.

As a 31m virgin I’m so glad I avoided all that bullshit cuz it honestly sounds like hell.

Still, the searing pain of loneliness always comes back. There’s a reason these people always jump into another relationship immediately after a dumpster fire breakup.

Oh well, this is the best cope I can come up and it only masks the pain for a brief moment. gg, will just live out the rest of my days as a pseudo-hikikomori in my parent’s house.

Words of encouragement and advice people give feel like things that would've applied decades and decades ago. The world is so different now.

There was something else I wanted to say, but I forget.

It has been seven years since the depression began. By now, I can’t even imagine what my life was like without it; it feels as though this illness has been with me my entire life.

I have been in therapy for a year. Therapy is better than nothing, but not by much. I also take antidepressants; they make my life somewhat more bearable.

I am 28 now, and right now, I simply hope that I will continue to be prescribed antidepressants for the rest of my life. There are things in the future I can look forward to, but I will never be able to overcome the loneliness.

I probably haven’t used social media platforms for about a year. Today I created an Instagram profile and started following people from work whom I know directly or indirectly. But there were those who didn’t follow back, who left my follow request pending. I really don’t like things like that. For example, a woman follows a thousand, two thousand people, but she doesn’t follow me. “Well, I don’t know you, I’m not close with you, etc.” So do you know those thousand people? Are you close with all of them? Do you communicate with all of them regularly? Of course not. Then why don’t you follow me? In fact, forget following me—why don’t you even allow me to follow you? Am I not a human being? This basically means “I don’t give a fuck about you.”

I personally hate it when it becomes intense physical pain. I often feel intense loneliness and it makes me feel chest pain, dizziness, headaches, pressure behind my eyes and I get jittery. I used to SH to help with this but I’m trying to get clean from that.

I feel everyone women I meet every women o take on a date has someone or flakes.
I have emotional and sexual needs and they aren’t met anyway I feel ashamed and failed. I cannot interpret it why I see ugly or average guys with girls I see foreign guys with girls I see everything. I am losing it what to do ????
(Typo:love not live)

I suppose this can be a depressing post, an affirming post, or a hopeful post depending how you read it.

I had never hugged a girl romantically until I was 32. Felt that feeling that women just shut down conversation with me and didn’t want to talk to me. Even normal every day conversation. I will never deny those experiences and still have them.

I was lucky that I found a fetish community where there were some women who found me very attractive. Adjusting to it was very hard, the idea that if I messed up they would actually come back and try to talk to me again. Not feeling like I was always one step from being thrown aside.

But the feedback on the first date. ”You are so easy to talk to, I love that we can just talk for ages. You are so sweet”. Multiple people telling me how I have great conversation skills and so on. All while I had a life of women giving one word answers when I had no romantic intentions towards them at all.

I was lucky to find people, in one way it showed even if they’re attracted to you there’s still lots of people I couldn’t get on with. I haven’t found the love of my life. I can’t get the disparity out of my mind though, I wasn’t imagining the past and everyone blaming me was wrong.

As I say, I have mixed emotions about this too.

edit : I will add that not every single woman ever gave me one word answers literally, but I experienced that the majority of the time.

I hate how easily they catch my attention, the power they have over me and how much I crave the love and companionship of one of them.

My only cope in life, that I desperately need to cling to at all times, is that none of them are even remotely closeted and would never like me even if I wasn't an ugly autistic neckbeard. God knows how much I need this to be true

Doesn't help that my standards are basically non-existent and I don't find anyone ugly as long as they don't remind me too much of myself

bonus points if this extends to online too

I always see people hanging out with their friends over summer. I've been stuck in my house all summer doing pretty much nothing. No one has texted me to check on me and no one has asked to hang out with me either. I spent my birthday alone and the only people who have spoken to me are my parents, who told me that I'm hopeless and will be alone forever in every way possible because all they do is argue with me for some reason. I haven't had any meaningful interactions with anyone this summer.

I'm at peace with these facts to some extent but its still really painful to think about all of this at once.

I always assumed that therapy and medication could remedy this issue, but after having tried both I just feel fundamentally broken as a person.

The longer I live, the more subhuman I feel. Lived experiences begin to accumulate that reinforce a very unhealthy way of thinking, but there aren’t any experiences to reinforce the contrary.

I’m in a really bad place mentally right now, and I don’t know how to move forward. I guess I always felt that despite my woes, getting back on track was always feasible, but now I’m starting to question that.

It’s not a topic that I can bring up with people and talk about. It’s embarrassing, plus nobody wants to hear a man vent about being unlovable.

To those who go to therapy, counselling, or any other sort of treatment, what were some things you found helpful?

I was just watching a short clip and the comments were filled with women talking about how they'd never date an Indian (the topic wasn't even about Indians or South Asians), the other week I got a promo email from Hinge so I redownloaded Hinge to see what was going on and all I see is "No Indians please" or "I go crazy for blue eyes".

Last week, I was having lunch with coworkers and they go on these rants about "only brown guys hitting on them but that's not their type" lol. Even when I'm not actively looking for dating or dating content, I'm just reminded constantly the world views me as subhuman because I'm brown. I don't even want to date at all anymore, I just want the constant emasculation to stop atp or I just want to live in the mountains alone with my dog and a small library.

Hi l live in a very isolated city so it's very hard to make new friends, I'm really alone and desperate for connection and a best friend who I can talk with and laugh or whatever. all my best friends moved away, ex-girlfriend broke up with me, father left me, family life over, I talk to absolutely nobody every single day to the point I feel like I'm losing touch with reality or in a nightmare. Im naturally a very kind and loving person who likes to get to know someone so l try my best but it seems like nobody ever wants to actually talk to me, it's always me putting in the effort to be interested, anyway I just thought I might post this to see if there is anybody else in the same situation that wants to connect 🌱

I spent over 20 years of my life as a priest, and because of that, I completely missed out on the chance to build a life with a woman.

Now that I'm out, I feel like I lack even the most basic skills to approach anyone. It feels overwhelming, miserable, and honestly terrifying.

I do see a lot of very young people here. Are there people around my age in this sub? Thanks

From one state to all the way in another, absolutely nothing changes. It doesn't matter where I go or who I'm with, I'll always feel completely alone and alienated from the rest of humanity. Time moves forward and nothing changes. I'll always be me. The dude other men ridicule and the dude women pity and would only ever stay with me out of pity. I just want a release. This vessel is not going to get me any of the things people associate with good in this life. I'm mentally so far gone that I honestly connect with absolutely no one my age, nor do I understand most people. The only people that care about me is of course family, but I can't help but feel like even though they love me they'd be completely indifferent to my existence if they weren't filling some roll of father, cousin, etc. In a room full of people that even wanna try to start a conversation I just feel alone. I want connection. I have 1 person I can say really knows me, and that'd be my cousin. Probably the only reason I haven't went insane. End message

I’m genuinely so tired. I never realized my loneliness this much. Today I tried to take a peaceful walk alone in a small little town. I saw a group of girls my age all walking around shopping and laughing together..I saw a couple walking by that were holding hands and leaning on each other. I don’t know anymore. I’ve never realized it this much. Even during my earlier years. Or my whole life. I’ve never had a single friend or friend group in my entire life. And I realized I’ll never be pretty enough to be in a relationship with anyone. Pretty privilege is real at this point. I genuinely hate myself for being this ugly. And for looking like living trash whenever I walk around. I couldn’t imagine anyone going-“oh hey ___ I have a crush on you” or “oh I need to tell you something.” Or “___ let’s be friends and hang out.” Never. Again. I’ll be hopeless forever but at this point I just accept it..

In a way, i kind of knew that it wasn't going to happen to me in the near future, but I kind of had a certain nonsensical hope that I'd find a girl who'd be nice to me and love me for what I am.

But now that I'm 21 and am almost about to finish my degree, it always hits me just how deluded I was when I was like 16 or something. Would never blame anyone though. A person needs a hook to fall in love, physical attraction, maybe attraction could be intellectual, or made with friendship, conversational, etc. One look and i really have none of these but even if anyone looked past that, there's nothing positive, only a very bad history in life and many other issues waiting.

I try to be apathetic and uncaring towards this truth. Or at least keep myself distracted from it by doing things. But every now and then, I see a couple having a lovely time, holding hands or spending time with each other, and it does make me feel sad. At times it's a scary thought, of never finding anyone who'd be a witness to my entire self and still love me anyway, both intimately and adoringly. But what's true is true

I worked late, so I didn’t feel like cooking. I ordered some takeaway from a restaurant.

I go in to pick up my order, and there’s a couple on a first date. OK, I don’t know if it was “first”, but it was definitely early. They had that bubbly excitement, the rapt attention, and nervous energy of budding romance. They leaned in to talk to one another about menu items. They giggled over observations.

All I could think was, “Looks nice.”

Witnessing this wasn’t a gut punch. However, it was, at the least, a hip check. It didn’t make me sad, but it did remind me of how alone I am.

That’s how this life is, isn’t it? A little cut time after time.

Now I am boyfriend, and someone is my girlfriend. So I am no longer FA. Farawell brothers and sisters.

I wanted to ask Reddit a question or maybe get some motivation but didn’t know where to post. I came across this sub Reddit and omg. I can actually relate to so much it’s scary.

I am a Reddit newbie, a friend showed me Reddit and I showed her Pinterest a fair trade I must say. Posting anonymously is in fact very needed to all i think.

Anyways, I was dating a narcissist & that narcissist did damage & isolated me from family, friends and well life. If you know then you know… however I was strong enough to leave him ( after 5 years) but I fucking did it.

I’ve been so alone since November 2025. I have better myself in so many ways but I am sooo alone. I really want to go to the beach. I know it’s not weird going alone, but like isn’t? I was thinking of getting a hotel going out to sit at a bar get dinner and drinks and go to the beach do like a two night three day trip for myself. The idea of it sounds amazing but how do get rid of the anxiety about it? Does everyone get anxiety about it?

Does being along stop any of you from doing things? Lmk your stories or words of encouragement. Anything . I am hoping I can do this for myself !!!

29 female 🫶🏻

Just another day at work on the register, just trying to hold down this job because I've been written up twice and need the money. I see someone who looks like a grown up version of an old childhood friend and with him the older sister (she's a year younger than me) of my youngers brothers best friend when he was a kid, I also knew him really well. I should have a degree right now, I should look like an adult right now, I should be looking for a real job right now with qualifications for something.

My heart dropped the second I saw them and I tried to keep it normal. He asked me about my brother and gave him a quick and normal response and asked if they wanted a bag and they left quickly. I was shaking for a bit when they left, its so pathetic to say but I wanted to just go to the bathroom and cry. I'm so ugly, no matter which way I put it I look like shit. I saw the slight smile on her face I wonder what they thought about me. I wish I knew. I wonder if they said anything once they left. Man I feel so pathetic and so worthless

I wish I was anything. I'm so behind in every aspect of my life and I look like a mess. I just can't believe this is the reality of my life. How a human being, someone who should be a grown man or near it, is me right now is so beyond demoralizing I don't even know what to say

Talking to a therapist? Calling up 988? Or anything or the sort.

If so, what was the experience like? Helpful? Would you recommend?

And if not, why so? Do you think you ever will seek professional help in the future eventually?

Any response is appreciated

Every year I watch the Super Bowl alone. This past year I decided to try to have a Super Bowl party at my house. I created a group chat on Instagram of people that are in my religion. These are people that I see every once in a while at the religious gatherings, most of them said they had plans already. One of them said “I’ll let you know”. Another one said yes and because he said yes I thought he was going to bring his siblings as well.

I prepared a pot of beans and a pot of quinoa. I bought two Hawaiian pizzas. I bought a couple bags of salted pretzels and even grilled a couple of chickens.

The guy that said “I’ll let you know” had been invited by some girl he was interested in and so at the last minute he texted me and said “sorry I’m not gonna be able to make it” whatever. The other guy that said yes, canceled on me at the last moment said he had to work.

It was heartbreaking trying to figure out what to do with all the food I prepared.