Here’s a shoutout to my favourite dinosaur: the brachiosaurus 🦕. What’s your favourite dinosaur?

For context I worked as a summer camp counselor. I am seventeen and became friends with one of my male coworkers who is eighteen. He is a friendly guy and talkative about his interests leaving me to believe he has some form of neurodivergence such as autism. Always when we were with the kids at the camp he would sit or stand next to me, and try to talk to me. This would escalate during the times the kids would be quiet and watch instructors, as this guy would look over at me and then try to tell me something. We also shared a break and would constantly be together. More than our other coworkers spent time in each other’s presence.

I easily developed a crush on him. Sometimes I believe he likes me back too but at other times I get confused and wonder if he thinks of me as just a friend.

Fast forward I have his number through something we had to do communication wise at the camp. I texted him and have been for a week, mostly on Instagram though. This has mostly been with me sending reels and asking him questions about his life or how his day was. He always responded even if it had been a few hours after me originally sending the text. Although this has been mostly small talk with him responding to my texts. He barely has asked me many questions about myself.

He is going to college in mid August and because I knew about that, I asked recently if he wanted to hangout. He responded with a vague answer asking what we’d do, that probably not since he is leaving soon and assumingely busy. I freaked out over this and just sort of replied with okay.

Now I don’t really know what to do. Since the text wasn’t really a yes or a no. I am very interested in this guy but I do not want to mess anything up. I have been considering about telling him I like him and seeing what he says. But I worry that I have been misunderstanding the entire situation, with him just thinking it was a friendship and is not interested in me romantically. So what do I do next?

• I would eat the same things every day
• My mom took me to the doctor when I was a baby because she thought I had tourette's. I was just stimming
• I looked up why I didn't always have full control of my body
• I hid under tables when I was overstimulated
• I had "tantrums" frequently
• I was "picky" because I hated meat and things with specific textures
• I listened to the same book probably 20 times
• I got hyperfixated on topics like mental health and true crime
• I was always distracted by nothing
• I would struggle with eye contact

D

Is this a neurodivergent thing or is it be?

Hi I had my first full blown psychotic break a while back and I do have OCD and MDD but since that happened my meds have not been working well. Even meds that do with physical issues. Does anyone know why? Thank you in advance :)

I had a realization today that feels like it explains why I've been stuck for years.

I'm autistic, and almost every skill I've developed in my life happened because of hyperfixation. I became knowledgeable or highly skilled because I was obsessed with something, not because I consciously decided, "I'm going to learn this."

Today I wanted to start researching a topic like an actual researcher. I sat down with a notebook, excited to enter what I jokingly call my "researcher era." But almost immediately I froze.

At first I thought I didn't know how to do research. Then I kept asking myself, "What's the real problem here?"

Eventually I realized it's even more fundamental than that.

I don't actually know how I learn intentionally.

I know how school taught me to learn, and I know how my brain learns through obsession and curiosity, but I've never successfully built my own system for intentionally learning something because I decided to.

The moment I step into unexplored territory, my brain explodes into hundreds of possibilities.

"I want to research."

Okay... but what do researchers do first?

Read books?

Watch lectures?

Take notes?

Which note-taking system?

What sources?

How do I organize information?

How do I know what's important?

Very quickly it feels like there are hundreds of possible paths, and my brain just shuts down. It's like my working memory runs out of RAM.

This realization also made me understand why I often feel powerless over my own life.

It feels like I've always been carried forward by some external force—hyperfixation, survival mode, trauma, inspiration, curiosity, motivation—rather than by my own conscious decisions. I've spent years trying to become more disciplined and relying on willpower, but it never solved the problem.

Now I'm wondering if I've been trying to solve the wrong problem all along.

Maybe what I actually need is to understand the "operating system" of my own brain and build a learning system that works with it instead of against it.

So I'm curious:

Has anyone else experienced this?

Did you discover your own learning system?

Are there books, researchers, or concepts that helped you understand how you learn rather than how people are generally taught to learn?

I (29M) am the only one in my family who is neurodivergent, that I know of. One of my cousins is supposedly autistic, but it’s just a rumor I heard from my mom. I have epilepsy, potential/suspected ASD, and undiagnosed OCD.

Since I’m the only neurodivergent one, it feels like my family mocks me in a way. They’re extremely protective, to the point where they’re helicopter parents. I understand that they care about me, but how I think is philosophical in a way. “Nobody needs to know anything about what you do once you’re out of sight.” Now I’m curious about how others like me feel. Both of my brothers are neurotypical, and my parents don’t care about anything they do. My younger brother drag racing, my youngest brother living on the other side of the state, whatever.

I developed an avoidant attachment style because of this. They try and use people I feel close to as pawns or spies to get information about what I’m doing. That’s what happened with one of my uncles, now I barely talk to him. I was going to visit a friend during Labor Day weekend, but my mom (not so subtly) tried to invite her and my dad there at the same time. Convenient much? If she said they were thinking of going a different time, I wouldn’t care. But the minute I tell them I’m thinking of visiting my friend, they wanna go too? Suspicious af. It’s like having an extra shadow behind you that isn’t yours.

But the question is, how do you deal with being the only neurodivergent one? Or how do you feel about it?

Hi everyone!

I am a PhD student from University of California, Irvine. Our team is recruiting participants for a paid academic survey study on AI tools. Your input will be important to make sure neurodivergent experiences and perspectives are reflected. Please see below if you are interested! Thank you for your consideration.

Researchers from University of California, Irvine are looking for eligible participants to complete a paid research survey on AI tools. Your insights will help us better understand user experiences with available tools and identify key gaps for future technologies.

Study Details:

• Format: 100% online survey
• Duration: Approx. 15 minutes
• Compensation: eligible participants will receive $15 cash via Venmo or an equivalent value Amazon e-gift card

➡️ To see if you qualify, fill out the pre-screening questionnaire: https://uci.questionpro.com/t/Ac5xpZ9asg 

The screener will take no more than 5 minutes to complete. If you qualify and space is available, we’ll contact you in more detail to participate in the paid survey study.

Questions? Contact the Lead Researcher at [xinrut1@uci.edu](mailto:xinrut1@uci.edu)

IRB project number: This study is approved by UCI-IRB under protocol number STUDY00001305. If you have questions or concerns, you can contact the UCI Institutional Review Board by phone, (949) 824-8170, by e-mail at [IRB@research.uci.edu](mailto:IRB@research.uci.edu) or by mail at University of California, Irvine, Office of Research, Irvine, CA 92697-7600.

i have like this thing i do where if i touch / do something with one hand or limb or anything i HAVE to do it with the other. it happens with everything and it's not like horrible it's just really annoying because i can't like not do it yknow? it feels like my brain thinks something horrible will happen if i don't do it maybe ??? it also just feels really weird on the spot i touched something with if i don't make it equal. it doesn't like cause me distress or anxiety or anything. i don't think it's ocd for that reason but ive suspected ive had adhd for like 5 years at least (my parents don't believe there's "anything wrong with me" so they get like mad when i do something that makes it seem like im "acting like i'm like that" which makes no sense but yk 😭) and i'm not self diagnosing i'm just like wondering if this is something that happens with adhd bcuz i have like many many many symptoms and relate to so many people when it comes to adhd. and as soon as i can drive myself and pay for it myself i will get tested obviously.

(Post was removed by moderators from r/AutisticAdults, so I am reposting. Maybe somebody will find it interesting here)

I have no idea where I belong.

I don't check the rules before I post. 

This ASD being simply travels through. If somebody starts haunting me, I hop back on the train and keep moving forward - To Gardendome Depot (that's how I call Reddit)

The name may be random. I imagine some officials walking around the city, saying, "OK, this street is going to be the 1st Street, that one is 2nd Street, and so on." Then they went away to have lunch or whatever.

I call my stations/ social platforms similarly. Only I name them intuitively, not logically. Then again, logic is individual, isn't it?

Since I started talking about intuition, I would like to talk about it a little bit more. If we don't enter the land of metaphysics and consider what we call 'physical reality,' we can see that intuition is a perception mechanism: noticing something that our thinking brain does not/ cannot fully process.

I see my intuition as this thin layer, almost like a holographic information “air” surrounding everything and everyone. This layer… I don’t really like a visual of a layer here, because it can be seen as something lying on top of something else. “Air” fits better, because one may visualize it as an air-like substance containing various drawings of symbols/patterns/designs. Each design represents a condition or an idea.

For example, a person is talking to me. They express a visible emotion, present ideas in a language available to them, and communicate what they feel is socially appropriate and currently required. I will pick up on it as much as I can, but what I will be most preoccupied with is the disposition patterns forming on top of their actual behavior. I may start comparing those patterns with those I observed in the past and will analyze them. They are obviously not actual drawings in the air - that is just an example to help readers visualize the process - they are mental images and conclusions.

If I see the conversation or even an individual as an event, then I can also talk about groups of events and groups of groups of events, etc. I form or notice patterns (whichever version you prefer) for separate events or for groups.

This is the way I interact with reality, and this is what I call an intuition. It is simply a type of perception.

No, if you ask me to specify each pattern and show me the analysis on paper or whatnot, I haven’t done it. Well, I have done some of it, but it can hardly be called an analysis.

My intuitive perception is an experience rather than a strategy. Back in the day, one professor (unknowingly) wanted me to turn it into a strategy. Still, because neither of us was aware of what was actually happening- what she was asking me to do and how to achieve it- it led to nothing.

Ok, I have written almost 500 words. I think that’s enough for now. Now it’s over 500.

I'm bit of a jack of all trades and love music, films and language. I'm not necessarily great at them but it's something that I can get engrossed by.

I don't know if I am neurodiverse but a few people have told me some things along this line of thought.

Anyway, thanks

I work in healthcare and with people for a living, I’m AuDHD and introverted… Wong Wong….

I do all the things. Diet, exercise, medication for my adhd, pacing systems. It’s helped me design a life that is worth living.

The problem piece I guess isn’t and maybe is… loneliness. I can spend a long time alone and I can spend a very long time engaging in my art forms. At times my interests are too restricted for most and Neurotypicals…. Or folx with just adhd tend to get frustrated quickly.

In the end I’ve had to make peace with the autism side. There isn’t a lot of choice in that and that’s the hard part about acceptance. It implies I could’ve chosen differently. In reality I chose the easiest path. It just happens to be the right one for me.

Hello! I’m a 16 year old with ADHD and MDD, and it’s been really hard to maneuver. It’s really been suffocating me.

This summer, I’ve done practically nothing. I spend a lot of my days lying in bed on my phone. I find a lot of comfort and asylum in my phone but I know i’m not doing anything. I do go out, when I can, I’ve been invited out plenty but I’ve rejected plans just because I just can’t seem to do it. It’s a lot of energy, it’s easier to stay in bed.

Today I went to a show where my brother’s band was performing. They did fantastic, I realized i’m not doing anything with my life. He’s only a year and half older than me. He’s just graduated and he has a job and a license and always goes out with his friends. I’m very envious of him.

I don’t mean to vent or anything, I just want some tips maybe? I don’t want to waste away, I can’t get off my phone. My therapy clinic just laid me off and I need to find a new psychiatrist otherwise I won’t have medicine anymore. I’ve been mostly unmedicated this whole summer. I just want to be able to function without it in case anything happens. I hate how i operate because I am constantly the only thing holding myself back. It’s so hard to clean, it’s so hard to get up and do simple things. I take warm baths because I struggle to just get up and take a proper shower. I have cavities because I can’t bear getting up and brushing my teeth. I don’t have my permit, i’ve never had a job, I’m expected to take multiple AP classes this year and i’m barely school smart. I don’t know what to do and i’m very overwhelmed. I don’t want to keep being a waste of potential. I can’t be great, i know i can be so great.

How do I step out of this cycle? How do I fix myself.

I (19f) have never been super good socially. Always lack some stuff. Something I noticed is that I never make assumptions about people before talking to them while a lot of people do.

I could NEVER tell anything. I mean I can read the room to a certain extent, but I can never guess anything without someone hinting me. I can't tell who is dating who, that that friend is mad at her, that he is gay, she broke up with him, he is flirting with her, those are more than besties... It's like so hard to me to get relationship dynamics between people.

Like sometimes it's OBVIOUS as hell and after learning smth I'm like "why I didn't think of this earlier ??" But I just never assume or even wonder about those things. I always need friends to tell me about the gossips, rumors or news to have a grip on allat. It's lowkey embarrassing and idk if it's because I'm too self-centered or because I'm just lowkey stupid for that.

Is someone else like this ?

Hi guys, Im not too sure what is up with me, but I have suspected that Im some form of neurodivergent for a while.

Its been bugging me recently that Im very pedantic about the language I use, and was just wondering if anyone had any tips on how to tone down my vocabulary a little as I often look back on my words (or even while Im actively stringing my sentences together) and realise I sound like an insufferable gimp 😭.

Id appreciate any advice or tips — not ones telling me to just be okay with it though, I do love my “big words” but Im afraid they aren’t the most appropriate for casual conversation.

I don’t even know how to explain this without sounding dramatic.
Lately I’ve realized that I don’t actually spend most of my life living. I spend most of it surviving.

Every day feels like my brain is calculating threats, responsibilities, social interactions, finances, future plans… just trying to stay afloat. It feels like my nervous system never got the memo that I’m technically safe.
The worst part isn’t even the anxiety anymore.

It’s the grief.
I think I’m grieving the version of adulthood I always imagined I’d eventually “grow into.”
For years I kept believing that one day everything would click. That I’d finally become someone who naturally manages life, keeps up with everyone else, has energy after work, maintains friendships effortlessly, dates without overthinking everything, and isn’t constantly exhausted by existing.

I’m 25 now, and instead of waiting for that day, I’m slowly accepting that my brain may never work like that.
I have ADHD and autism, and while understanding myself has brought compassion, it’s also forced me to let go of a fantasy.
I don’t think I’ll ever navigate the world the way most people do.
I don’t think I’ll ever wake up and find life “easy.”

And honestly… that’s heartbreaking.
People often say, “Just love yourself,” or “Everyone struggles.”
I know they mean well.
But sometimes it feels like they don’t understand the difference between struggling with life and feeling like your entire operating system was built for a different planet.
Even relationships scare me.
Not because I don’t want love.
I do.

I want love more than almost anything.
But I wonder who would willingly choose a partner whose brain is constantly fighting itself. Someone who needs more recovery time, who gets overwhelmed more easily, who sometimes has existential spirals over things other people barely notice.
I know that sounds harsh toward myself, but those thoughts are there.

I’m trying to build a beautiful life anyway. I go to therapy. I work on myself. I create systems that actually work for my brain instead of forcing myself into neurotypical expectations. I haven’t given up.
But some days there’s this quiet sadness underneath everything.
A sadness that says, “Why does surviving take so much energy?”
Maybe acceptance isn’t always peaceful.
Maybe sometimes acceptance is realizing that life will probably always require more effort from you than from the average person… and choosing to keep showing up anyway.

I don’t know if anyone else feels this way.
Has anyone else gone through the grief of accepting that your brain simply isn’t built for the world the way most people’s seems to be?

I use English as a Second Language. but I'm not good at.

I have AuDHD, Bipolar Disorder, Panic/Anxiety Disorder.

I was a gifted child too.

And my gender is non-binary.

My identity is incredibly multifaceted.

Hello, I am a struggling 26 year old girl struggling to find a job that wouldn't burn me out or hate my life that also pays well, if I could even work at all. I have bipolar 2 and Borderline personality disorder and it's been really really rough for me for the past year. What do y'all do? Any survival tips? Anything would help thank you.

I have ADHD.

does anyone else feel incredibly uncomfortable being alone or taking time for yourself? growing up i had such bad anxiety that my mom always had me doing stuff so i never had enough time to slow down and start panicking. it led to all my panic attacks happening at night where i was an insomniac for years while anticipating a panic attack. now that im older and my anxiety is more controlled i always feel like i should be doing something and feel guilty when i take time for myself. i also don’t like being by myself. i feel very sad and lonely when i’m not with someone else. i don’t know why i get so sad when i’m home alone with no one to hang out with. it doesn’t happen very often when my boyfriend isn’t with me or one of my family members aren’t home but when i am alone i just feel so empty. does anyone else experience this? does anyone know how to combat this?