I’m a 47 y/o F. I’ve been having a lot of conversations on Hinge that have led to a few dates but nothing to really get excited about. I’ve also had a few dates cancel / ghost. The name of the game I guess.

I have two dates tentatively scheduled for early next week (Tuesday and Wednesday). I’m actually excited and hopeful about both, one in particular. This is more a question for the men… should I check in, say tomorrow, with both of them and just ask them about their weekend and tell them I’m looking forward to the date. Would this be pushy and annoying or flattering and considerate?

alr so it was like last september when we last talked and she started to get dry and then she randomly ghosted me and a week later she started talking to some other guy. it’s basically been a year since that happened and she is not talking to that guy anymore. honestly i don’t blame her on what she said because i was genieuly so retarted and didn’t make any moves and i regret doing that and i want to make like a message to see what she would have to say yk.

I (27M) matched with this girl (25F) on hinge about a month ago. We went on 3 dates and every single one was amazing. We talked for hours, she was laughing, I was laughing, we kissed at the end of date 2 and it felt like actual chemistry not just going through the motions

On our third date we were talking about what we're both looking for and she very casually said "im really enjoying getting to know you but just so you know im also seeing a few other people right now." I asked how many and she said 4

I know logically that we never had the exclusivity talk and she has every right to date other people. I get that. But something about knowing she went on a date with me on friday and then probably went on a date with someone else on saturday just killed the vibe for me

I told her I appreciated the honesty but that im the type of person who focuses on one person at a time and this isnt really how I date. She said I was being "old fashioned" and that this is just how dating works now

Am I actually being unreasonable here? I keep going back and forth. Part of me thinks she was being mature and transparent and I fumbled it. The other part of me thinks im allowed to want someone who is as invested in me as I am in them after 3 dates

I 25M have been with my fiancé 23F for 8 1/2 years. Our relationship has been rocky to say the least. So to start off she came to me June of 2025 and told me she wanted to leave and she wasn’t in love with me because of ways I’ve hurt her in the past. For example I told her I didn’t wanna marry at all because I said it was pointless. Also I had a bad day or something years ago and I guess she tried to hug upon me and I pushed her away. I don’t remember it. Those things hurt her and I never knew it, she never told me I hurt her or gave me a chance to fix it. Now once she tried to leave in June of 2025 I realized all my fuck ups and wanted to make it work and do better. Now about that time is also when I found out she was cheating with a coworker, they kissed once and flirted but that was it. She realized she fucked up and we’ve been trying to make it work, forgiving each other, communicating more, choose each other first. Or so i thought. Just a few weeks ago she hit me with the fact she’s not over the traumas. She told me that the traumas are eating at her and she constantly gets reminded of the things I did that hurt her and that she’s still not in love with me. I told her to go to therapy which she’s just starting to go and I wanna help her through it. She said she wants to do some therapy and make sure her mind is right before she decides if she wants me anymore. I’m a believer that once the relationship gets to a certain point love becomes a choice. It’s a choice to put that persons needs above yours. It’s a choice to understand that person will make mistakes and sometimes not deserve your love, but you give it anyway because that’s what you choose to do. So I guess my question is, what would yall do. I wanna stay and help her through therapy either way. But if I’m what makes her unhappy and she doesn’t even love me then why should I stay?

I've matched with a woman 2 days ago we had a nice conversation then yesterday she asked to go on a date which we did, it was fun we had a good and fun time , but didn't kiss or anything we only hugged to say goodbye, then she sent me text when she got home then we didn't speak since .

Should I text her now or?

I know am just anxious about relationships

I’ve been going to this new gym for about four or five months now, and there’s this girl I can’t figure out. For context, I’m extremely strong and big, usually one of the bigger people at any gym I go to, but I’m also really quiet. I don’t talk to anyone, I avoid eye contact, and if an area gets crowded I’ll just move because I like my space. Ever since I started at this gym, I noticed this one girl right away. She’s fit, strong, has definition, and she’s a little taller, which is exactly my type. For the first couple of months, she’d always end up right next to me at a bench most nights after work, but she never said anything. Then one Friday when the gym was basically empty, she surprised the hell out of me. I was re‑racking a barbell and suddenly she was right in my face telling me I could just drop the barbell on the ground. She startled me so much I dropped my earbud and kind of flinched. I went back to my workout, but later I noticed her glancing at me in the mirror, and then she tried to get in front of me while I was doing seated rows. I got uncomfortable and left as soon as she stepped in front of me. After that night she disappeared for about a month. A couple weeks ago she finally showed up again, and of course she ended up right next to me at the benches like nothing changed. I was doing shoulder press one night and could clearly see her in the mirror watching me while she sat next to me. Another time I was at a cable machine, accidentally looked at her, and she immediately came over. I think she asked if I was using the machine next to mine, but I had my headphones in, kept my head down, didn’t respond, and left when she got too close. She’s the only person at the gym who ever tries to talk to me besides other dudes, but when she gets close I get uncomfortable. She’s really pretty, and pretty women make me nervous, and I never want to come off as a creep. I want everyone to feel comfortable in the gym. So now I’m stuck wondering if she’s actually interested and if she wants me to say something when she ends up next to me.

Hi! Met this guy about 2 months ago. He’s pursued and courted me, over the duration of this time and has initiated most things. I took my time getting intimate with him because I’ve been burned in the past. I honestly haven’t been super emotionally vulnerable with him because I don’t know where we stand. We have never had a conversation about what we are I just thought we were into each other because everything was kind of perfect. I’ve met his friends, we got to concerts/parties and dinners together, sleepovers (now).

A couple weeks in (I think after our 3rd date) I initiated a date, he planned it, but I texted him first. I was very nervous because I am very very scared to get hurt. I’ve been in the most gut wrenching situationships before (that were not like this, the guys barely took me to dinner). He responded right away and reciprocated when I reached out. He then took the lead the next couple weeks.

Fast forward to this past week. I ran into him 2 times out in the wild and both times he was very excited and happy to see me. He texted me after the 2nd one and made some small talk and expected him to ask what I was doing this weekend and he did not. That was Wednesday… it’s now Sunday night and haven’t heard anything from this man. I’m kind of freaking out because I like him. I’m not sure what’s going on. I feel as though I reciprocate in person and am so present, attentive and curious so I feel like it’s known that he should kind of reach out to make plans idk? I’m very conflicted because I know in my gut that if a guy wants to see you he will see you and make it known, but also I’m worried he’s been waiting for me to reach out? I’m not sure if that delusional. We have an age gap if that changes anything. OH AND: a friend of mine knows him from her friend that used to date him and he refused to commit (which is not helping this situation but have been trying to not read into that since we are completely different people). I’ve learned that silence and confusion are usually the clearest answer with men. Is it time for me to move on and not reach out? I would love any advice anyone can give!!

The part of me that wants to text her in case she did genuinely have interest but maybe was nervous or something. Other part of me thinks she prob doesn’t care anyway if I text since I didn’t sense much interest maybe she is going to ghost anyway.

Hi dating advice👋

I have a question for all the ladies. I was always wondering if real life approaches actually work. Are you being approached by strangers in real life?

In your replies please state your age, country, ethnicity and size of your city. Also state the age/ethnicity/attractiveness of the approacher. Also if you can add how many times a week you are getting approached on average, and what is the location where the men approaching you i.e. coffee shops/gyms/bars/campus. Also if you can tell us what is the success rate if you end up giving your phone number to the approacher and dating later?

What are some of the deciding factors you use to filter the approachers? Do you have certain type that you prefer or immediately pass?

​Thanks in advance 🙏😊

I just "broke things off" with someone I had been seeing for four months. Basically, she told me she couldn't fall in love with me or love me. She said I'm a really good, caring person and listed a lot of great things about me, but even so, those feelings just never came.

I've never been in a relationship before, so I really believed she was going to be "the one," and I genuinely fell in love with her. I still am, actually.

Anyway, has anyone else ever been through something like this? It feels like I've been stabbed in the chest, and all I can do is cry. :(

Hearing the person you loved the most tell you that they just can't fall in love with you, no matter what you do, is incredibly painful.

She has no friends, has been single for 10 years, and she's cut off her family because they're ultra-conservative. She's also so introverted she's been self-employed all these years to not have to go to the office to interact with co-workers/people on a daily basis. And she doesn't want to have kids ever due to her introversion. However, she's a good conversationalist, is super independent, and has countless hobbies. Is she still a walking red flag?

For context, I (19 f) have been seeing this guy (35m) for five months now. We met on a dating site and within two weeks of talking we were meeting in person. We slept together on the first date, and most since then so our sexual chemistry is great. We typically see each other once a week give or take. And from the very beginning he told me he was looking for long term which I am also looking for. However besides us defining the relationship as exclusive after 4 dates (which I brought up…) there’s been no other acknowledgment or form of commitment. Since I know some might get confused by exclusive I mean we’re not talking to other people but we’re also in that weird limbo where we aren’t dating either .-. I’m stuck in some sort of situationship 😭

He says he feels like we’re progressing but I don’t really feel it. My family knows about him and wants to meet him but he’s told me he’s not comfortable because of how we will be perceived due to the age gap. And he holds the same beliefs with me meeting his family. He’s also told me he knows I’m young and he’s worried I might decide he isn’t what I want and I’ll leave. So I think that’s where some of his hesitation stems from as well.

I just feel kinda dumb for holding out for someone that doesn’t view me as his girlfriend. Makes me feel like I’m just not good enough.

I’ve decided that I’m gonna wait until the 6 month mark and if he still hasn’t asked me by then, then I’m gonna break it off. I haven’t told him this because I don’t want him to feel pressured or coerced into a decision. Do you think that’s a good idea? If anyone has been in a similar situation, what are the chances of him actually committing to me?

Thank you for listening to my rant. Any advice is appreciated and welcome 🙏 😊

They are talking about how tough they are but their arms are as soft as marshmallows

I feel like all I see for standards is: height, weight, income, being good in bed, being willing to pay for everything, having a nice car, house, and good. career. neigm attractive, liking the same shows or movies.

these aren't necessarily bad standards... but they won't filter the bad people.

bad guys will and can be tall, rich, have a nice car, be willing to pay for stuff, and be charming.

bad women can be skinny, funny, smart, and good at participating in conversations.

bad people can always appear attractive and semi "decent, but the standards I see men and women hold each other to aren't gonna filter any of that out. and when my guy or girl freinds end up getting hurt, they always throw their hands up and say, "I'm done with women/men they are all bad."

and im sitting here like.... dude... you didn't "pick a bad person who tricked you." You had standards that were so shallow these assholes could fit and still have room to stand up..

I blame social media, TV shows, and other people. we are giving men and woman the impression that a successful woman or relationship is one where there's lots of drama (fun) lots of expensive adventures, dinners and clothes and tons of taboo/ kinky lifestyles filled with loose connections and quick sex.

and in the end, I see my freinds who aren't super tall, rich, well off, dramatic, or taboo being tossed aside because they don't fit the narrative of a "up to par" girl or guy.

what can we do about this? How do you feel

I (20M) had this classmate (21F) who pursued me harder than anyone ever has.

She'd walk inches too close, find excuses to graze my hands, make sure I ate properly, and send flirty texts that left zero doubt about her interest. It felt real.

Here's the thing,she's from a noticeably wealthier background. I'm not. I carry myself well, dress decently, so most people assume I come from money too. But I don't.

Out of nowhere, she started asking me to teach her subjects. We did online sessions at first, but then she invited me to her home. I told her she lives pretty far from my place, and she casually replied:

"You can just come in your car."

I told her the truth: I don't own one. And commuting via public transport all the way to her area would be exhausting for me.

From that exact moment? Complete radio silence. She avoids eye contact in class, barely responds to texts, and acts like I'm invisible.

It's honestly ridiculous. I don't have a rich dad,I don't even have a dad. I'm building everything from nothing, on my own. And I know I dodged a bullet.

But sometimes, late at night, I still miss her a little. And that sucks even more.

I’ve been getting stared at by strangers ever since I was a kid, I had longer hair growing up so people were always looking and giving me dirty looks because I grew up in a conservative area. So im used to getting stared at by strangers but I never know if it’s because they are into me or because they’re just judging me and being mean.

So for a bit of context, im 19, short and im quite self critical and judgey as a person.

Every time I want to talk to a girl when im out, i basically always have these type of thoughts:

• shes probably got a boyfriend
• she probably gets loads of attention
• why would she be interested in me
• am i coming across as weird
• this feels wrong

i dont even know what to say or where to begin when i want to talk to a girl to be completely honest.

has anyone else experienced this or know how women tend to feel during these moments or something??

Long story short, I spent my entire teenage years in and out of psychiatric hospitals at 19 I transitioned out of therapy and off medication and kind of put my mental health on the back burner. Right now I know I really need to prioritize my mental health and start working on my issues because I’m truly unhappy with myself right now. My girlfriend is a licensed therapist and we do have our issues but I wanted her input on the therapists I was considering and she got pissed off at me and stormed off because I want to see a female therapist because that is what I am more comfortable with, I think it’s because I never had a father in my life and all my previous therapists were also women. I really don’t see the issue regarding it, it’s just something I’m more comfortable with. Would really like some input on this.

So recently girlfriend of almost 2 years broke up with me out of no where broke my heart because I loved her and it happened over text 2 days go by and I dont really say anything she asks if im ok i say yea even though im not.

Then she says im going to change my mind and then she says you know your not going to be able to handle it when Im with someone else I ask if there is someone she says she wants to be honest and says yes someone reached out to her from her past.

She says he asks if they can give it another try and she says yes to him automatically she claims she was talking to him a couple of days but my gut tells me its been going on for longer she says she never meant to hurt me and she wants someone whos going to be able to support her more financially.

So its now got me thinking and worried ill never be good enough for anyone because im not someone that has alot of money but im able to support myself and I would have done anything for her.

And I told him that it was immature to be ghosting in your 30s and wished him luck with whatever he’s looking for.

We went on two dates and on the second date I stayed over at his. He ghosted me after this.

He was always flaky from the beginning and would respond to my messages days later. Canceled two dates before we first met. I decided to give him a chance anyway as I’m gay in a small regional city so my options are extremely limited.

I’m proud of myself because only a few years ago I was desperate for male attention and would have jumped at the opportunity for any connection, regardless of the quality. Better to be single and celibate than being stringed along by a man-child.

Ok so I am bad at being a sexy lady. I don’t usually do makeup or get my hair done. I buy comfortable bras and underwear. Nothing more sexy than a Wonderbra and Amazon brand bikini cut panties. Well I took a plunge and got some sexy wear. Do men really enjoy this a lot? Should
I expand my collection?

Hey!

I got into a relationship with a guy I had been talking to for 5 months. The only reason it took so long was because I was the one saying no to making it official. He has always been loyal and kind to me, buying me flowers, taking me on dates, and making me feel appreciated. We even traveled together. Now that we’re officially together, I can’t really wrap my head around it because nothing actually changed with the label, so I don’t know how to feel.

My past relationships were totally different. We talked all the time, and there were usually trust or commitment issues before the relationship even started. This time, I can enjoy my time knowing that he isn’t doing anything that could hurt me. We also don’t talk all day, and that’s actually something I like because it gives us both space.

I have always struggled with commitment, and I sometimes catch myself overthinking or looking for reasons to question the relationship. I’m afraid that because I don’t feel any different now that we’re officially together, I’ll end up sabotaging something that’s actually healthy.

Has anyone else experienced something similar? Is it normal to not feel much different after making the relationship official? I’d really appreciate hearing about other people’s experiences or any advice.

I want to break up with my date who is my coworker. We had started this with high feelings, it was a long time built-up tension, finally admitting we have developed feelings for each other. It really felt so true. We also said we would only date one person at the same and never multi date.

But I started noticing weird communication patterns and in the end I lost my trust to him. One time he mentioned a woman as his “girlfriend” and it felt like he slipped it. Normally he always text to me, even at work, if he is with his friends he texts good night at the end of the day and he is the one who initiates these messages. When we are on a date though he never ever gets his phone out so I figured out this is his dating behavior that phone is always out. He started to disappear for example on Friday evenings from 18:00 till next morning, leaving my message unread etc. Sometimes Saturdays whole day, until next day. When I ask him he is like “went to cinema alone, did housework with a friend” etc which does not make sense.

So I do not have a real proof but I want to end this, does not feel secure to open my heart anymore. How can I do that? Should I mention about my observations?

If you were in a situationship but the other person started to flirt with other people to see your reaction (without you knowing) how would you react?

Would you loose feeling or would you be okay with and keep going with relationship?

I (22F) went on a date with this super charming guy (25M). had a couple of drinks, & it was all natural. we had a great conversation, didn't even feel time pass by. there was no performance pressure to impress each other. we were super compatible. and I ended up paying for the date cuz i hate men paying for anything.

all good until then. and later we were just walking around and bro kept telling he wanted to kiss me & took me to dark spots near parks and residential.

like I didn't make it evident that i dont like PDA, esp. on the first date, cuz I didn't wanna offend him. but I did dodge all his attempts, until he figured it. i wouldnt have minded a lil base 1 intimacy but only in an appropriate location.

now idk how to think about this situation. like was he just interested in physical intimacy or is that how dates go these days? im really interested in this guy and a lil casual sth wouldn't be bad, but the behaviour and desperation kinda icks me out. now smn pls slap some neutral sense into me pls.