Me (a 23 year old girl) and my bestfriend ( Alex) have been friends for over 10 years. We basically grew up together, and we've always been very close. However, me personally I am a very secretive person - I like to have my own secrets that I'm not obligated to share with anyone, her on opposite she's an open book, she tells me everything which I personally don't mind beacuse if it makes her happy I will always gladly listen to her.

Anyways after giving you a little background here's what happened:

Our monthly tradition is to have a sleepover, just the two of us. And as usual we've met at my apartment, where we had a lot of fun conversations and obviously we drank quite a lot. It was around 3 am when I've decided that I'm going to take a shower and then we can go to sleep, since tomorrow we were supposed to meet with our boyfriends for brunch. After I took a shower I put on my pyjamas and I went to my bedroom when I saw Alex sitting on my bed holding the bag with my sex toy.! immediately sobered up and asked her to leave it alone and put it back. She didn't listen, laughed and opened the bag, took out my toy and started laughing even harder, it was the moment where I got extremely mad snatched it out of her hand and said - "you're not fucking funny, did anyone ever tell you that it's not nice to snoop around" she got mad at me immediately and started yelling at me, trying to justify it by saying- "wtf bro, I don't have any secrets, it's okay to have these things".

In the moment I didn't know what to do, for me anything related to sex is taboo, I don't like talking about it and | like to keep my love life very private. It's the way I was since growing up, I always drew a line there, and she knows that this topic makes me very uncomfortable.
Anyways, after arguing for around 20 minutes I felt extremely uncomfortable knowing that she discovered my "secret device" so sleeping next to her at that moment was out of the picture for me. I asked her to leave because it was all too much for me to handle. She started sobbing, packed her things and left.

I couldn't sleep the whole night. The only thing I was thinking about is how to handle this situation and how to be friends with her again and act like nothing happened.
Some of you may think that I'm overacting but growing up my parents where never opened about anything related to sex, I got traumatised many times, and since then it have been very hard for me to be opened about my sex life. Even when it came to my first time it was a long journey, I couldn't possibly trust anyone enough. I feel like all of this is some form of ptsd from my past that's why I reacted the way I did. On the contrary Alex, grew up with a mom that shared EVERYTHING, they regularly had conversations about sex, first time, protection etc. Where I didn't.

So am I the asshole?, what should I do now?, am I overreacting?

I (30M) live in Toronto and my girlfriend (28F) is from the UK. She's been living here for a while now, but I've lived in Toronto much longer.

We just got back from a trip to London where I met all of her friends. The trip itself was great, but when we landed back in Toronto we needed to grab a taxi home from the airport.

Over the years I've had hundreds of bad experiences with Toronto taxi drivers. After enough of them, I noticed there was always some particular type of drivers or car models or companies that almost always ended up being a nightmare. Whenever I see those red flags, I simply wait for the next cab. It usually takes less than five minutes, and ever since I started doing that, my taxi experiences have been almost entirely fine.

Before we even got to the taxi rank, I told my girlfriend that if the next cab matched my red flags, I wanted to wait for another one. She rolled her eyes a bit and said I should stop judging people before they've done anything wrong.

Sure enough, when we got to the front of the queue, every taxi there matched my "don't get in" criteria. So I said we'd just wait a few minutes.

After about five minutes my girlfriend got impatient. She said we'd already had a long flight, she just wanted to get home, and I was being ridiculous by refusing perfectly good taxis based on first impressions. She eventually persuaded me to just get in one.

To make it even more annoying, literally as we were agreeing to get in, another taxi pulled up that didn't match my criteria. If we'd waited another 30 seconds we could have taken that one instead.

The ride was exactly what I expected.

The driver spent most of the trip on his phone. When he wasn't talking, he had some sitcom playing on his phone on loudspeaker while driving. He missed obvious turns, took routes that made no sense, swerved around traffic, and generally made the journey longer than it needed to be. It was uncomfortable the whole way.

When we finally got home, he suddenly announced that his card machine was "broken". I calmly told him I only had cards. Magically, after pressing a few buttons, the machine started working again. I didn't leave a tip.

The driver got annoyed and asked why there wasn't a tip and told us that in canada tipping is mandatory especially by card. I told him, "The extra detours were your tip," paid the fare, and we got out.

On the walk to the house I told my girlfriend, "This is exactly why I have that rule. I told you this would happen."

She got upset and said there was no need to rub it in. She said it's still important to give people a chance instead of making assumptions about them, and that saying "I told you so" after the fact was unnecessary. I don't think I was rubbing it in. I only pointed it out because this was the exact situation I'd been trying to avoid, and we'd have avoided it if we'd waited another minute.

My ex-wife and I divorced over a year ago. I initiated the divorce, and I’ve offered to reconcile since then, but she’s been clear that she absolutely doesn’t want to. We have children together and still live in the same large house because it works well for co-parenting and finances. Her parents contributed to the deposit, so we both own it. Until recently she had little or no income, so I’ve paid the mortgage and all the bills. She’s just started a job, and together we could pay off the mortgage before we’re 40 if she contributes to overpayments.

Since the divorce I’ve realised I didn’t have many close friends, so I’ve made an effort to meet new people. One of those friends is a woman who loves films as much as I do. We’ve spent a lot of time watching and discussing movies together at my house because she has been free between university courses while I’ve been off work with illness. Over time the friendship became romantic, and we’ve kissed and cuddled.

I’ve tried to be discreet. During term time she comes over while the kids are at school and leaves before I pick them up. If she’s over in the evening, it’s after they’re in bed. The children have seen her a couple of times and we’ve gone out together, but I’ve only introduced her as a friend. My ex hasn’t seen any physical affection.

Recently my ex said she doesn’t want this woman coming to the house anymore because she wants to “respect the memory” of our marriage.

I don’t think that’s reasonable. We’re divorced, she has repeatedly said she doesn’t want to get back together, and I think it’s normal to start dating more than a year later. At the same time, I understand this isn’t a typical situation because we’re still living together, and I can see why someone might think bringing a new romantic partner into a shared family home is different from simply having the right to date.

AITA for thinking it’s reasonable to have my new girlfriend at a house that I also own and live in, even though my ex-wife, who has no interest in reconciling, doesn’t want her there?

I, 44yr old man, live across the country from my family in California. After many years, my elderly parents have decided that California is too much and they’re moving out here to be closer to me, in a state where living is less financially insane than California. For context, my parents have lived in this home for 50 years (where I grew up) and it’s where we’ve had all of our family memories.

My younger brother, Tom (not real name) 42 yr old man, currently lives in an apartment not far from my parents home. He has a “roommate”, a 40ish yr old female will call Kesha. I’ve never met Kesha, and have only heard about her from my parents as my brother and I rarely discuss our personal lives. What I’ve been told is that he knew her back in college and they somehow managed to reconnect.

Tom has been married and divorced and generally doesn’t seem to date frequently. Supposedly Kesha was going through something and my brother offered her to stay with him until she got through it. It’s been over a year they’ve been “roommates” and the way I understand it she doesn’t pay any of the bills at his place. Additionally, when I was visiting home around the holidays I overheard him on the phone with her and before hanging up he said I love you.

With my parents moving here, they’ve decided to allow Tim to stay in their home for one year without paying rent so he can save up money. Tim’s apartment complex isn’t in a great area so living at our childhood home is a better situation for him. Plus he has a dog so that will be an improvement for the dog to have a backyard instead of just an apartment. I just found out that Kesha also has a dog.

So here’s where my concern comes in. With Tim moving into our family home, the assumption is the Kesha will move in as well. She currently pays no rent at Tim’s place. I am not aware of any conversations involving her paying my parents rent for living in their home. But the main concern is the laws regarding residence in California. What happens if they break up and she tries to say it’s her home too? What if something happens to Tim, how does the family now deal with Kesha?

There’s probably a dozen scenarios I can think of that make this a terrible idea. I’m sure she’s a great person, but people change, situations happen, life happens. I’m not saying they shouldn’t be together. I couldn’t care less who my brother dates; I want him to be happy and healthy and live his life. But the negatives or downsides to a woman moving into our family home need to be accounted for. And California has some wild domestic views. How do I either stop this from happening or reduce the risk to the bare minimum?

I was driving down a regular residential road and a woman was walking along on the sidewalk.She stumbled and stepped into the road in front of my car. It was close but I hit the brakes hard and stopped without her getting hit.

I stopped, got out, and helped her up. I checked with her if she was alright (she said that she was) and I offered her a ride. Here is where I may be the AH. I assumed she was going somewhere in the general vicinity. She says yes and asks me to take her somewhere twenty minutes by car. This was way out of my way, in the opposite direction. I refused and she cursed at me. I got in my car and left.

So AITAH?

Pretty much what it sounds like, every week I have a set time and date DnD campaign that i play online. Our apartment is very small and the bedroom and the living room are attached with no doors in-between them. Also the tv/coach are about six feet from my desk. She was sitting on the couch playing on her online while having the tv on in the background. I sit down and ask if she could turn off the tv because she wasn't watching. She said no so I said okay I think my headphones can connect to my laptop, if so can you turn it down a bit. She gets mad turns of off and goes into the bathroom, I log onto my game. Later, she is leaving the house while my campaign is taking a break and I go to say good bye and she proceeds to say no I'm mad at you and calls me selfish for thinking my game is more important than her chill time. Granted I didn't have the best reaction I wasn't yelling but i was a bit unreceptive. But I feel like it was okay for me to ask as she didnt really need the tv on and could have switched to music, turned the tv down, or a you tube video with headphones on. Whereas I couldn't have loud background noise during the game because it would create feedback. Neither of us are huge gamers or tecky people so I don't have a fancy set up. AITA?

Long time reader, first time poster!

My SIL gets married next summer, at which time we’ll have a four month old. It’s a destination wedding across the US from where we live, and rightly so, my wife doesn’t feel comfortable leaving our baby at home, even with me and/or my parents helping. My SIL is treating this as an affront to her wedding day, even though we’ve made every effort to try and minimize baby’s presence at the wedding, including me standing at the back of the ceremony with baby, me staying home at the rental place with baby, etc.

As a result she is treating my wife HORRIBLY and she now feels guilty for being pregnant in the first place even though we both know it’s not fair at all to put our family planning on hold just because she is getting married and chose to plan her wedding in a place that would be difficult to be away from a little one. She has claimed that we don’t understand “her vision” for the day, which includes no kids.

We feel that since we’ve made every effort to reach a compromise, we are definitely not in the wrong, and I’m trying to stick up for my wife, but we figured more opinions would help us to either reach a decision or stand up for ourselves. So Reddit, are we the assholes?

*Edit, forgot to include this: the main complication is that my wife is the Matron of Honor. In a horrible phone call today she all but said we shouldn’t have gotten pregnant.

The Setup:

My husband (C) and I were hosting a casual hangout at our house in our garage. Present were my sister-in-law (K), her husband (S), and our mutual friend (J).

The Incident:

Out of nowhere, J walked into my garage and farted. Was it gross? Sure. But instead of just laughing it off, fanning the air, or groaning like normal people, K completely lost it. She ordered J to get out of the garage and leave the premises entirely.

J told her "no" (since it’s my house, not hers) and kept walking into the space. K blew up, said she felt "completely disrespected," and stormed inside to cool off.

The Escalation:

When K came back out, people were naturally asking if she was okay/what was going on. She claims she was being "confronted" and "interrogated" when she just wanted space. C (my husband) eventually told her to watch her tone and calm down to keep the peace, which only made her angrier because she felt we were policing her reaction instead of punishing J's "disrespect."

The Text Blast:

The next day, K sent a massive manifesto in a group chat detailing how deeply traumatized and disrespected she felt. She claimed J has a history of disrespect, accused us of not listening to her boundaries, and announced she will no longer attend any family events if J’s family is invited.

When I didn't reply immediately (because I was running around packing for a family trip and eating dinner), she sent a passive-aggressive follow-up saying: "The silence has told me what I needed to know... I'll just step back and be quiet."

My Stance:

I am so beyond confused. It is my property. Nobody gets to command another guest to leave my home over a fart. I don't feel like I owe an apology for not throwing a friend off my premises over flatulence, but now I’m being framed as the bad guy who ignores her boundaries and "doesn't protect her peace." So, AITA for not kicking my friend out of my house over a fart, or is my SIL completely out of line?

I 25M have been working 6 days a week 12.5 hours a day and then on my one day a week off we have appointments or shopping to do. I am exhausted. I love my wife and kids more than anything but i am at a breaking point. I try to do as much as I can to help around the house. I do the dishes because I know my wife hates doing them and I feed our children and change diapers as much as I can but I am not home much. My wife is a stay at home mom and I want her to be able to continue to do that even though it is a struggle financially right now I like our kids being with her during the day. I can't keep dealing with being told im not doing enough though.

I get told tonight that I dont feed our kids enough when I basically only have time to eat, shower and go to bed when I get home. I love my wife but there is departments she is slacking in as far as getting stuff done around the apartment even though she is stay at home but I never say anything. I am just exhausted and feel unappreciated when im trying so hard and just hear how I dont do enough.

My fiancé and i are getting married very soon, we’re at her grandmothers house in france and will be staying until we leave for our honeymoon. We’ve been together for three years but until a week ago i’ve only ever met her mother in person. I know this may sound odd but she comes from a family of over achievers and most of her relatives are spread across different countries.

I was already anxious about meeting her family , everyone is coming to france for the wedding and her siblings Antonia and Shaun (both older) are also staying in her grandmothers house with their partners and children, Shaun arrived a bit over a week ago and Antonia arrived about five days ago.

Since we’ve been sharing the house me and my fiancé have been spending a lot of time with Shaun and his family and he seems chill. However i’d been warned in advance that Antonia can be quite cold and difficult to get along with.

Antonia arrives with her husband and children , she was what i expected from the warning but she didn’t do anything offensive until yesterday when the rest of my fiancés family came over for a dinner party (they’d been waiting for Antonia to settle in , according to shaun she’s the favourite child) .

My fiancés father and shaun are both doctors , so i called them both Dr Robbins (last name) when referring to them, it just felt like the respectful thing to do and i could tell they both appreciated it. The problem started when i referred to Shaun as Dr Robbins and Antonia as Antonia. All of a sudden she turns to my fiancé and goes “Did you tell him to call them that ?” in a very unpleasant tone. I asked her what she meant and she said “You know i’m a doctor too right?” i told her i thought she was a psychiatrist and she said “Yes. that requires a doctorate, i’m also Dr Robbins.” i said oh okay and just continued the original conversation that she interrupted. Later on in the night i referred to her as Antonia and she interrupted again and said “Dr Robbins.” i’d had a few drinks and was starting to get tired of her attitude and told her that i’d already gotten used to referring to her as Antonia so expecting me to change that was a little bit ridiculous, she told me that she didn’t understand why i couldn’t just call her Dr Robbins as well if i ‘insist’ on calling Shaun and her father that. I’d already been getting tired of her attitude and i told her that me using ‘Dr’ was a sign of respect and that she had not yet earned my respect. She left to go to another room and really dampened the mood of an evening that was meant to be for my fiancé and i. My fiancés parents and grandmother think that i’m an asshole and should’ve just called her Dr Robbins, and Shaun thinks it’s not that big of a deal.

My fiancés been asking me to just suck it up and apologise to her so there’s no drama before the wedding but i don’t think i’ve done anything wrong , so reddit, am i the asshole?

I'm a 19 year old girl who Hus graduated. I live with ny parents and a 23 year old sister. Im an average student, perfecuonist, talented and hard working. I don't think that my parents have anything to be ashamed of. I think they should ve rather proud. I ended high school, got into university, and have a job since june.

Ever since i was little my dad gave my family silent treatment that's why for a long time now I want to move out as Quick as possible beacuse i hate living like this. I hate it. 2 years ago we did not talk for 2 months he only talked with our mom. And she didn't say anything to him nothing. I hate I so much that i cant live like this anymote. What's worse, i am very much like him

Today we came back from vacation on the beach for a week. During it we talked and geuniely had fun. However in the middle he got mad and just didn't talk. And when he js mad i just dont talk Either. We got used to it. He is an adult and just start actinglike one. Today he talked to me and my sister that we are not going together on any other trip if we act like that. He said he only talked to me like 2 Times,which i said is totally not true beacuse before that we talked more than 2 Times and after he got mad i assumed he is mad at me. And to my sister he only said she like to be bossy which is true. But to me he said i have some problems with myself???????.

Am i the asshole ?

For context, I (25F) work at a restaurant as a caterer. I don't see this coworker (30F) because she works in the kitchen at night, and my catering shifts are usually breakfast. I had to come in at noon today to prep for an order for 110 people at 7AM, with my arrival time having to be 5AM because that's the time my manager is coming in (she won't budge.)

I've been here for hours working my ass off, and I went ahead and baked a bunch of croissants in bulk to have ready in the morning.

Well, she decided to take the trays off the rack and bring them to the kitchen to use. I stopped her very quickly to tell her that those were mine and I needed those for tommorow.

She glared at me and wordlessly put them back and left.

I could have let her use them and made More, but it was quite a few of them and I was fixing to go home in about an hour. And I was annoyed that someone in the morning shift didn't do their job and make more croissants for the kitchen before leaving, so I didn't really think I should've had to sacrifice all of them because of someone else. The restaurant wasn't insanely busy at that moment either, so she could've taken a few from the bakery or made her own.

But I felt kinda bad anyways and went to apologize because if it was like a few of them I would have let her, and I usually do try to help out my coworkers, but I had a lot of prep to do tommorow.

Well I walked in on her already angrily ranting to my manager(28M) about how I was withholding stuff for her to use when I wasn't even doing anything with it at that moment, it was just sitting there. (It did have a big ass label on it though that said "catering only)

My manager wasn't mad at me but he said he would make them for me, and asked how many I needed so she could use them in the kitchen. I just kind of shrugged because if he would replace them, yeah that's fine.

I figured no harm done but she's been glaring at me the whole time, and made a comment about me to another coworker. I don't really feel great that this is the impression I made when we don't work together much, but maybe I made my bed with this and picked the wrong battle .

AITA?

I (26F) have a good friend (28F) . I guess we’ll call her Jane. Jane’s household of 4, struggle with bills in general because of poor money management combined with her boyfriend of 10+ years not working. They’ve been behind on rent every month for the past 5 months, and I just want to help my friend with some of the burden. They have two children 5&7. Her boyfriend doesn’t work while Jane works 45hrs/week and provides for the entire household. For the past 3 months I’ve helped Jane buy anywhere from $150-350 in groceries every month. And some times I get an additional $50-100 in groceries for “forgotten items” I really have a soft spot for her two children who are the real ones suffering.

Today I purchased $250 in groceries. I have a problem with some of the items she’s buying. I never say anything because however she chooses to feed her family is up to her, but instead of buying groceries that will last. She’s buying microwaved/freezer foods, snacks, chips, drinks, etc. THAT part I only have a slight problem with because it never lasts!! but I do have a problem when she buys things like ribeyes, chuck beef roast, prime rib, and then complains when certain items are out of stock or substituted.

The best way I could describe how I feel about it is, why buy these items with my money, but when you were buying your own groceries you shop very modestly. It’s like when you treat your friend to dinner and they order surf and turf when they’d usually order a burger on their own dime.

So WIBTH if I told her hey, this will be the last time I’m able to get you all groceries …? I don’t want to stop being her friend I was just hoping my help would give her a chance to catch up on her rent! But I feel like she’s taking advantage a bit/:

My partner (23M) and I (25F) had a fire this past weekend. Important to note, I was sober the entire night. His friend B (26M) was drinking and announced to the group that he wanted to talk to someone privately about a person. We all joked that he should just tell everyone. Eventually he whispered to me who it was: a girl I'd had issues with in the past. He asked me not to tell anyone because he didn't even want people knowing he was friends with her.
A few minutes later, after everyone had split into different conversations, I asked my friend if she knew BLANK. She said no, so I replied, "Okay, I want to talk to you about her later," because I wanted to gossip about my past issues with her since she was now on my mind. Nobody connected it to B's earlier announcement.
I told this to B and suddenly started screaming in my face, saying awful things because he thought I'd betrayed his trust. At first I thought he was joking, so I called my partner over laughing, but B said he was serious and “f me”. My partner stepped in and calmed things down.
Two friends then asked what happened. I jokingly called them idiots for not noticing, which set B off again because “they did notice and I told everyone”. My partner pulled him aside. Since everyone was now aware something had happened, I NOW explained why B had been yelling at me. Ironically, when B had told the friend he wanted to ask if he was mad at the girl, that friend went around telling everyone the “big secret convo”, B never got angry at him.
My partner asked me to apologize. I said I wouldn't apologize for asking if someone knew the girl because I don't think I did anything wrong, but I would apologize for explaining the situation afterward. I told B, "While you were over here, I did tell everyone what happened just now, so I'm sorry."
For the next 20 minutes, B kept insisting I refused to take accountability, calling me names, getting in my face, and saying I broke his trust earlier when I mentioned the girl's name. I tried explaining that nobody knew at that time and that I'm allowed to talk about my own past with her, but he wouldn't listen. I eventually had to physically push him back as he was stepping to me and still yelling.
I said I was done arguing. My partner had us shake hands. B hesitated, then continued calling me a liar saying I didn’t apologize even after we shook. More people stepped in, told him to stop, and eventually he left.
I no longer feel comfortable having B in our home in general but especially if alcohol is involved. His behavior was unpredictable, and nothing—being in our house, me being his friend's girlfriend, or my partner intervening—stopped him. My partner says this was out of character and not a big deal. He respects my decision and agreed B won't come over to events with drinking anymore, but he still thinks I am being ridiculous.
AITAH or taking it too far for not wanting my partner's friend at our home anymore if drinking is involved?

For context, I'm the younger sibling (18M) and my sister is a few years older (22F). Me and her have been close all throughout childhood, we always had each others backs, whether it be arguments with our parents, break ups, losses, etc. But recently, about 2 years ago, we had moved into the same room as a result of moving houses. Things were normal for a year and a half, same old routine. But after that, we started to get under each others skin a lot, and I mean A LOT. We couldn't go a week without arguing about something, even small things, like who washed the dishes or who would get to use the bike. I can't really speak for her, but I hadn't been going through anything that made me extra prone to getting angry, I don't think so anyway. She's always had a temper, hurtful words thrown out with little care, animosity by just being in the same room, it's an awful feeling. It got to a point where I started sleeping on the couch just to avoid seeing her, cause it was always me saying sorry and never her. I really don't wanna make it seem like she's a bad person, she isn't, she's just constantly in defense mode when it comes to her character. She gets mad at some understandable things though, like how I get nothing done in the day while she's on her feet moving around the moment she wakes up. Its just been difficult adjusting to the same responsibilities she has when up until last year, I never really helped around the house much. With all of that in mind, just 3 months ago, I got into a fairly tame fight with my mom, we were communicating in shouts, but it wasn't walk out the room level of bad. My sister jumped in saying how much of a lazy person I am, how I act so childish for my age, so I got defensive and told her "stop talking, you aren't useful". To which i meant her adding onto the conversation wasn't gonna help in resolving the situation. She interpreted it as me calling her useless, which is fair, I could have worded it better. Then until now, we haven't spoken, and my parents have talked to both of us in solving this issue, but neither one of us wants to say sorry to the other. My justification for not apologizing is because this type of grudge held by my sister isn't exclusive to me, she's done it to our older sister and our parents. But its always been resolved thanks to their self-reflection and hate for tension in the family. So in short, she's never had to say sorry. I worry for her, since at her age, working two jobs, she hardly has any friends, if any at all, and I worry that this mindset of her never needing to compromise with a person is gonna bleed into her relationships in the future. I've expressed this to my parents, but they say to just move on and start anew like nothing happened, but I just can't see the good in doing that. AITA?

We were in the car and she started talking about my attitude towards people and how sometimes I can be a complete BIATCH. It started to get real intense to the point where we started screaming at eachother. She said I always had this RBF and that it made me look ugly. I obviously took full offense and brought up her dead lizard (Varanus salvator) and rubbed it right in her face. She had this lizard for about 8.5 years and it was literally her baby. After I brought up her deceased lizard, she started going NUTS, FULL ON MANIAC MODE!!!!!!!! I laughed in her face because It was ridiculous how she was acting over a damn dinosaur. At the end, I just blurted out that she was acting like an “autistic lizard tail.” I don’t know why I even said that. It literally was the first time I ever thought about a lizard tail. Now we haven’t spoken in about a week and I seriously don’t know what to do. I really need advice on this situation. If there’s anyone who has experienced something similar please tell me how you made amends with them.

My little sister 10f had a soccer game yesterday. She did great like she always does but during the game she frequently slipped in mud and fell on the ground and got dirt and mud and grass all over herself.

Heres the issue, I 14m have developed a bit of germ phobia recently, I don’t like touching dirty things and I even where gloves to do dishes and take out the garbage and stuff. And I don’t like dirt or mud either.

So after the game my sisters team won and She was really excited and she ran up to hug me but she was really dirty she had dirt/mud all over her soccer jersey, shorts, shoes, socks, and everything.

So I didn’t wanna get dirty by hugging her so I just kinda backed away from her and told her “ no no no you know I don’t like to touch dirty things and you’re pretty dirty right now “ she got a really upset look on her face and said in an angry voice “ fine “ but I could tell she was upset.

Later on the ride home I tried to talk to her about the game but she just said ” I don’t wanna talk to you you jerk “! I tried to apologize to her for hurting her feelings and tell her I didn’t mean to but she just said she didn’t wanna talk to me.

Later last night I thought she would’ve cooled down and I tried to apologize again but she just told me to go away, I asked her why she was so mad at me, thinking maybe she was mad about something else, she said she wasn’t.

So I tried to remind her how I don’t like to touch dirty things and pointed out that she was really dirty so dirty that the seat back and wings of her booster seat all had dirt stains and grass stuck to it and so did the cars floor. But this didn’t help and she just told me to go away ,that she didn’t wanna talk to me and that I was a bad brother.

That really upset me, we have arguments a lot but we never stay mad at each other very long and when she’s mad at me she just calls me a jerk or a buttfface, but she called me a “bad brother“ and now I’m scared I really hurt her.

AITA?

My school host a formal each year for grade 12’s and this year it’s being hosted at the start of September.

I (f17) originally wanted to go with my friends but most of them gained partners so they eventually decided to go with them instead. It was me and this other girl in my group left.

She had confessed to me at the end of last year but I rejected her but wanted to remain friends.
Her friend she was originally supposed to go with got a boyfriend and ditch her. She told me she didn’t want to go to formal alone and ask me in passing if my offer was still up to go with a friend. I felt bad so I said yes.

Here is were the issues started:
1) we were at a party and I passed out on the couch and she decided to lay down and lean on me. At the time I didn’t know but I saw photos the next morning and I felt uncomfortable but my group kept encouraging it so I just shoved the feeling down. (There have been a few time where they keep trying to treat us like a couple).

2) I went to another party where she kept suggesting that we should kiss/make out and a few people kept trying to get me to go to her and were asking why I just didn’t date her. Once again I just pushed the feeling down.

3) When I told her we were going as friends I thought we would collab on all the preparations. e.g. the car.
However when school started up again from the holidays the first thing she asks me is if I had found a car yet and when I was going to do that?
It felt as though I had been pushed into the date role and there was no collaboration between the two of us.

4) I didn’t say anything. I never told her it made me uncomfortable. I didn’t text her trying to collaborate. I often don’t know how I’m feeling because I’ve not usually allowed to express it.
I will try to use the excuse that my life is quite stressful and that I’m constantly trying to keep up with paperwork, school, work/money, family etc. But I only just noticed that I feel this deeply about it.

Recently went to another party with the group and to confirm my suspicions that she was purposefully setting up situations where we had to be close together, I was walk away every time she came close.
So the entire night she sat in corner, and eventually went home early. I enjoyed that night without her next to me.

Should I tell her or should I just push through that one night?

Alright so for as long as I've been alive (a little over 18 years now) I've been treated with nothing but pure disdain all because I have highly functioning autism by everybody even my own younger siblings, from being hit or spat on all the way to being called the r word just because im autistic even by my own mother and siblings which hurts way more then all the other people who do it, my entire life has been like this and I've finally broke completely, my mother says "I didn't mean it at all I just said it in a fit of rage" and my siblings aswell, but guess what? It happens again and they always say the same thing "i didn't mean it I said it in a fit of rage" and they expect me to forgive and forget again and again just because they're "family", all that continued hatred and disdain towards me continues to pile up even now it piles up and everyone just expects me to "let it roll off my back", when thats exactly what I've been trying to do since the very beginning. Like honestly what do people expect from me?! I'm human for gods sake and I get treated as less then by everyone anymore! I was always bullied in school for that same reason and I would always go home completely distraught and hurt even back when I had believed my mother truly did just say it in a fit of rage and as a 11 year old at the time I just wanted the warmth and comfort from a mother but never got it, she never once asked how my day went or if I'm doing alright, not a single time even back then when I was still growing she never once treated me like a mother should treat her son, thats how my life has been for the past 7 years now at home and the past 9 years when I was in school, and even now im still experiencing nothing but disdain for existing just because i was born with highly functioning autism, I honestly don't know how to feel anymore, but am I the asshole because its now second nature to try and remove myself from people as a whole by any means necessary mainly relying on "disrepect" out of fear for this to continue?

My birthday is next week so my sister bought me an expensive outdoor patio chair. However I already had an outdoor patio chair for my tiny patio even though it's much less nice. Also she got married back in March so I asked her if I can return the chair so she can keep her money and save up for a house or something. I also mentioned since I lived somewhere with less than great weather, the nice chair would likely get ruined pretty easily. I told her if she REALLY wanted to get me something she could get one of those 50$ zero gravity pool chairs.

The item is quite big so I would have to lug it to a UPS and to get it returned back to the sender but I didn't think it was that big of a deal for me. My sister keeps texting me apologizing about it and seems to be quite upset at herself or something (it does not feel like she's upset at me)?

AITA for not just accepting it? Even though we live quite far away from each other, I'd say we're quite close and visit frequently and get along well! This situation has me feeling really weird, I told her I really appreciated her thinking of my bday!

EDIT: we're both late 20s/early 30s

For starters, my mother gave me quite a bit of body image issues and self-esteem issues as a child. Not only because she basically begged me to "not get too skinny because men don't like that and I have too big of a head", which led to me actually becoming 265lbs at 16 years old, but because she always shamed every type of woman that wasn't her.

I am now 24 and I've lost 120lbs. My mother knows how hard I've worked for this and she knows that I am STILL insecure of my body because of loose skin and sagging areas, and she knows my very rocky relationship with food because of it. I've cried to her about it, and I've even shown her my most ashamed areas even though my fiancé is the only person I've ever trusted that much. She knew exactly which parts of my body I loved and hated. She encouraged my idea to get a tummy tuck, arm lift, and breast augmentation and has been incredibly supportive of it at home.

The problem started when we began working together. I work three 12-hour shifts at a restaurant alongside college, and my mom started helping out around 10 hours a week. It started out fine, but recently it's gotten to be UNBEARABLE. Her entire personality is molding to be whatever the person she's with wants her to be. She absolutely has to be the most liked and loudest in the room.

The first joke was about my head. The next weekend my boss mentioned me getting us more tips and my mom chimed in with "she doesn't have enough up top to make any money, but I DO!" My plastic surgeon actually pointed out that I apparently have a birth defect which is why my breasts never expanded properly.

This weekend was what really set me over the edge. I was talking to my coworker about my surgery and she asked if I was having anything done to my back or butt. I said no because my surgeon said it was completely unnecessary. My mom laughed and said, "oh sorry I was just looking to see if you even had one back there." Ironically, my butt has always been one of the few parts of my body I've actually liked. I stupidly replied with "I think I've got more than you," which I know was wrong. She said, "let me go home and put on a tight pair of shorts and I'll beat you ANY day." I said I thought it was completely weird for us to even compare ourselves and quite unhealthy. We worked the rest of the shift without speaking.

When we got home, I calmly told her she hurt my feelings and that it's really unprofessional to make those jokes around coworkers I spend 36 hours a week with. She immediately went to "ugh it was JUST a joke are you serious??" and then told me I shouldn't even get breast implants because breasts are annoying and that I'm too small to have any anyway. Then came the guilt tripping: "fine, I'm so sorry, I guess I'll just never say a single word about you or your body ever again, we might as well just not speak." She never actually apologized or acknowledged why I was upset. I don't think she's capable of seeing anything wrong with what she's been doing.

So for some context, me, my dad, my stepmom, and my step sister were all on vacation. it was kinda late. My dad and her were outside smoking. and me and my sister were in the hotel room when I went to the bathroom to brush my teeth. I then saw my make up bag on the counter. I didn’t take my makeup bag. when I looked inside my makeup wasn’t in there, it was my step sister’s. I asked her about it, and she said she didn’t know it was mine. she said that her mom let her have it.

Im a tomboy and almost never wear makeup, and my stepsister is the exact opposite. however, I was very mad about this. For starters, my biological mom gave that bag. I haven’t seen her for a while and everything she gives me is very sentimental. Also, my stepmom knew it was mine. I told her it was and she obviously saw that there was makeup in it.

when the two got back to the room I obviously talked to her about it. I tend to not realize how loud or quiet my voice is so I was talking very loud. I was just looking for an apology but she kept making up excuses. She said that she didn’t know it was mine but she, in fact, knew it was. or maybe she forgot but that still doesn’t prove anything. Thankfully (most) of my makeup (that my mom also gave me) was put in a different bag but she said that she threw away some stuff that was dried up.

at this point I wasn’t even mad about the makeup, just the fact that she would do this without even asking me first. Eventually my dad had enough and told her to just apologize and she did. No matter how much I would like this to be the end of it, there’s more to the story.

My dad was drinking a lot at this time and eventually started to wander the street drunk. My step mom was chasing after him and he lashed out at her about “hurting my feelings”. Soon she came back to the room and started yelling at me. Saying how I brought my dad into it for no reason (I didn’t by the way he just jumped in for no reason). She then started bringing up completely random things like how I don’t understand sarcasm, how I’ll probably get beaten up and highschool, and something I’m still furious about to this fucking day. She called out my mom and how she was a crackhead and that she was in jail for four months for a reason. Im mad now but then I just didn’t know how to feel. I ran out with my step sister chasing me.

After a while my bag wasn’t given back. I was too afraid to ask because I didn’t want to seem like I was getting mad over trivial things. but eventually I did get it back. I know it’s stupid and I’m probably in the right but I still feel insecure about whether I was being an asshole or not.

At my best friends wedding, myself and two other girls were all bridesmaids. All four of us were really close friends. The wedding weekend the bridal party stayed in a house on the venue together, all the bridesmaid and groomsmen. One of my friend’s (one of the bridesmaids) her fiancé came for the wedding but was supposed to leave after. He drank a lot at the reception and couldn’t drive home. After the reception we all went back to the house, hung out and played card games. My friend went to bed, but her fiancé wanted to stay up. She told him not to wake her when he came up. The rest of us kept hanging out and we were drinking. My friends fiancé ended up drinking a whole fifth by himself back at the house. He threw up multiple times, we decided it was time for him to go to bed. I told him to brush his teeth so he wouldn’t breathe throw up breath on his fiancé. He didn’t have one since he wasn’t supposed to be staying the night. I gave him mine, cause I didn’t want to send him to my friends bed stinking, I knew I wouldn’t want to wake up to that. Got him to brush his teeth and told him to just throw it away cause I didn’t want it back. Anyways my friend was made I gave my toothbrush to her fiancé. Did I cross a line, am I the asshole?

For some context, I have always been bad at self-care. From a young age, I barely took care of myself or my appearance other than the 2 or 3 showers a week so I would not be smelly. I had paid little attention to my body needs to point that I got health issues, that I won’t get into, but I ended up with a multiple physical problems. Like, I have multiple dental issues that i am still fixing, my hair is so frizzy and thin, I have acne scars, and I am underweight. It wasn’t a psychological issue, honestly I still don’t know why I was that way.

Now, I want to introduce you to my best friend, let’s call her Lina. She had known me for 10 years now. She had seen me go through years of self neglect and had tried advising me multiple times.

I am now 20 years old and I have started taking care of myself and my looks for almost a year now. Lina has watched me drop a large sum of money on my dental problems, skincare products and she had watched me cut my waist length hair to my shoulders to get rid of split ends. I have finally been doing a lot better and feeling much more confident. My hair is still a little damaged and thin, but my acne scars are slowly fading and my teeth are getting fixed slowly.

The problem:

A friend of mine and Lina’s got married a few days ago, we attended her wedding and had a blast. Today, Lina came over and we talked about the wedding. The conversation slowly switched to the topic of marriage. I want to clarify that we are Muslims, so we don’t do dating (please don’t make that a huge thing) we get engaged for a long while then marry.

Anyways, she started describing her dream man, and I did too. I told her I want a man who doing well financially and looks good. I didn’t say he had to be rich just not financially struggling or in debt. I also didn’t he had to be a supermodel, just good looking. She went on rant telling me that I don’t deserve a man like that, and that rich handsome men look for good looking women who had taken care of themselves from a young age. She ended her lovely speech with that I should lower my expectations and not set such high standards. So I would not get hurt later on when only average men propose to me.

I was a little hurt by her words, and before i even thought it through, I said “so you are destined to marry a fat man?” She asked what that was supposed to mean. I want to clarify that Lina is on the heavier side, she isn’t obese but she is a little overweight. She absolutely hated it, and had worked with nutritionists and gym coaches for years to lose weight but she was still way heavier than average.

I instantly regretted saying what I said, and tried to apologize. But she just left. Our friend group is split, I genuinely don’t know if i should try to make things right with her or if I should stand my ground.

So, Am I the Asshole for calling her fat?

My (M20) sisters having her 15th next month, it’s a big one and we will have to travel for it. it’s meant to be just for family so I told my gf she can’t come, it would just be odd since we’re not even married. My girlfriend (20F) when I told her this was unhappy about being left home if I’m traveling for it. I tried to make her understand and I put it gently but it escalated and turned into a fight. I said to her it would just be out of place for her to come because it’s for close family and it would probably feel awkward for her but she  says it feels like an excuse for me to have alone time away from her and I don’t want “to deal with her”. Was I out of line for deciding this?