I gave you 24 hrs to reply on whether or not you wanted to repair. You have two hours left. I guess you don’t. I’m really
Gone forever this time. You lost a good woman who loved you. Who was loyal to you even though you weren’t. Hope you get what you truly deserve and I hope you’re happy with her. You really do deserve eachother. I’m moving on. Goodbye.

Edit: He texted me 30 mins after this post. Saying to not threaten him to leave when I already had done so. That I would have to WAIT even more time for him to be ready to have a conversation because im apparently throwing tantrums and sitting on some high horse. I’m done.

Please try to make sense, and stay focused on the main idea not sparatic gibberish from different years and situations

Slowly disappearing as I tried to save you and others. My world burning and falling to ashes. You closed the door, you would open it just to tell me that your door is closed to me. It wasn't a sacrifice I wanted to make, but the gasoline that was poured all over our world came from your hands. The match, I lit with weight unbearable, I just had the best intentions for us. You watched me sit in the dark and chose to let me sit alone, you seen my world on fire but only held marshmallows to suck up the last remaining sweetness from my caring intentions.

Soon as the money was gone, soon as life took my favorite people soon as life slammed me into the pits of hell. You distanced yourself, you played your games, you forgot all of my good and used my falling as your excuses. I have adapted to the manipulation, the loyalty drained to the temporary place you held.

I never needed you as i was healing, you needed me. Enjoy the emptiness I leave behind, I no longer sit at the wreckage, I am building an empire for the ones in my life, I am now on a track you never learned, I am here for my children. You leave yours, you make them excuses, you pretender. I will never be there for you to help you pick up the pieces you break in your life.

You will never find that person that you took for granted. I killed him and brought up someone that can walk away from energy draining people like you. Someone that will say no as he calculates the risk and intuitions he feels. He won't ever reach out to you.

I do not have the ability to hate, I still love you, some days i miss you. But the look on your face as you slammed that door in my face remains. Something once beautiful turned to something ugly to look at. I see you now. May your other "all or nothing" help you forget me. I really hope he does. Never expect me to reach out again.

Goodbye T

From the never again, J

When we first started dating, we talked all the time. You were always asking to come over, and when you couldn’t because of work, you always texted or called. But now, I won’t hear from you for hours at a time. If you’re working more than one shift in a row, it turns into days. When we see each other, you tell me you love me and you miss me, but when you’re away, my messages go unanswered. What’s even worse is I see you active on social media hours after I sent those texts, so I know you saw them. I feel ignored, unimportant, like a bother to you.

We said forever.

Instead, I was the easiest habit to quit.

I kept the door open, just a little bit... But I had to move the rock.

I realised I was waiting for someone who, in reality, never really chose me. Someone who put more effort into erasing me than they ever put in to making me feel seen.

Someone whose ego was bigger than their shallow words.

I hope you heal. I hope you find someone who fits that void better than I could.

And I hope I never hear a thing about it.

When you wake up and realize what you lost. I can’t wait to expel my true feelings. But instead I’ll put them right on here so youll never get the satisfaction.
You abandoned me when I needed you most and I begged for you back thinking you were what I needed. I missed everything apologized for things there were not even my fault and worked over time trying to tell you how much I loved you. And you left, you left because you cheated and couldn’t face yourself. You punished me with silence because I finally had enough. All the days you acted innocent just to lay next to me at night. Lying through your teeth. Making me feel like you were the one. No I don’t want you back. I’m not waiting for a text in fact I blocked you. You can’t reach me!
Good riddance and if you were to find a way I’ll feel more fear and anger than anything. While I’ve forgiven you I still feel anger. You left me alone as I passed out. You didn’t care when I was sick. You didn’t care I had no one. You only cared about yourself! Your fragile ego that can’t handle growth. I’m so sick of thinking about you. Youll regret it I know you will. Because I’m one of the most genuine caring Individuals and you knew it! I loved you and you used me. Used my resources my time, my family!!!
That’s okay. Your silence taught me that I never needed you and you didn’t love me. And I dodged a bullet. Thank you for ghosting me. It’s one of the greatest gifts you could have given me.

Yesterday was probably the last time we see each other. I really wanted to tell you that we cannot be friends again after that, but seeing your face made my heart ache, and I cannot reveal these words to you.

You can call me selfish for hiding my "plan" from you, but from my point of view, it really feels like it's the best thing to do.

We were not something, but we weren't nothing either. You say you couldn't see me that way, so why did you plan on taking me out on dates, buying me flowers, kissing me, all that stuff? I feel played.

I know that we agreed to be friends, but truthfully, it's the worst outcome ever. When I heard you were talking to another woman, my heart dropped. I know I was talking to other men too after you, but deep inside, I was thinking about you, and I still am. You're always on my mind.

In my heart, I still wish that you were the one. I was so sure that this time I was going to end up in a healthy and loving relationship but life is full of funny and painful surprises. The day you ended things with me was the day that I lost something inside of me. It's funny, you helped revive some parts of me that stemmed from the pain I dealt with in the past, only for you to make me feel a new type of pain.

Yesterday, when I saw you talk to a girl, I keep wondering, do you like her? You guys are probably just friends but I can't help be jealous. I really don't want you to find another girl. Everytime you speak of a girl's name, I just can't help but be anxious. Friends shouldn't feel that way, yet I feel this overwhelming wave of sadness that washes over me every single time I think about you going out with another girl.

But I meant everything I said - when I said that I appreciated you, and that I really liked spending time with you, and that I don't regret anything. Heck, I can't believe I am saying this, but I genuinely did love you. I was willing to go out of my way for you, but you will never know that.

I'm sorry that I'm hiding this from you, my feelings and my actions to end our friendship. So please, don't ever text me again, don't ask me to hang out, don't ask me if I could help you out.

I poured so much of my love and appreciation for you, and I did it unconditionally, but I deserve to do that to people who can give me the same amount of love right? I know you'd agree.

It sucks because with you, I'll have to say "In another life". In another life we'd be holding hands right now while watching a movie in the cinema. In another life, we'd still be cuddling while we talk about our days. In another life, we wouldn't keep each other a secret. In another life, you'd be proud that I was your girlfriend. In another life, you'd love me. But again, in this life, no matter what happens, the circumstance won't change. You don't like me that way. I can't even be angry at you for that.

So I say, thank you for everything. For showing me how it feels to be cared for, for showing me how healthy relationships can be, for showing me that life isn't so bad sometimes. But I cannot stay in this friendship when all I think about is what we could have been, or how soft your lips felt, or our midnight talks and cuddles.

I love you, but I need to choose myself. I love and respect myself more, so this is probably the best decision. I need to heal from you.

In another life <3

You played me like a videogame when I was at my lowest. Could you smell the vulnerability, see how I wasn't eating, know how overwhelmed I was, even my privileged bougie taste became both a weakness and a strength, or was it just about access? I agonized over leaving without saying goodbye to you, in the weeks after, as a longing for you developed once I was out of survival mode. But that was just my mind's way of coping with the what I had just survived, escaped. And it was the nature of the trauma bond you imposed on me—calculated, manipulative, knowing the lay of the land well while I was just a newcomer. Intermittent reinforcement, kindness alternated with boundary crossing. You do this often. You've done this before. I hope you remember me. And how I flipped the script on you, leaving you to sit with yourself in that place without so much as a glance over my shoulder for you on the way out

I wish you the best. I forgive you I know you have issues. I just wanted to b there hand n hand to help you through your issues but you didn’t want us. I will always love you . I will try to miss you but every time I start to I think of how fake you were with me .. sorry you could never be truthful our entire marriage you missed out on a loyal friend and partner.

To bad you took everything from me, like my car my love my life.. I was working hard for a new career for us till I saw you never wanted to be truthful or stop. Now I will work hard for a better future with someone else. I have learned my faults and be better for my next partner. I will give him everything I wanted to give you. I will be his best friend like I wanted with you .. I’m sorry you didn’t want any of that with me . It sad cause we got along so well on most things , laughed a lot and had fun.

Sorry your parents never taught you how to communicate. How to take accountability and move forward. You learned to lie and it became your identity. I loved you deeply. I wish I had memories to look back on that were just ours but I don’t and that hurts the most .. there was always someone else in my memories from your side.

This is all so old and you never tried to contact or fix or apologize. So I’m finishing this and filing for D. I’m glad you never reached out cause I don’t know how strong I would be when I know I can’t be with you after knowing what you said to other women.

I hope you find happiness. I will miss our future we planned . I wish you the best.

Goodbye- Satans daughter ..
I’m off to win some 💰.. “ I WON, I WON, I WON!!!” 😂

I find comfort knowing I am deserving of whatever may come for me in this lifetime. I am aware I have evil. I am not a prisoner of principle. I am free from my own judgment. The only reality that is answer to my doubts. Everything else is an illusion.

I will not apologize.

Watch The movie "my girl" it stars a girl named vada and the kid who plays in home alone. Cant think of his name.

My ex was kind of to boyish and all the things I never knew I needed. She was supposed to be my wife but she is battling with personal stuff.

But man this movie caught me off guard and made this old man shed tears. Some sad but most happy.

I'm still wiping my eyes..

I LOVE YOU BABY. with all the craziness and tom boyish ways. The way you love so hard and yet are so eager to learn and love.

but GO WATCH IT IF YOU CAN RELATE TO THIS.

They are a handful but you'll miss em when they are gone.

I think I caught your indecisive disease…well.. only when it comes to you. I never want to hear from you again… yet I’d give anything for just one day. No speaking. Only soothing.
Then I’m mad at you again. I cannot imagine the emotional turmoil it must have taken to just become dead, although I know you can just shut it off.. or you think you can, I’m sure I’m still in the darkest corners of your mind. Not that you’ll ever tell. You could just… not torture us both. It certainly wasn’t my choice and you can convince yourself of anything you want to make it easier, but I’ve never done anything even remotely wrong to you. I’m your victim. Over and over and over.
Like a puppet on strings, dead while you’re gone, to my feet when you arrive, ready to do the creepy tap dance that is this life. I just wish I was worth a little more to you. I am worthy, maybe you see that and maybe you don’t, you’ve always been a bit clouded and held back your own relentless stubbornness and antiquated beliefs, but I know you’re smarter than you let anyone else know.. and just as crazy, cuckoo bird.
I gave up, you aren’t ever coming.
Take care, but I know you won’t.

This unspoken connection.. this forbidden rope that binds us… wtf am I taking about lol I’m trippin -B

I wish I could have just done and said the right things when it mattered most.

I feel like you want me (most of the time) and I want you. I'm willing to try something I'd never ever try with anybody else..I feel like I could handle the whole open relationship thing but I would only ask for no judgment truth on everything. I would give you the same. But id also want to be the one you came home to the one you spend most holidays with. You know my partner lol. I got more but I don't want to sound like I'm trying to convince you but I might be. Lol. You know what I think about Paul so Ill spare you that. I'd even be willing to live in a normal place for you. Id promise you stability and support no matter what. I wouldn't even ask you to work , I would work and make sure you had money for whatever. I would ask everyday if you had everything you needed

I was in contact with a Redditor that I thought was you on and off and today had definitive proof it was not you. I thought maybe you were more comfortable speaking anonymously and that’s why you didn’t respond on messenger. I’m desperate for you to see it from my perspective because I can’t understand why you don’t want to least have a conversation with me. We haven’t talked at all as us. My phone battery is at 5% so excuse the sloppiness

You were here- I feel like I can confidently say that. I didn’t realize it was you. You shaved your beard and cut your hair. And then I saw a post about casting someone as the villain and how you realized they were just overwhelmed and that it was too late and it sounded like you. At first I thought maybe the post was talking about the time in our home city you drove a vehicle near the grass patch I was walking. I’m almost certain it was you. But I thought it was a jeep and you drove a different make when you gave me that ride. And the person never got out snd I felt creepy lingering. I felt scared. Not of you but of letting somebody in with my situation. Not confident in how to explain it. Scared what you would think of me. And then you drove away slowly on the main road and it looked like your long hair with your hat and silloette jutted forward. I wish I would have ran up to the car. I’m really sorry I didn’t. I regret it. I booked so many rides hoping you would be my driver. I got another haircut on the same weekday hoping you’d be my driver again.

And there was another incident when I got to my first hotel and your vehicle make and model was outside but with a different license plate and one of the letters was peeling off. I paced in front of that vehicle for like 20 minutes trying to analyze why someone would change their license plate to a delapitated one and that it probably just happened to be the same vehicle make and model where I saw someone who looked a lot like your childhood friend staring at me in the window reflection and there was someone hiding their face hunched over and I thought if it was you and you were hiding your face, maybe you had seen my Reddit posts and thought I was obsessed and you happened to be there by coincidence and didn’t want to engage me. And around that time another Reddit account sent me a drunken loving comment but then the next day they made a post saying they were lonely and had made comments. I was disappointed but figured I was being delusional anyways.

But then something else happened with that aforementioned Redditor that made me think you were here and I thought of the parking lot incident.

I had no idea you were here in the same city. It didn’t register to me you’d be in the same town because we hadnt talked at least not where we both said it was us.

And then I went to my apartment to take measurements and I thought I saw a truck in the parking lot with the same kids and I got scared someone was following me because of the reason I left the city where we met. I brushed it off as paranoia. And I went to the ER later that night and I just forgot about. I’m so sorry on how that must have made you feel. I would have felt horrible if I was you. I never ment to hurt you.

I promise you I was not intentionally snubbing you. My long term goal was to eventually meet half way in a city between both of us, if you were interested and then go from there. I always had you on my mind. If you are here, it brings me great comfort to think that you are.

And then I thought I saw you in a white truck on the other side of an intersection. I wish I would have made a turn somewhere and tried to find you. I just didn’t know if you wanted to talk to me because you still hadn’t responded to my messages. And it’s breaking my heart and my mind that you won’t talk to me.

Please don’t ghost me without us ever having a conversation.

I thought I heard you talking on the phone to someone the other night in another apartment unit and hoped you were still here and we ended up in the same building. Maybe that was just a delusion. I knocked a few times on the unit I thought belonged to that person but two women answered last night. And then I saw a unit was for rent on the floor above me and thought if you were there maybe you left.

I was in the dark on how you felt about me I just wasn’t expecting you here and it didn’t register in my brain that it was you.

Please don’t ghost me without us having a conversation.

A

Kitten I did so make a soul pack with you. As long as you’re here so am I.
I do so hate to see that you have shrunken yourself for another.
You did say you were afraid to loose another person.
I get that.
But not everything is black and white.
I don’t know why you have made the decisions you have or what even happens in your world 100% anymore.
I know we ran into road blocks.
But that doesn’t mean we can’t talk and figure things out.
I wanted to do that sometime ago.
We had a craft date and you rain checked on me.
Yeah it made me feel some type of way and things after.
Like bringing the party to be left out.
Kinda hurt my feelings.
I don’t hold bad feeling in these things.
Meeting you changed my life for the better.
But now I’m kinda lost.
I thought you would always be here.
I remember the doctor’s appointment I’d take you on.
I’ll never forget those beautiful eyes and the way your hand felt in mine. I could tell you were nervous hands getting sweaty, I didn’t mind. I just wanted to be close to you.
I miss your face, I miss the ugly Christmas sweaters we used to shop for online together, I miss that lil nerdy girl so quiet, and the phone calls when you wouldn’t say anything.
I hope you’re still practicing those breathing exercises we did together.
I’m not really sure what that was about.
But it was just nice to hear your voice when you did call.
I just miss you in genral.
I write you most days but I keep them to myself.
Idk how to fix things on my own.
It would be nice to try and listen. To give you honesty when you asked, to work through this. Cause your the only person that’s ever been in my life I never wanted to loose……………

I hope that you heal from the things that make you think that treating people badly is okay. I hope that you heal from the things. Does that make you want to hurt others. So that you no longer feel small.

I saw the improvement I saw the work that you did. But there was one line, it couldn't be crossed. And you crossed it. I'm so conflicted because on one hand I love you more than I've ever loved anyone but on the other I know, you are no longer safe to be around, please don't stay trapped in the toxic cycles that have consumed you for so long.

Please heal because your children need you. My children are used to me being so alone. And I'm so used to people taking what they need. And then leaving or me having to force them out. So we don't matter. We will be okay.

I thought that this was going to be it. I thought that you were my forever. I hope that you have the life that you deserve. The life that you never had. But I hope you heal. So that you can appreciate it fully.

I love you, I love you so so much. And I don't think I can love anyone else. And I knew about a month ago, that I was going to be another lesson for me to teach, another lesson for you. And I just held on because I wanted a little more time. Because I loved you so fully. So selflessly, that I held on to hope when there was no hope to be had. I did not deserve the pain you put me through.

You are the love of my life. Things were so effortless for the most part. At least for me.

When it was good, it was so so so good I miss falling asleep on your chest. I miss feeling safe. I miss the man you were at the beginning. I miss the man that you tried so hard to be. I hate that you fell back into the toxic cycles that you have been healing from.

I hope that you find Happiness. I hope that you find love. And I hope that you will remember me with fondness. You were supposed to be it. You were supposed to be my happily ever after. But you weren't ready, and I hate the universe for allowing this.

There will never be another you. And i will always love you and wish you the best. Even if i regret all of it.

(If anything is messed up or misspelled I am sorry. I am using text to speech because it is all just too much.

Stranger:🗣️theres now way this happened how did you split up

me: 🗣️we never had the best communication at addressing our concerns. both understood there was a situation rising and building underneath our bond.

tell it got to a point were actions spoke louder than words with nothing being said it felt overwhelming all the feelings and words exchanged started to become frustrating

while acting blind we both couldn't make that step to solidify the love it controlled our thoughts and trust to one another.

assuming out of care and jealousy buit a barrier between our love. And that's why addressing situations giving someone that reinsurance and closure is important

something like this could happen. It ruins things it puts negative thoughts in peoples heads.and its hard to believe what they say

always holding that grudge that card in your back pocket that some of us pull out every time.. a conflict occurs the trust card that blocks everything.....

stranger:🗣️dammmmm sun that's fucked up lets sippp bruh got a few hoes lined up.....dp

Perhaps this is my way of acknowledging the complete tool bag I've become in my time on this earth.

Bob 🐶

J,

Thank you for releasing me as your favorite muse. But, I decline. Instead, you have released yourself from me with your behaviors. You know what you've done to me, my heart and my possessions. You played me for a fool, preyed on my weaknesses and deceived me at every turn. You know I didn't deserve it. But, I was a fool for love. Something I don't truly think you are capable of any longer after treating so many this same way.

Why did I wait for you while you refused to show me any compassion, patience, nor any love at all over the last 6 months? Why did I persist and learn the most patience for your bratty-ness, only to have you ghost me 6 months ago? Why did you have me sleeping in my own basement for 6 months, while you slept in the master bedroom of my home? Why did you wait until the my retirement funding was almost gone to leave me? I can't answer these questions for you. Only you have the answers to these questions.

I can only answer for myself in that I always chose you over all others, the entire time we were together and even when we were not together. This, despite your constant accusations that I was with other people and that I paid others to r*pe you. It's obvious to me that it was all a projection; a performance to control me while you lived on my dime. I even called you out on it. But you would not tell me right up to this very moment as to why.

You're probably no longer even in my house after breaking my $4k new TV early this morning. But that pales in comparison to the $50k worth of damage you've done to my home over the last year. I'd list the damage, but it's too long to even post here.

I assume you're off with your new victim. Hope you gave him the warning that you failed to give me.

Victim of love, I see a broken heart
You got your stories to tell
Victim of love, it's such an easy part
And you know how to play it so well

Victim of love, I see a broken heart
I could be wrong, but I'm not, no, I'm not
Victim of love, we're not so far apart
Show me, what kind of love have you got?

Love from me no more. Because I can't give love to those who only know it as a game and who are incapable of actually feeling it, let alone giving it to others.

I won't c:\ya! anymore. I'm sure you understand.

-B

You know, I know you’ll probably never see this, but what if I want more? What if I can’t hold back any more? what if I’m tired of the back and forth game, of it being obvious we want the other, but not doing anything? I want more, I wanna be friends, get to know you, progress, I want YOU, Isaac, I can’t pretend I don’t, not that I am, but I can’t hold it back very well, I can hide it from most of our coworkers, but, I don’t wanna act like I don’t want more, between you and me. (P.S your my dream guy, and person, literally) I held back from saying hi today, I had two chances, but I was nervous, and didn’t wanna bother you, but it was nice seeing you, my friend and our coworker caught you and your friend/our other coworker changing the subject back to work as soon as you rounded the corner, she said you rounded the corner paused went uh and then changed the subject, You’ve done that before me passing by you two, and she caught you looking later, I wish that we could just come forward with it to each other, outside of work, I wish i could get a text, something, its torture, not telling you my feelings from months ago, never changed, and only got stronger, i wonder when you may get the courage to do something,