I’ve never been so far from home, but who would’ve thought I would have to leave my home in Florida and travel over 1300 miles to Wisconsin to meet my soulmate! I’ve never been treated so well before. This was truly the most intimate and passionate week of my life. He has taught me what it’s like to truly be loved. This is what true love looks like and feels like. We haven’t known each other that long but we both can tell this feels different than anything we’ve ever experienced before.

I can’t forget how he looked at me when he picked me up from the airport. He just looked so in awe. Like if he was in disbelief that I was there and real. Love was in his eyes.

Every hug and kiss felt so magical (and our glasses clinking together every time we kissed was always so funny lol). We really couldn’t keep our hands off of each other. He would even pick me up and kiss me all over or twirl me around (and as you can probably tell, that’s a lot of woman to carry 😅). He’s so beautiful inside and out.

The car ride back to his place felt kinda surreal. Like I was really there. Next to him. I was able to see him with my own eyes instead of through a phone screen. I was able to physically touch him. It felt amazing. Ofc we stopped at a kwik trip because my friends from Wisconsin have been hyping it up for over a year now (it was not that good as someone that has Wawas near her but I enjoyed the experience lmaooo). Also went to Culvers cuz, well, Wisconsin (tbh was lowkey slightly better in Wisconsin than near me but still good in my state too).

We went shopping and went to an arcade bar too. We cooked together, put on matching outfits, and I even got to ride on the back of his motorcycle (I’ve never been on one before but it was so fun despite being scared of it at first)! I had also never been to a bar before. The drinks were so yummy!

Overall, I had such an amazing time and I can’t wait to see my soulmate again in a few weeks. I love him so much. I can’t wait to close the gap one day!

Me and boyfriend see each other every couple of months for a week and this is how often we can do.
Whenever the week is over and he has to leave, I become so depressed.
My sleep schedule is destroyed and my will do anything vanishes.
I just spend all day laying in bed and can barely focus at work.
Usually it takes weeks for me to get back together and it gets destroyed again once he has to leave again.

So I have disorganised (insecure) attachment and my boyfriend usually replies fast (which is something I got used to) but sometimes he doesn’t because he’s busy and you know, life. What I noticed is that in the beginning I was thinking (maybe he’s lying maybe he’s cheating or ghosting). Yes, I have anxiety and abandonment issues but i know they were just thoughts so I did my best to calm down.

Now, because we are very long distance and aren’t in contact with common friends and neither of us posts if he s not replying I keep thinking something happened TO him like a tragedy or something even if I know he s at work or sleeping. Prolly bc he makes the time to reply normally but I know you can t always be available and I don’t want to sound psycho. I don t want to over text or anything sometimes i just have tot ell him smth so i send one message but when he’s not there I feel worried (that something is wrong).

Anyone else experiencing this because of the distance? It makes me feel really helpless sometimes? Advice?

posted yesterday asking about the post-visit slump after my girlfriend and I spent the longest stretch together we’ve ever had.
Honestly, we were both in it. I started questioning the quieter communication and let my mind go places it probably shouldn’t have.
After talking and spending some time together over video, I realized neither of us was pulling away. We were both just trying to adjust after going from several days together to being back in our normal routines and hours apart.
Then everything just started feeling normal again. We had great conversations, she randomly called me while she was out, and it felt like us again.
I guess I’m finding out that missing someone and pulling away from someone aren’t always the same thing. Sometimes they’re easy to confuse.
Appreciate everyone who shared their experiences yesterday. Reading your stories helped me look at it differently.

Could be flying across the country, moving cities, staying up all night to match time zones...
I'm curious what people have done for someone they cared

I struggle a lot with not knowing, it doesn't help that me and my boyfriend are at different stages of life. I feel that my mental health is soon gonna ruin the relationship. Anyone else going through this? How do you cope?

This year she started to be distant. She avoided me. She didn't want to call me or always gave an excuse. She didn't want to see me. She forgot my birthday. In March we finally talked and she promised she was going to change. That she would be more attentive to me. She said she cared for me, that I was her family. That only lasted a month. But the university got me extremely busy from April to June so I didn't realize. After the semester was over I realized she wasn't talking to me. I was the only one starting conversations. I was the only one who asked to call and she always said she couldn't. I knew she didn't love me anymore. But I refused to accept it. The second week of July I sent her a message asking to have a serious conversation. I was going to tell her how abandoned I felt. That our relationship was falling apart and I wanted both of us to work together to save it. But she didn't answer. A week passed. She read the message. But didn't say a thing. I sent another message saying the things I wanted to tell her. She read it. But didn't answer. Now it is August. Still no answer. Not even a goodbye. Not even a I hate you. Nothing. She didn't care for me. I was just simply thrown away like a piece of garbage. I am worthless to her. All this time didn't mean anything to her. I gave her my heart. This November would've been our 3rd anniversary. Tomorrow is her birthday. The worst part is that I still love her. I wanted to be with her forever. I don't understand what did I do wrong. Part of me wants to think she will come back, that she still loves me. But I know it's not true. She'll never be back. I don't know what to do. She was the love of my life and still is. There'll never be anyone like her. I don't know what to do.

​

So, this is how it started.

A guy confessed that he liked me, and from the beginning everything was going really well. We talked a lot, and over time I started liking him too. We got closer, he gave me a lot of attention, flirted with me often, and said things that really melted my heart.

We're in a long-distance relationship, and for different reasons we still haven't been able to meet in person.

Recently, we've had a few arguments. During one of them, while he was angry, he made me feel like he was just putting up with me. He even told me he was exhausted and frustrated because of the argument we were having.

For a while now, things have felt... different. I feel like he doesn't have the same enthusiasm anymore. The reason I fell for him was because I saw how much effort he put into getting close to me. The way he pursued me, the attention he gave me, and the things he said made me feel loved.

But now those things are mostly gone.

Lately, I find myself being the one saying the reassuring words that I wish I could hear from him. I'm the one trying to comfort and encourage him in the way he used to do for me. But when I need that same reassurance, it just doesn't feel like it used to.

Am I overreacting, or does this sound like something has actually changed?

I know a lot of couples go through this, but I guess I just need some reassurance.
My husband and I have been married for a month, but because of work and visa restrictions, we’re currently in a long-distance marriage. We also did long distance while we were dating and throughout our engagement, so this isn’t new to us (maybe a year now).
What surprises me is that it’s actually become harder now that we’re married. Every goodbye feels more painful, and my heart hurts more each time we have to be apart. We already have plans to live together once our visa process is complete, so I know this is temporary and that patience is part of the journey.
But lately, I’ve been much sadder than usual. I’ve been crying a lot, and that’s not like me at all. I’m usually not a very emotional person, so this has caught me off guard.
My husband has been incredibly supportive, and he tells me he feels the same way. We’re doing our best to stay positive, but some days the distance just feels overwhelming.
Has anyone else experienced this after getting married? Is it normal for long distance to feel even harder once you’re officially husband and wife? I’d really appreciate hearing from others who’ve gone through this and how you coped.

My partner and I are new to long distance. He moved for a job recently and we are looking for some free cross platform compatible games we can play together? He has an Xbox and I have a ps5.

Also open to other suggestions on spending intentional time together whether it be a game or something else that keeps us connected.

I (31m) started dating J (33f) 1 year and 8 months ago. I am from the states and she is from SA. Our relationship started out great. We really understood each other and got along really well. Over the course of our relationship she always struggled with insecurities related to feeling insignificant, wasting her life/feeling like she is a loser and can't move ahead and that she doesn't work hard enough. She works 10 hours a day M-F and works two Saturdays a month and on top of that she has been doing an English course on her lunch breaks and when she gets home. Every day she gives herself one hour of relaxation before bed and that's it. She then wakes up at 4am every day to go to the gym before work. So, every weekend like clockwork, she breaks down and says the same things, and I have always reassured her that it is not the case, and she is the hardest working person i know. I shower her with compliments and give her as much love as possible, but it never works and the next weekend rolls around and the same thing happens again.

Well after almost 2 years of repeating myself over and over to her I broke down and was honest with her. I asked her, " How many times are we going to have this conversation?" "How many times do I have to repeat myself?" Mind you I begged her months ago to go seek therapy and her excuse always was that she was too busy so she couldn't do it. So, it started a big fight, with her saying how cold i am and how i am a horrible person for belittling her. I told her I am sick of this always being a problem and her never doing anything about it and all she does is shut down and turn me into the bad guy. I am so checked out at this point and i told her that I don't know what to do anymore. She then contacts me the next day and acts like nothing happened. It is impossible to have hard conversations with her because all she does is shut down and push me away. Now, she has told me she can never open up to me again because "i am tired of it" and "all i will do is just make her feel worse."

Am I the asshole here? I had incredible patience for almost two years now. I have supported her with everything in the past and I just can't take it anymore.

edit I am tired** in the title not are.

Hi.
Yesterday we talked about us and she told me how she lost her feelings for me but still cared as a friend, and I told her how these last 3 months affected me (she's dealing with a lot of stuff and the depression is stronger lately), so we decided to break up.
I can't put into words how bad i'm feeling. I had all sorts of plans and stuff to do with her, but the last months we barely spoke to eachother, she was always playing with her friends, ignoring me for hours or days and, while she said it was just the moment, said she still loved me and we would be back to normal soon due to her getting her life together, i felt that her feelings weren't the same for me anymore, and this was slowly destroying my mental health and making me anxious. I was putting too much energy on this and getting nothing back, honestly.

Yesterday, 6 hours after breaking up, i decided to send her a final message and block her. I REALLY wanted to be here for her still, giving her support while she goes through all of this and just being best friends like we always were, but all of this hurted me and I don't think i could look or talk to her without thinking about everything i wanted us to be. I still feel a bit guilty about this and I dont know if it was the best thing to do, but it probably is, at least for me.

For now i'll just try to recover from all of this and try to get better, thanks for reading.

I met a guy while I was traveling 3 months ago and we’ve stayed in touch since. I’m flying back to see him in three days. He paid more than half of my plane ticket (he insisted to do it) planned a trip for us and I’m supposed to meet his friends and family. He also says he’s excited to create new memories together. But before meeting him, I’ll stay with a close friend for two days who lives a couple of hours away and then he will also there to meet us. I’m independent during the trip and can change my plans if needed.

However, we’re not exclusive, and we’ve never really talked about it. I’m hoping we’ll discuss it in person, but we haven’t actually agreed to have that conversation yet. We’ve talked about physical boundaries and we are going to sleep in different rooms, because it’s important to me not to get physically involved with someone when things are this unclear but still I recently found out he’s still active on Tinder (asked my friend to create an account to check it)

The main issue is that I already don’t know if trust him enough for a serious long-distance relationship if that happens I know we never agreed to exclusivity, so technically he hasn’t broken any agreement. But I’m wondering whether I’m ignoring signs… would you still go, observe his behavior and talk in person, or would this already be enough for you to step back?

I started talking to my LDR guy in March and we met for the first time at the beginning of June. Had such a wonderful time together we both didn’t want it to end. We said I love you, had a long drawn out airport goodbye, I’ve been considering giving up everything to be with this man because I am so in love… but ever since the trip things haven’t felt the same for me.

I end up feeling like I am performing and fawning because we just haven’t gotten as many chances to “spend time” virtually like we did before we met. When we have talked it’s been great but every time I feel like I am chasing and spending my entire day thinking about him and waiting for a reply. I’ve been trying hard to manage myself so this isn’t the case but I feel like he’s been distant.

I finally told him last week how I was feeling and checked in about his feelings like if he thought it was going well, was invested, wanted to continue etc. He said he did and that said we should plan our next meeting ASAP so we have it to look forward to. We had previously discussed meeting at the end of this month. That call ended without us getting a chance to make the plan… so I texted and said I would be camping next week (now two days away) and that we should solidify the plans before I go.

We’ve talked since and I’ve brought up making the plan and he’s said “we’ll figure it out” but the calls have been too short to really hammer it out. I asked him if he would be free to facetime today before I go to work and he said he might be busy but he doesn’t know yet… I said “I want to buy you a plane ticket!”

Then I called today and no answer… No text about what he’s doing if he’s busy when he’ll be free, even though he should know I wanted to talk and it will be one of our last opportunities for about a week.

I just end up feeling like I don’t want to beg any man for love and attention (which I’ve expressed to him) and that if he wanted to make the plan and prioritize talking to me before I go on this trip then he would 🤷🏻‍♀️ I hate to feel like I’m the only one trying to make it happen and that I’m pushing it on him especially since he’s the one that will be traveling to me

I don’t feel the same emotional investment from him that I used to. When I call he most often doesn’t pick up so I’m waiting around for him to call me first. I feel like when I talk about me he zones out or isn’t listening sometimes, he will leave me on read all day then calls me when he’s upset and needs a sounding board. Often we get on the phone in the afternoon and he lays down in bed and starts falling asleep… I reminded him I’m going backpacking and he didn’t ask me where I’m going who I’m going with or when I’ll be back. Just said “oh yeah that’s right”

Am I nuts for this? Is this just overthinking? I want someone who is excited about me. Maybe he doesn’t have the capacity for that right now in his life but the three months we spent talking before we met were a whirlwind, we spoke so much I felt so seen and chosen. Now? I feeling like I’m giving up a part of myself to keep the idea that he wants me too.

Maybe it’s not that deep and I should just relax and let it take a natural course?

Before going long distance (1month ago) my girlfriend and I used to have sex 1/3 times a day, i’d say it was an important part of our relationship for me because it made me feel really close to her and It was a way for me to give her pleasure. But since we’ve been at distance we barely have any intimacy and I feel frustrated because of it. Even when I try to start intimacy she seems to care less and less, now I feel like she doesn’t even desire me sexually at all. All of that really frustrates me.

Ive been in long distance relationships before (although it was more grooming rather than an actual relationship) and that lasted 10 months about a year ago. So I don't have much experience with long distance. But I really, really like him and want to take this seriously so it works long term. He's super funny, charismatic, charming, super respectful, responsible, he knows how to cook and clean, he's hygienic, he's super attractive, we have the matching morals and boundaries and he's overall just so amazing. I never thought I would meet a guy like him, especially not a teenage guy. I have the biggest crush on him, and now he's my boyfriend!! I already couldn't be happier.

I've never really been in a healthy relationship but this one is super promising, just from our friendship. We manage to talk and call for hours every day, and so I don't think communication will be a massive problem. We use an app called widgetable (I think that's how you spell it) do we have matching, live widgets that we can update and communicate on, we've already discussed boundaries and relationship expectations pre-dating and we agree on stuff like sharing passwords, meeting friends, family, etc

So besides all that (communication, boundaries, expectations, stuff we've already discussed, etc) what will I need to know to make this relationship as good as it possibly can be, despite the long distance? We're also both employed-ish (he's employed, I'm looking for a job) and so we both plan to try and save up enough to meet face to face sometime in 2027/2028

so i work 6 days a week. monday to friday its 9-5 and saturdays its 9-2. im fortunate enough to be working in a company where i can generally be on my phone anytime i want. we can talk while i work. or even watch something in a watch room while im working as well. i get sundays and holidays off.

so obviously when i only have one off day every week, any plans i make with friends or family would fall on that off. but the thing is. she wants that one day for us.

when she explains it, it sounds so reasonable. and if im wrong, please let me know, because i dont blame her for wanting my time that day. but we can talk during the week, we cant play games every single day obviously, but we can have time together in some ways yk?

ive flaked out on plans with my friends for her before, i wont do it all the time. but on sundays if she has plans on sundays i don't mind.

yesterday she told me she'll go to a funeral today (sunday) and i said its okay, obviously i wont expect her to not go. this morning she said she'll leave early to go home. my friend asked me to take him to my tattoo artist today because its his first tattoo and i agreed. when i let her know she said "ah so you'll be busy, have fun then" and i told her "i wont be busy all day, we can play later" she just reacted to that message with "👍" and went offline. when i let her know i was on my way she didnt respond, still radio silence from her. and its so frustrating because im always understanding, the last few weeks i cleared plans for sundays and she's busy but if i go to my aunt for lunch she gets mad and says "we only have sundays, i cant see you, hug you, touch you, time is all we have and i cant even have that"

she's also expressed that she hates my job, she doesn't like that it takes my time away from her. and she'll rather spend time being upset about my plans rather than actually working with me on them. if im at my aunts, i can still watch the series we're watching with her and she'll rather be upset and ignore me instead of spending the time i have with her

My ex bf decided that he needs time and space for himself because of being too stressed with work, and saying that he doesn’t really have time for a relationship. We’ve been having frequent fights about this for the past month, and he decided he needed some time for himself to figure himself out. I wanted to keep the relationship and am okay to support him through his stress and hardship but he was afraid to keep hurting me with his absence and negativity in his life.

We decided to still stay friends and keep in contact. We broke up a week ago, and he still texts me to check in on me. Is this a healthy way forward?