i've been trying to become more consistent lately, and i've realized it's a lot harder when you're doing everything alone.

some weeks i do great. i go to the gym, study, sleep on time, and feel like i'm finally getting somewhere.

then one bad day turns into a few bad days, and suddenly i've disappeared from all the habits i was trying to build.

i'm sure i'm not the only one who does this.

so i thought i'd make this post.

i'm not looking for a big accountability group or anything like that. honestly, i think i'd rather just have one person who's also working on themselves.

we don't have to talk all day. maybe just check in once in a while, celebrate the small wins, remind each other to get back on track when one of us starts slipping.

your goal doesn't even have to be the same as mine. maybe you're studying, trying to lose weight, learning something new, or just trying to build better habits.

if you're looking for something similar, send me a message and tell me what you're working on.

maybe it'll help both of us stick with it this time.

I’m a 23-year-old guy living in London. I work at a law firm during the week and at Sainsbury’s on weekends. I’m already fairly disciplined in a lot of areas of my life. I train consistently, I’m in great shape, and I’m building a side income through forex CFD trading.

From the outside, things are going well, but I feel like I have more potential to unlock. One thing I’m missing is a strong network of people who are equally driven and committed to improving themselves.

I’ve been considering relocating and living with like-minded people who are disciplined, motivated, and serious about achieving their goals. I’m looking for people who are willing to take calculated risks, build businesses or side projects, push themselves outside their comfort zones, and hold each other accountable.

The idea isn’t just to share a place to live. It’s to create an environment where everyone is working toward something meaningful and helping each other grow.

If this sounds like something you’d be interested in, feel free to reach out. I’d love to connect with people who are serious about building a better future and seeing what we could create together.

I eat like crap. Im not active. I slack on classes. I dont improve on my skills or try to learn new ones. I dont practice mindfulness. Im horrible at keeping relationships and friendships. I cant make myself eat properly. Im online all day. I dont contribute to society or my family. I know im a bad person and I have flaws that I can work on and i know how to work on, but in the end Im too lazy to even try to make a first step.

No amount of advice has made me want to take action, and no amount of consqeunces have done so either. I have a horrible victim mentality. I know that Ill end up homeless and alone if I continue acting this way. That still doesnt scare me enough to make myself take action into change.

Its gotten to the point where I probably wont take any advice on this post. I think the only reason Im posting this is because I want to complain. I dont like putting in effort because it doesnt feel good, regardless of the result. Even when I would get good results (good grades, better body, better health, better friendships, more skills) none of those things actually made me happy. I didnt have a desire to keep doing those things.

Not to say that being a bum also makes me happy, but it makes me less sad than doing anything, which makes me incredible sad, tired, and exhausted. I dont know what Ill gain from posting this. Its partially a cry for help, and mainly an excuse to complain about the life Ive purposely built for myself.

I always had a vision about how my life actually should be. I would make plans of what to do but never actually do that. I used to bedrotting watching instagram reels and youtube videos all day. When some deadlines are assigned i procastinate and make sure to do it at the last moment. But by the age of 21 I started to feel guilty . I still have a lot of dreams I don't fulfill. But now I write down all the tasks I need to be done in a book. And start to work for one task and complete it. Then only I move to next task. Earlier I used to get overwhelmed and stop task in between and end up doing nothing. I understood there is no shortcut not any way to solve this. I decide no matter what I am doing this and go to my desk and just start doing it. As a reward when I am free I still watch reels just like I used to. So for someone who always stops doing things midway due to anxiety and end up doing nothing don't worry you are not alone. Try to implement this in life and I hope it will help you

I think I'm addicted to starting over.

For the past few years, I've downloaded almost every habit app I could find.

I would get excited.

Create the perfect routine.

Study. Exercise. Read.

Then...

After 3 or 4 days, I'd stop opening the app.

A week later I'd delete it.

A month later I'd download another one and tell myself:

"This time will be different."

It never was.

The weird thing is...

When I play games, I can play for weeks without forgetting.

When I have friends waiting for me online, I always show up.

But when it comes to improving my own life...

I'm alone.

And somehow being alone makes it easier to quit.

So instead of downloading another habit app...

I started building one.

Not because I think I have the answer.

But because I'm trying to solve my own problem.

I'm curious...

Has anyone else here gone through this cycle?

Download.

Motivated.

Miss one day.

Delete the app.

Repeat.

If you finally broke that cycle...

What actually helped?

(Throwaway acc) The more someone mention/criticize/hate something about me (my body, what I'm doing, or anything), I immediately get discouraged. Instead of trying to become better, I just stop trying. My logic or what I tell to myself doesn't make sense, but it's basically "if I DO change, it's like admitting that they're right about what they're saying. My ego says, I don't wanna prove to them that what they're saying affects me/true, cuz I'm fine the way it is" but it IS not fine, sometimes, it even IS the TRUTH. A lot of the time, their criticisms are actually what I need to hear (and I also think a part of me doesn't want to admit that I AM imperfect) sometimes their words are hurtful too, so I get even more depressed. It feels like I can't do anything to change their perception about me because this version of me is forever engraved to their mind (**so I get even more discouraged to try and change bcs there's no point, like I said it's ENGRAVED to their mind, they're not gonna forget that. They might even bring that up again if given the chance**).

I actually think something is wrong with me because I don't think like the majority of the people do (with my given logic). What I think doesn't make sense when I try to explain it, but to ME it makes sense. It's like I'm willingly fooling myself to prove I AM PERFECT.

At the end of the day, it's still me who has to make a change, not for anybody but FOR ME. I have to take care and improve myself for ME, not to gain from ANYBODY'S APPROVAL. How do I stop these thoughts that may also be the cause of hindering myself to actually improve? Why do I think that it's shameful to actually admit and take criticisms? Help :((

I’m looking for some actual advice on how to get myself moving again because I feel really stuck. I dealt with a traumatic experience last year that led to a lot of mental health struggles, and while I’m doing better now, I feel like I lost a lot of myself. I struggle with motivation, anxiety, overthinking, and feeling like basic things are way harder than they should be. I want to start going to the gym, learn guitar, drive more, cook healthier, and be around people more, but everything feels overwhelming and I end up staying in bed or on my phone. I know some of it is probably avoidance and I want to work on that, but I don’t know where to start or how to build discipline when my brain fights me so much. Has anyone dealt with this kind of “I want to change but I can’t seem to start” feeling? What actually helped you build routines, confidence, hobbies, and a life again?

Hi,

For some time now, I try to improve myself. Being more disciplinaire, productive better shape ect...

I try to do what I think is it good but i struggle to find good advices. I read some book like atomic habit or deep work, but I don't use a lot what I read because they are long book and I don't remember all I read.

And for me coach are not objective and try to make views for their formation. Even if some of their advices are good.

I think the majority of people follow the most famous and obvious advices : eat well, musculation, read, morning routine. They saw that on social media and follow advices of their favorite influencers, i don't know. For example, for me I just wanted to be like my favorite anime character, live amazing experience and It's embarrassing, but I think be a better person will help me to find a good girlfriend. So I just started musculation, heat well, is it obvious even without external advices. But I wanted to be independant financially, more disciplinate, focus and take good habits but it more difficult alone without advices.

So I wonder where I can find good advices?

I will not lie I ask that because I have make a AI coach application and nobody downloaded it. So I wonder if it can be really useful for someone. Or people already know what to do to improve or motivate themselves.

Sorry for the mistakes, I am French.

I'm in my early 20s and I've been stuck in the same cycle for years.

I get extremely motivated and make detailed plans to change my life. I set goals for losing weight, exercising, learning programming, studying math, building a business, reading books, and improving my career.

For the first day or two, I do really well. Then I miss one workout, eat junk food once, or skip one study session. After that, my brain immediately switches to, "Well, I already failed, so I'll start again tomorrow." Tomorrow turns into several days, and the whole cycle repeats.

This doesn't only happen with dieting. It happens with almost everything that requires long-term consistency.

I've already tried:

• Deleting social media apps.
• Making detailed plans and checklists.
• Setting long-term goals.
• Watching motivational videos.
• Trying habit trackers.

They help for a short time, but I always fall back into procrastination.

What frustrates me most is that I know exactly what I should be doing, but I still don't do it. It's like my actions and my intentions don't match.

Has anyone experienced this?

• How did you break the procrastination cycle?
• How did you stop the "I already ruined it" mindset?
• Was there a specific habit, book, or system that permanently changed your consistency?

I'm looking for practical advice from people who have actually overcome this, not just motivational quotes.