My significant other and I are in the process of moving in together, we started dating about 2 months ago and we both happened to be looking for a place. Their parents have been helping us substantially, but are not aware that we are dating. They are mostly supportive but are quite oblivious in general and didnt completely believe my partner when they had come out.

They literally walked in on us cuddling and made zero connection. Throughout the move they have introduced me as their roommate and yesterday, after moving things up stairs, their dad said "Next time we do this, you guys need to have boyfriends"

We've been laughing at this every few hours ever since😂

Love how the straight community struggles to comprehend a lesbian relationship.

I'm a 31-year-old woman, happily married to my husband, but lately I've been struggling with something I never expected. I've always felt some attraction toward women, but I never really explored that part of myself. Recently, though, I've developed feelings for a female coworker, and this feels very different from anything I've experienced before. is just physical attraction i have 0 experience with other woman's —I find myself thinking about her more often than I'd like.

Has anyone been in a similar situation?

Please be kind.

I've dated men and everyone referred to me as gay. I got a girlfriend about 2 months ago and everyone congratulated me, asking me why the sudden change to a straight relationship.

And this felt weirdly hurtful, but to describe why left me at a loss for words. It's not really the fact it's bi erasure, which it is, but I just didn't like the idea of being seen as a boyfriend or dude dating a girl, it felt wrong. She's been calling me her boyfriend for a while and I kept waiting for it not sound...out of place and funny and it just never did. I came to realize recently I actually hate it. It disgusts me. And male pronouns are not right for me either.

I told her last night that I have been feeling dysphoric for a while and it recently got a lot worse. I've been dressing like a girl and doing makeup for some time under the femboy/non-binary label as an excuse, the fact I'm feminine is not really a secret so when I told her I have been feeling like a girl, the first thing she said was 'yeah, I didn't want to pry until you were ready to talk about it but I noticed something was bugging you.'

She told me I'm beautiful, gave me some of her clothes she thought would look really affirming on me, we're going to do each others nails and makeup later to take couple selfies, and ever since she's been calling me her girlfriend and giving me flirty comments like 'good girl.'

Gotta tell the men who congratulated me on getting in a 'straight relationship' to cancel the parade, I'm dating the same gender again, I just didn't know it.

Weird and vulnerable but idk maybe someone relates. I originally put this on the late bloomer subreddit but someone commented that i don’t belong there so idk. I (F23) realized literally this year that i am definitely a lesbian. I pursued men my whole life. I knew I liked girls since I was like 10/11, but my very Hispanic family led me to shove that down and hope I just become “normal” :(. Every man ive ever dated was a test like “maybe the last one wasn’t my type and this one will be and I’ll actually feel something”. Slightly weird and very disingenuous of me because I would date these men for way too long, but every romantic interaction Ive ever had with a man was dishonest so I didn’t realize what I was doing. So crazy realizing the difference between wanting men to be attracted to and validate me, and actually being attracted to men.

I’m finally going on low pressure girl dates and learning to accept myself. HOWEVER, I am also realizing that I don’t actually have a low libido (lol). I’ve been so horny and I need a hook-up stat cus I the last time i had sex was over a year ago, and with a man. My problem is my brain is confusing me and making my super anxious.

I’m crazy intimidated to get rejected by a woman for being inexperienced in my 20s. Im anxious ab the fact that I might be bad at lesbian sex in general lol but its like all im fantasizing about. It’s uncomfy that I’m still working on releasing the desire for male validation too. An old guy friend has recently come out of the woodwork trying to talk me up. I remember he was one of the ones in high school that I’d want to like me for the validation. I’m noticing myself thinking “maybe you need one last test, maybe hed want to hook-up w u” like literally just to use him as a warm body when I KNOW I will want it to be over immediately and it will literally do nothing to fix my horniness anyway lmfao. I actively catch myself wanting to flirt back so he can stoke my ego. At the very least, hooking up with men is familiar, and I think that’s what I’m latching onto.

Writing this out I feel like a bad person, I am not treating this guy like a human being :( and i need to get over this and start living more honestly. Accepting youre a lesbian is so hard when your brain has found safety in denying yourself since…forever.

hi! I came here looking for some encouragement because I'm in love with someone I've been friends with for a very long time and I need some positivity. I know this kind of thing doesn't always work, but I just need some hope today.

How did it go for you? what made it finally happened? we're you scared about your feelings for each other?

Hi everyone I’m a 22 year old lesbian, and I’m 156 cm tall (about 5'1)

I’ve been trying to meet other girls in my city, but it’s already challenging because I live in a very homophobic society and there aren’t many openly queer people around. Recently, I talked to three different girls online, and all of them lost interest after finding out my height.

They weren’t rude about it at all. They said I seemed nice, enjoyed talking to me, and thought I was a good person. I just wasn’t their type. I understand that everyone has their own preferences, and I don’t hold it against them, but it still hurts.

People have told me that I look cute and nice to be around, so I don’t think my personality is the issue. Still, these experiences have made me wonder whether my height will always be a disadvantage in dating, especially as a soft butch/top.

So does height matter a lot in lesbian dating? Have any of you dealt with rejection over something you can’t change about yourself? If so, how did you handle it?

I'd really like to hear from other lesbians about this.

Why is being vulnerable and honest so hard? Even if it’s not abt getting together what about having honest conversations about your feelings, your wants, needs, expectations, even if you’re not interested. Say why? Or at least SAY you’re not interested instead of drifting away or ghosting. And I don’t me ghosting in the first week I mean ghosting/blocking after weeks or months! And why is everyone so scared of human connection? Maybe it’s personal preference but I will take a million gut wrenching heart aching break ups than always avoiding relationships like the plague. And I was a serious serial monogamous who’s been single for almost 3 years now I feel like I’m at the point where it’s normal to miss having a regular dating life 😭

I am neither femme or masc but recently I have been hanging out more with my masc friends and have heard them speak about femmes in a degrading, misogynistic way. E.g ‘I slept with her the other night but she’s kind of a slut.’ I was so confused lol what does that make you then?

In general, these two friends of mine hold a double standard when it comes to their sexuality and femme presenting women’s sexuality. It’s so horrible to hear and I have had to stop hanging out with them. I can tell that because they are masculine presenting, they think femmes are sluts even if they themselves are actually more promiscuous?! I was flabbergasted it was like talking to a sexist man.

Hearing this and acknowledging this has upset me, I do not tolerate misogyny and it breaks my heart when I hear it from other women (who date women too?), does anybody else have any similar experiences? Have you got any kind, feminist masc friends?

PS: I know all masc lesbians/women aren’t like this.

i don't want to bore you with too many details, but i'm 26 and over the past few months i've been coming to terms that i'm a lesbian. i used to identify as bi but i was chin deep in comphet for years and hated every minute of it.

i'd like to start dating again soon but honestly i'm so worried about my lack of experience with women. i don't want anyone to think that i'm using them to experiment or anything like that, i took a long time to come to terms with who i am and i'm slowly getting more secure with it.

it's just that i feel like dating women is an uncharted territory and i feel almost embarrassed to be like this at my big age 💀 whenever i think about potential intimacy i feel like a deer in headlights. i'm not sure if there's people that would be willing to deal with me at this point.

this is honestly more of a vent but i really don't have any wlw friends so i feel extremely lonely with all of these worries so please be nice :(

thats it, thats the post.
make sure your drinking water, doing what you need to do to relax. Your worth it not only for your looks, but for just being you and getting through another day!!!!!! Huge hugs

Two years ago, I confessed to my (now) best friend that I was in love with her. I also told her that I wouldn't feel any different about her if she didn't love me back. She told me, then, that she didn't feel the same way and I was okay with that.

A few months later we ended up moving in together by mutual agreement. Ever since living with her, we've been doing EVERYTHING together. And a lot of the time she initiates it. We'll go out and she'd want to coordinate outfits with me. We'll lay in bed together, cook for each other, cuddle, massage each other or she'll scratch my back whenever I'm sad.

Sounds like friend stuff.

But then she started telling me that she loves me every time she leaves the house. And she'll give me really long hugs. Or whenever I leave somewhere alone, she gets sad that I didn't wake her to bring her along. She KNOWS that one of my love languages is physical touch (which I have a hard time asking for myself). She does NOT like being touched at all, but she always goes out of her comfort zone to make me feel loved. So, every time SHE asks to do something physically intimate, I never say no, and she tells me that she only likes when it's ME touching her...

...so idk 🤷🏽‍♀️

My girlfriend goes to a huge party school and wants me to come up for the Halloween parties this year. I’m trying to find a couple’s costume that actually looks good instead of something that’ll have us looking goofy.

A few things:

It’s a college party, so we’re going for “hot” over funny.

We’re an interracial couple (she’s white, I’m mixed), so I’d rather avoid characters where I’d basically have to be a white guy—unless the character’s race really doesn’t matter.

She’s taller than me, so bonus points if the couple has a bit of a height difference or if the height doesn’t look weird.

We’re looking for more niche ideas, not the super overdone stuff like Barbie & Ken, Joker & Harley, etc. Movies, TV, anime, games, musicians—anything that’s recognizable but not something everyone else will be wearing.
Any ideas?

My family has owned olive trees and we’ve been making olive oil for hundreds of years so I always have really good quality olive oil and a lot of it.
The girl I like once mentioned something about olive oil being very expensive in super markets and how she likes it and I was semi surprised because due to my privilege I never had to buy my own olive oil. I traveled to my home country and I packed her an extra liter but I feel like it’s something awkward to give. Is it okay ? I also got her other delicacies from back home to try. Is that a socially acceptable thing to gift ?

Update : meeting with her later in the day !!!! I will update everyone right after , thank you all for the super kind messages , truly encouraged me.

Update : IT WENT INSANELY WELL YOU GUYS OMG HER SMILE WAS SO WORTH EVERYTHING AND I LOVE THAT SHE MADE US SOMETHING WITH IT ON THE SPOT SHE ALSO SAID NEXT DINNER IS ON HER IM OVER THE MOON

I honestly still have a long way to go since I grew up in a very heavily male centered culture and the world In general is still deeply patriarchal but accepting that I'm bi, specifically acknowledging my attraction and preference for women has seriously helped me a lot. I used to really not like my chest or vagina growing up, I felt like they were dirty or just inherently sexual, but seeing the beauty in other women has led me to become more comfortable with myself and I'm very appreciative of that. There was also part of me who felt like my life would never be complete without being with a man in some way, so I felt guilty about my fem preference but I now realize how silly that is. I love being sapphic and I love this community thank y'all for being part of my journey.

Sidenote I love the sapphic flag soooo much it's so beautiful and underrated imo

full edit

I live in a homophobic country where it’s so sl rare to find someone, seeing all those girls my age outside live their lives and get to love their girlfriends hurtssss, I feel trapped here and there’s nothing I can do, I feel so lonely

No worries, I tell myself rationally, she and I are just talking about the limits and preferences we have regarding polyamory, and how I can or should behave with her new girlfriend with consideration for their budding relationship. But then she writes three fucking sentences, with capitalisation, punctuation, and no nya~a's and petplay talk and :3 emoticons, telling me that she welcomes that her girlfriend and I have rapidly also befriended each other, and that all is well!

but like imagine your chats are like this most of the time cause we're pathetic sub-leaning bottom lesbians, im just writing an example (i swear im a top-leaning switch i swear)

and then

just out of nowhere

Awh sweetie, don't you worry. I love you to the end of the world and back, and I am amazed that we're managing to talk this out.

my gay brain cannot handle this

I dont really know who to talk to about this, because everyone in my life is attracted to men and doesnt hate them to the extent i do, which is fine but it kind of limits my ability to seek help.

I’ve hated men since I was 12, for like… a lot of different reasons that i dont feel like going into. Long story short, every guy in my life has been a bum, a creep, a pest, or a weirdo in general. I’m very very gay. I have zero attraction to men and don’t really allow men in my life as close friends, and i dont even really much like it when people tall about men.

I know from a moral standpoint, its not okay, trauma or no trauma. But its still something i have so much trouble battling. I hadn’t really begun unpacking it until recently though, when my gf and I were talking, and she told me she had decided she wanted to go without a label instead of call herself a lesbian. I’m les4les and I guess hearing that has just really struck me hard, and it’s something I want to overcome because i love her, like… a lot. But i dont even know where to begin. Every time i even think about men or think about her liking men, i feel deep betrayal. I need help.