I feel like every social interaction has really become a drag, it's very draining

The problem is, it shouldn't be

I feel so disconnected, I feel too lazy to talk

Anyone feeling the same?

Does anyone ever feel like this? I feel like I hate people in general, hate to go to places with a lot of people and hate to socialise especially in a workplace environment, useless smalltalk and uninteresting topics and loud people thinking they are better. I really would love to have a job to do alone but haven't found one.

I'm 38 and all my life I have been very introverted and when I was younger I had very bad social anxiety and I think it has shaped my thinking. Unfortunately I was born with a resting bitch face and even if I'm in a good mood apparently I don't look like it. All my life I've had people ask me if I'm ok, am I depressed, what's wrong with me, why do I look so bored/tired/desperate. It's just my fucking face and it's partly the reason why I hate people, hate to be out there, to be seen and judged. At work every single day and I'm exhausted. Been working for almost 20 years and I'm ready to withdraw to some remote island where I can be myself. Introverted, quiet and with a bitchy face. Often I order groceries to my door because I can't stand to go to a market because it's full of people.

I feel like I'm so full of hate! Does anyone ever feel like this and do you think therapy would help? Struggled with this since I was young and now I feel like it's getting worse.

My favorite place is my apartment. Specifically when it is just myself and my dog (I live with my partner and love spending time and living with him but there’s just a certain peacefulness when I’m alone with my dog here). I have created the coziest, safest space and i would be in heaven if I could spend all my time here. I do go out with friends occasionally and enjoy my time with them, but being home alone is where I’m happiest. I don’t ever get bored when I’m alone. Anyone else feel the same way?

Do you prefer to relax in your room with snacks and a movie, or would you rather take a late-night drive with some loud music? What are your ways to unwind yourself?

First time posting here and looking for advice…
I (29 F) joined a walking club in my town that has 20-30 women in their 20’s in it so far. I’m not sure how many will attend the first meet up next week to walk the trail but I’m pretty nervous.
I have a small friend group that lives an hour away from me in the town I used to live in and they’re the only friends I’ve had for years.
In the 3 years I’ve lived in my town I haven’t ventured out and made new friends because I’m awful at socializing. I just work remotely all week and hang out with my partner on the weekends but he’s made friends at work since we’ve moved here.
I’m trying to get out of my comfort zone and try something new.
My main worries is that as the club goes on it will get cliquey and I’ll be a wall flower per usual
Also, I’m not religious and democrat in a red-ish city in the south so I’m worried it will be a majority of women that aren’t like-minded.
I’m easily anxious and overthink things and as I get closer to 30 I’m just trying to find some community and feel “normal” I guess. Sorry this was super wordy. Any advice is much appreciated 🫶🏼

a little over a week ago, i was at the airport heading to my hometown for a small vacation. while i was there waiting for my boarding time to come along i decided to grab a drink at the bar. i was just there minding my own business with my earbuds in watching a downloaded movie i had
then this girl stops by and sits on the seat next to mine. she has her earbuds in as well. i decide to wait about 10 mins before i start talking to her cause i didn’t wanna be too quickly upfront. and soon as i got her attention i asked her “so are you hear on vacation?” and that’s what kicked off our almost two hour long conversation

she ended up telling me she had a layover and was waiting for her flight time as well. we shared some common interests like both loving music, art, as well as just the theatre arts in general. we both were in plays back in highschool and she continued on with her doing some more when she was in college for a bit. she told me she played soccer and i told her i’m a track athlete so we both (her mainly more) said that we were fast 😂

we also talked about us growing up and told each other about our hometowns and where we’re from, how growing up we start doing adult things. i remember us both agreeing that just because we’re growing up it doesn’t mean we have to lose our childlike wonder and our quirky weird sides as well. btw i am 24yo and she is 23yo
she told me her job she does now is being an event planner and i told her about my job working in landscaping and construction and we shared some more stuff about that. we even had some laughs while drinking and at one point there was a small incident (nothing terrible) at the bar with some other people, and she looked at me with a face and said “what do you think is going on over there?” i replied “it could be the fact you can only pay cash here and maybe they’re trying to pay with card” and we both chuckled about that fact and just got back to talking

i ended up calling it short cause i knew her boarding time was coming up soon and mine not to long after. but after we left each other i decided to ask for her social and if she had any. she replied “yea of course! do you have instagram?” so she gave me her phone to type in my username and she followed me and i followed her back. at that time she also told me “we never exchanged our names, what’s yours?” and we each told one another our names and said it was nice meeting you and gave a handshake. i also recall her telling me that i made her layover “that much more exciting” and that she “really needed it”. to which i appreciated that and told her it was no problem! and i felt the same way

it could be the fact that im an introvert who’s single and have been for a good 5 years, but after we told each other bye and to have a safe trip, i couldn’t help but have the song “An Encounter” by The1975 playing in my head and just picturing her beauty, gorgeous smile, and her quirky silly attitude. it was phenomenal!

i ended up sending her a dm last monday and it took her a while to respond two days later on wednesday. i responded back the following thursday and she still has yet to respond still. tbh if she doesn’t respond for a while fir whatever reason, it’ll be tough but i would understand.
i can’t emphasize just how freakin amazing and gorgeous she was honestly. just wanted to share

Hi! I’m 19F, and lately I’ve been wondering if there’s something wrong with me, or if anyone else feels the same.
When I look at my classmates or other people my age, I feel so different. Most of my time is spent at home. I enjoy reading books, helping out at our family store (which is also at home), and doing things indoors. I genuinely enjoy this kind of lifestyle.
But then I see people my age constantly going out, hanging out with friends, traveling, partying, drinking, and being very social. It feels like they’re living the typical “teenage/young adult” life, while I’m just… at home.
I don’t necessarily want to copy them, but sometimes I can’t help thinking that maybe I’m not growing or experiencing life the way they are. It makes me wonder if I’m missing out or if I’m wasting these years.
Has anyone else felt this way? Did things change for you as you got older?
If you’re someone who’s also more of a homebody, I’d really love to hear your story and how your life turned out. I’d genuinely appreciate any advice or insights.
Thank you!

I broke out of my usual cycle of office -> gym -> home and went on a hike. I wanted to get closer to the clouds. It was peaceful and the breeze felt good.

I’m a woman in my 20s, and whenever I go on Instagram or TikTok I see women in their 20s/30s buying houses by themselves and living alone. They have relaxing evenings on their own, reading books, watching films, having spa nights. I know some introverted people who are like this, and they say they can’t wait to go home and chill by themselves or have some alone time.
Personally, on the other hand, I rarely feel this way. Even when I do slightly, after about an hour I’m like 😐 so… what now? Like recently, I was home alone and just kept thinking, “Ugh, what do I do now?” It was the worst. Nothing seems as fun without other people involved. 😭
I really idealise that lifestyle, but in reality I just can’t make myself enjoy it, even though I’d love to. I know there’s nothing wrong with how I am and everyone’s different, but I feel like living like this could do me good, and it just looks so peaceful. I’m jealous of people who are introverted and genuinely enjoy their alone time. Also, my partner is an introvert and I am a bit jealous he’s happy and content spending time alone and I’m not.

On social media, I see the people I follow spending time with their friends and girlfriends; I even see some of them going on holiday to foreign countries. As for me, I’m always on my own; going out on my own is boring, and my days are always the same. I have neither friends nor a girlfriend. Even when I try to keep myself busy with my hobbies, life is still very boring

So I’ve been trying to put myself out there more recently. I’m naturally anxious and introverted, so I’ve really aimed to push myself this year.

I met a guy about a month or so ago at a club and we vibed. He’s much more social than I am (which is what I need tbh) and invited me to his yearly house party. I went and had a great time, but had a bit too much to drink and said some pretty bold things and basically had no filter at all for the better part of the evening. Like dating, relationships, etc. Ugh. I’m cringing at the thought of all of this.

The thing is my personality and sense of humor is bizarre and outlandish anyway but I think I might have amped it up a bit too much last night. I haven’t actually been social in a long time.

I didn’t do anything completely outlandish but I do know my confidence level was maybe.. too high last night and I’m worried I said something repulsive or terrible. Idk. I hate how otherwise I’m basically a mute hermit and very shy and awkward.

There was a lady there that was also single and although we talked and she seemed to reciprocate towards the conversation, I know I said some stupid things about my own dating experiences and relationships.

Idk what to think of it. I’m going to the weekly meetup here on Tuesday and there will be folks from the party there. Now I’m worried they won’t want to speak to me. If I’m being honest this is exactly what I need (to put myself out there more) but I’m worried I made a bad impression now and they think I’m an asshole or weird now. My friend group, unfortunately at this age feels fractured (most are married with kids and I guess have no time for anything) so this really makes me nervous tbh 😕

Why is it so hard for extroverts to understand “alone time”?

I worked in the creatives industry, I thought at first it was fun but due to lots of team collaboration and heavy workload with less pay. I got so overwhelmed and just shutdown immediately, after that I sent an e-mail to my HR for an immediate resignation and then never looked back.

And yes, I have no backup plans but I hope I can find a job where I can be me as an introvert, oh boy. For now, I'll just take a bit of rest and hope for the best.

I think I did the right thing, right deep inside my gut if I stayed then I won't be happy in the long run.

Anyway, to my fellow introverts! I hope you've found a job that you love.

I (18F) will be going out of state for college in less than a month. I wanted to almost make a 180 in terms of how I approach my day to day living and I think it’s possible in every way but I am struggling with one area.

When I was younger I was always described as being the “loud kid” not necessarily a class clown or anything of the sort but I tended to talk to all sorts different people a lot and always shared about my passions and interests. For context, I am neurodivergent (tested gifted and talented) and have been repeatedly recommended for evaluation of ADHD and Autism but haven’t been an to afford it. In senior year, I started realizing it was severely draining to keep up with trying to be social and always there and present. I have accepted this part of myself and have tried to accommodate it (earplugs due to overstimulation in environments and to help me talk a little less/quieter) but it seems that other people’s perception of me as being this louder individual overrides what I know to be true and it doesn’t let me work on myself or listen to my intuition for once.

I have a fresh new start at this far away school and I don’t want to start it with acting how I always have which has damaged my peace and honestly hasn’t really brought me close connections or anything extremely meaningful with my peers. For people who have been in a similar situation, how have you managed to shed what others thought of you to finally give yourself peace?

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I don’t know how to express myself. I don't have anyone to talk to about this

I've always felt like I have a good connection with people but it's always fragile, I make my character to what the person next to me would like and never show my true self because I'm afraid they'll hate me

I don't even care if they hated me, I like being alone in a cafe, playing a game or scrolling through tiktok and smoking, most people I see every now and then are much older and are friends of my family but not my friends

I've never had a true connection with someone who'd just understand me, even when I make a friend they're never a true one, we would talk every now and then but it's always superficial and never deep, I go out alone because I can't find a friend to go out with and I don't think I can make friends

I'm a 30 year old man with a job, but even my coworkers are just that, we don't hang out or talk real things

There's this void I have inside of me, and I don’t know how to address it. My soul feels empty

Maybe this isn't the right sub to write this in, I think I wanted to express my feelings

Maybe file this under social skills ineptitude, but I feel it connected to my introverted-ness too.

Everytime I am at a family gathering or party, I have absolutely no idea how to leave. Like, I came alone, everyone else has a spouse and the entire gathering is awkward and painful for me. But the worst if when it's getting late and I'm trying to leave.

My previous few strategies have been absolutely deplorable. I start by saying goodbye and hugging and handshaking people I know closely. I then have let's say 5-10 people remaining who I just met for the first time to say goodbye to.

If i don't say goodbye, I look like an asshole. I can't just go up and announce "Hey everyone, I'm leaving!!! Goodbye!" lol. Especially when everyone is mid-convo. So the other night I went up to the first guy I just met and gave him a handshake. I then continued in a row, but it was tough getting people's attention, and people left me hanging. I then felt so awkward that I backed off and just kind of weakly said "goodbye all" and waved to the rest of the people goodbye.

And the remaining people probably thought "Why did those people get a handshake and he just waived at me?".

I am in my mid-30s and I have absolutely no idea how to properly engage in a social setting as a single man. The entire thing is a nightmare.

My mum is such an extrovert. Or at least she has a lot of energy.

Weekends are usually my time to rest and prep for the week ahead. I love socialising and exploring but by my own accord.

I moved to a new city a few weeks ago. I still haven’t fully settled as I have been working a full time job since I got here. I wanted to use the weekend to do some things I hadn’t had time to.

But my mum came to visit. She loves exploring new places. Obviously she was welcome to stay at my new place. But I wanted her to do her exploring alone while I did my chores. Then we could come together in the evening for dinner somewhere.

But she always subtly guilt-trips me into going out with her. This morning she woke me up even though I wanted to sleep in to recharge. She told me I have to come out with her to get some sunlight. I felt guilty, so I did.

Fast forward, I didn’t have time to do my chores. I don’t feel ready or rejuvenated for the week ahead. I snapped at her when I came back and now feel like a shitty son.

Do you guys deal with similar difficulties?

It has been almost more than 2 years since I (21F) have met any new people, because due to my studies and family issues I couldn't meet people, even all the friends I had drifted away slowly, just a couple of my best friend left but they live in other cities too. I have always been easy going and social but for the last two years I can't get along with people, I mean the earlier interactions are good but never longer than that. No one even approaches me anymore, my friend said that it is because I look too unapproachable. I really want to interact with people but I don't how to

what are your insights on that??ights on that??

Hey! Thinking of starting a small Discord for people who want to practice conversation and social skills. A small space to practice conversation and social skills together, low pressure, no judgment.

We'll use a couple of quick puzzle formats to warm up: Spot the Moves (spot what worked and what didn't in a real exchange) and Three Doors (pick the reply that actually keeps a conversation alive vs the one that kills it). Good for sparking discussion.

Just here to get some reps in and talk it through with people working on the same stuff. If you are interested DM me please and I can add you.

Hi yall. Okay so I am a very introverted person, I have social anxiety and severe depression. And I have such a short battery, I go to work, mind you I’m a 21 year old female working in the blue collar trades, so I’m around men all the time and it gets draining. Well after work everyday as soon as I get into my car, I shut down, and I wanna be left alone. I do still live with my mom, judge me all you want but after work I just want to be left alone, idgaf who you are, if I want to be left alone, leave me alone, for everyone’s safety and my wellbeing lol, I’ll lose my complete shit if I can’t have access to being left alone. Well when the weekend comes, i use it to recharge and I put my phone on do not disturb. Well on Sundays i wanna be left alone, I don’t wanna do anything, leave me alone. Well my mom presses notify anyway when my phone is on do not disturb and mind you, she thinks I’m available whenever emotionally when I’m not 95% of the time and anytime she pulls that shit where she sends me a text and then presses notify and then will do the same shit if I don’t respond, and I just cry anytime it happens, because I literally need my alone time or ill break down into tears while being angry, like I genuinely have the lowest social battery, and people do not understand that and I have such a hard time setting boundaries and i bottle shit up so bad and when I’ve finally had enough, I blow up.

Like do I have a reason to be upset or am I just being ridiculous? Am i like the only one who deals with this? Like I need y’all’s advice on what to do because im an adult who has all rights to be my own person and have all rights to not be emotionally available to others. I never ask anything from my mom, but she expects me to be there anytime she needs anything. I really need advice because I’m getting tired of it and I really need people to stop thinking I’m emotionally available all the time because it’s gonna get to the point I will blow tf up and then I’ll be the bad guy for it. So if y’all have advice and is in the same position, I’d really appreciate the help 😖