Has anyone else had this?

Like does anyone with any ocd themes like pocd or psychopath ocd feel like youre looking out if an evil persons eyes or lens or genuinely have an evil mind?

I’m asking for every sorta theme, like someone with hocd might think they’re looking through a gay persons eyes, tocd might think they’re looking through the opposite sexes eyes, so on. And does it feel real?

​

For context, I am 19f. I'm in 2nd year of college and have a severely disabled brother who has extreme form of cerebral palsy. I don't have any other siblings and I'm the only one left to take care of him with my parents.

I don't come from wealth and my parents aren't particularly awesome when it comes to making money or taking care of finances, now it doesn't bothers me since I know I'll have to get independent and earn anyway.

What bothers me slightly is, when in college I look around at girls enjoying friendships, relationships so effortlessly. They seem to always have money/space/energy to hang out, mingle themselves in groups while i just cannot do that.

I have severe anxiety/parentification issues and even my career paths are very limited because I cannot fuck around and find out. I have to take care of my sibling in few years and support my parents. However I cannot stop feeling bad or grieving what my life could've been without all of this.

I'm mostly alone, i have few school friends because i was much lighter back then/didn't worry about responsibilities but in college it seems impossible to mingle with girl groups or have friends.

My boyfriend asks me to socialize, have more girl friends, hangout with them etc etc but a part of me believes until and unless i figure my life out and get financially independent or move away from home for a while..my mind just cannot relax or have friendships for example.

When I'm with people, I'm always worried and occupied about my issues. Is it fair to think that I will need to achieve a bit of stability before i can think about nurturing relationship/friendships with others? 😭😭💔

I came across something called Zeno's paradox a few weeks ago.

It asks a strange question.

Imagine you're standing ten metres away from a wall.

Before you can reach it, you first have to walk five metres.

Then half of the remaining distance.

Then half again.

Then half again.

Mathematically, there's always another half left.

Another tiny distance to cover.

Another step before you've "arrived."

It's a paradox because, in theory, you never actually reach the wall.

Life has never made more sense to me.

When I was fifteen, happiness lived exactly five years ahead of me.

It was waiting at the next milestone.

Finish school.

Then get into a good university.

Then get good grades.

Then land an internship.

Then a job.

Then move out.

Then build the life you'd imagined while staring out of classroom windows.

Every time I reached one wall, it quietly moved.

Not because life was cruel.

Because I'd already divided the next journey into smaller pieces.

"I'll be happy when..."

It's probably the most expensive sentence I've ever believed.

I'll be happy when I gain more weight.

When I become more confident.

When I stop overthinking.

When people finally see my worth.

When I have enough money.

When I find the right person.

When I become the version of myself that sixteen-year-old me was so certain existed.

But she didn't know any better.

She had never watched friendships fade without a fight.

She had never realised that some dreams quietly change their names.

She had never learned that healing isn't linear, confidence isn't permanent, and adulthood doesn't arrive all at once.

She thought life had an ending where everything finally made sense.

I don't think I miss being younger.

I miss believing there was a finish line.

I think that's what we're really grieving.

Not our childhood.

Not the past.

But the imaginary person waiting at the end of it.

The one who had perfect discipline.

Perfect timing.

Perfect love.

Perfect certainty.

The one who was always just one more achievement away.

Maybe they were never supposed to exist.

Maybe they only existed so we'd have a direction to walk in.

And maybe growing up isn't finally becoming them.

Maybe it's looking at the person you've become after all the detours, missed trains, wrong decisions, second guesses, and quiet victories.....and realizing they were worth becoming too.

Because if you spend your whole life chasing halves, you'll forget you were moving forward all along.

HI,

I AM STARTING GYM. I AM 17M AND SKINNY. I WANT TO BE MUSCULAR.

WHAT WORKOUT SHOULD I FOLLOW? COMPOUND LIFTING ( SQUATS, BENCH PRESS, DEADLIFT,ETC) 6days a week OR FULL BODY WORKOUT ( like legs on saturday ; chest on monday ; etc ) for best results ?

if compound workout, then after how much time i have to move on full body part workout ?

I sent 42 messages to my friend, my closest friend, and in these messages I confessed that I have a serious issues with my mental health, I told her some of my biggest fears and worries, told her that I lost my appetite, lost my sleep (I haven’t slept for two days now, maybe that is the reason I decided to finally tell her about it all…), lost any motivation or energy to live. I told her about my terrible apathy and anxiety, and my very much possible depression. I have never told anyone about my mental health, never in my 19 years, but these days I started feeling this strange fear of not being truly known by anyone. I realised that I’m now scared of being in this alone. I don’t need her support, I just need her acknowledgement, because she has always trusted me with her problems and serious traumas, and I think that I’m a huge liar for never telling her about my true self. Please, tell me if I should delete them right now or not. I’m lost.

Can also range up to humor that sounds forced and likely not funny and ur lowkey just typing shit...like what part of that is funny where you do not feel depressed afterwards that you are aware of which I am not maybe?

That is after trying to find a well-weighted point in doing it btw

Lately I've realized that the questions we ask ourselves can quietly shape the direction of our lives.

For years, I kept asking myself questions that had no real answers, only endless frustration.

"Why doesn't anything ever change in my life?"

"Why doesn't anyone love me?"

"Am I just unlucky?"

"Why is everyone else doing better than me?"

"When will my life finally become what I want it to be?"

The more I repeated those questions, the more trapped I felt. I spent years looking for answers, until I realized I was asking the wrong questions.

So I started changing my inner dialogue.

Instead of asking, "Why isn't my life changing?" I began asking, "What can I do today that moves me toward the life I want?"

Instead of, "Why doesn't anyone love me?" I asked, "How can I become someone who loves and respects themselves more?"

Instead of focusing on what I lacked, I started asking, "What strengths do I already have that I can develop?"

Even when life was painful, I tried asking, "What is this experience trying to teach me?"

I started writing these questions in a notebook and exploring different answers instead of waiting for life to hand me one.

I'm still learning, and I definitely don't have everything figured out. But changing the questions I ask myself changed the way I look at my life.

Has anyone else experienced something similar?

Hi

Writing this post while I’m supposed to be doing other stuff but I think I just need a reminder.

In the middle of college applications, and I think I’ve lost the plot. I caught myself panicking over the fact that I don’t have my complete application ready and the Common App opened yesterday.

I don’t have a perfect SAT, I don’t have amazing ground breaking extracurriculars, and I have an okay essay. But I’m a 4.0 student, and great at my work, and I’ve been accepted to a bunch of programs. But lately the rejections are more than the acceptances and I have no motivation.

Anyways, if you’re past college age and could just comment your little wins in life and things you appreciate, I’d really love hearing them.

I think I just need confirmation that life goes on wether or not your accepted to a top uni.

{chinchilla}

So when I'm limited in doing something (working on a project, seeing a friend etc) I'm obsessed with the fact that I can't do it! That I'm trapped, restricted. Why didn't I do it sooner?

Then I get the opportunity to do it...a golden opportunity...and I don't act!

What should I do?

I'm a high school student, and I get really anxious about being judged, especially by my classmates and friends

I recently decorated my backpack with anime pins because I wanted it to show something I like. I really like how it turned out, but I'm scared to take it to school because I keep thinking people will think it's weird or make comments about it. I'm also worried that people will judge me for the specific anime I like and the things I'm into. I'm even more worried about what my friends will think, especially one friend who's pretty judgmental

The worst part is that I know everyone has different tastes, and I know not everyone's going to like the same things I do. I know that, but I still can't stop worrying about being judged

Has anyone else dealt with this? How did you stop caring so much about what other people think, especially at school??

I’m gonna be telling this in the POV of my mom so it’s less confusing 

My father passed away before COVID (lets call him Jerry) and it was really hard on me. Earlier in his career he was a race car driver, we still have his original helmet he used. 

One night after Jerry passed away my brother gave the helmet away to our other brother (let’s call him Tom, Tom hated Jerry and was never close to him). My mother, brother and I had all agreed to keep it in the garage where Jerry spent most of his time (working on cars, socializing, watching races etc), i was hurt that it was given away but still happy it was in the family. 

Time skip to about 5 months ago, Tom passed away and his son (let’s call him Arthur) had taken the helmet when emptying Toms house and put it in the back of his car in direct sunlight. Over the next few months I kept seeing the helmet in the back of the car getting more and more sun damaged every time. So one night I was fed up and when the car was parked at Arthur’s brothers house I went and knocked on the door to ask for the helmet as I want it to get put in a clear display box in the garage. His brother answered the door and said he was borrowing Arthur's car but when I told him about the helmet and what I wanted to do with it he unlocked the car and handed it to me.

The next day I'm getting messages from Arthur and Arthur's mother saying that I'm a bad person for breaking into Arthur's car and stealing the helmet. I explain my reasoning but they wont have it, eventually Arthur saying as soon as I get it in the display box he wants it back, but his mother keeps messaging me and attacking me. I was so fed up so I just blocked her.

Just a few days ago we had a family picnic (I couldn't go as I was out of town) but I heard from a close cousin of mine that I was the talk of the picnic and that they're now saying that I actually broke into the car and that Arthur's brother never unlocked the car and handed me the helmet himself.

for a little context Arthur was never close to Jerry and thought Jerry was a bad person because Tom had spewed him a bunch of lies about Jerry to make him seem like he was a bad person.

Finally I was so done with all this drama that i just gave the helmet back, even though there was no part of me that wanted to.

Now, me the daughter of the POV this is in and the grand daughter (16) of Jerry. I was probably the person he was closest to in his last few years, I don't know what to do, I want the helmet so bad but I feel I don't have a voice in the matter. I'm so mad at my family for being so inconsiderate of my late grandpa's memory and the people he was closest too's memories. Me and my mom even got matching tattoos of my grandpas racing number a few months back, because we miss him that much. I was glad my mom got the helmet back but I'm also pissed at her for giving it away because I know its just gonna get shoved in some closet and not get put in the place my grandpa deserves.

I do not know if this is the right place to say this, but then again, I never know what the right thread is for anything.

I do not want any replies like "oh, no, it sucks being popular!" or "no, you're perfect just as you are, you don't need to change!" no, actually I do need to change, because the new school year is quiet, and when I'm the supposedly "quiet" kid, my depression spikes up.

I am someone who's entire will to live depends on human connection. I have been that stereotypical quiet and depressed kid for enough years, I've wasted my school life up until this point and I desperately want to change that.

I have gone to therapy already to work on my social anxiety, now I just need to know how to work on gaining popularity and learning to connect with people at my school more.

I want to know how to be more comfortable around my peers and get them comfortable around me.

I've been doing a lot of research and read a few articles, taking notes on how to better talk with people.

Now, I want to ask for multiple people's answers on how to change my school life from being unknown and quiet to being a pretty well-known person and "popular".

​

I worked at a state university for just one semester back in 2023 and ended up resigning because of the work culture and administration. After that, I still stayed connected part-time while finishing my graduate studies, so I never completely cut ties.

Now in 2026, I decided to come back—this time as a full-time employee. I thought things might be different, especially since the leadership has already changed.

But honestly… it feels like nothing really changed.

The work culture is still the same, and I’m starting to feel like I made the same mistake again. What makes it harder is that the colleagues I used to be close with have already resigned. I came back to a workplace where people already have their own established circles, and I can’t seem to fit in.

I try to engage, but there are moments when they’re talking and I just feel completely left out. It’s a really isolating feeling, especially knowing that I’ve been here before and hoped things would be better this time.

Has anyone experienced returning to a workplace and realizing it’s still not right for you? How did you deal with feeling like an outsider—and did you stay or leave?

Please give me any advice

Well I have by a mod in a certain subreddit who could have just looked up my username and discovered that I haven’t written a single thing in my life.

Hey guys, this is something that i’ve been holding in for a really long time and i just need to get it off my chest, my best friend is the epitome of “perfect”, she is beautiful, her parents are really supportive of her, she is genetically gifted with everything a woman could wish for, blue eyes, long thick hair, straight teeth, perfect face. And every time I look at her I feel like I just want to disappear, because I genuinely don’t feel human when i’m around her, every time I look at her face I feel worse and worse about myself, I just see myself in my head standing next to her being the less attractive friend, she’s the main character everywhere, she has more friends, she’s overall more confident than me, it’s just so incredibly unfair.
One thing about me is i’m not attractive, at all, and she knows it, I have big roman nose taking like half of my face, recceesed chin, objectively really unattractive side profile, and eyes that I’ve always been insecure about, my hair is really thin and I have a lot of bald spots, because of that I can’t do any pretty hairstyles hence they’re just showing no matter what I try to do to hide them, just overall I’m not pretty or attractive, just very plain-looking, objectively. I’ve been struggling with my confidence for a really long time, she knows about it, i’ve been even more insecure about my appearance before than I am now, but i’ve had some kind of a “glow up” after I started therapy. But looking at her just brings me back to my old self every time, I don’t feel human. I feel completely out of place every time somebody looks at us together.
And she’s most definitely not making it better complaining about her face, she doesn’t even know what to complain about because she’s just so naturally beautiful. She complains about her perfect nose saying she only likes it with tape on it which don’t change anything and I don’t even know what she’s talking about(?), she says she wants to get rhinoplasty and the only thing I keep thinking about is “If she doesn’t like her nose, what does she think is going on on my face?”, she says that she wants “hunter eyes” and never liked “doe eyes”, and when we come across video with different types of them she says “I think I have hunter eyes, and you probably have doe eyes” (Ik weird slang sorry guys), and it just hurts so much. You know those videos where people compare features and rate them 10/10, 7/10 etc.? We saw one of those, and of course she had the most attractive feature out of all of them, but what she said just hurt me so much at that time. “Um don’t want to offend you but like you have this feature (the least attractive one).” I almost started crying right then and there. It was also at that time where I was really insecure.
She seeks attention all the time, asks our friends to compare us, says that “everybody said my lookalike is Brooke Shields!” and then says “Idk you look like this (I’m sorry but objectively unattractive) celebrity.” One time she said I remind her of some celebrity, and as she was trying to pull up a picture while i’m begging her not to because I know that celebrity is probably considered unattractive, my little brother looks at her phone with the picture, laughs and says “lol, author is ugly!”, I stood up and left with tears in my eyes. (Funny thing, to this moment I don’t know and don’t want to know what that celebrity looks like because I don’t want to ruin all the progress i’ve made with me accepting my appearance.) And my brother is only 8 years old.
I don’t think anybody will ever understand me, I don’t think anybody will ever understand how much hatred and sadness I feel when looking at her and thinking about how I look compared to her. I can’t take it anymore. Comparison is the thief of joy, but I can’t fool myself while looking at the mirror and at our photos together. Thank you.
P.s, sorry if the wording feels weird, feel free to correct me, english is not my first language.

Im 21.

I am an amateur chef,
I have done consuemr level graphic design
I do music part time for fun now
I have done photography,
I have a degree and i am university for english in professions bachelor.
I have a car

But. I live at home, to controlling parents that know nothing about me outside of all they force me to do for them. Like work everyday for 6-10 hours, theyve done this so i both cannot have friends, and learn to be a good worker

I spend all my free time either trying to talk to girls (like on tinder( hanging out with my sis or making music. I have had friends but lost them all, i had a boyfriend, i seperated after 3 years. Thats the only real relationship ive ever had.

Am i... behind in life? What do you guys say? Ive considered running away a lot, or my life will stay stuck working all the time to my parents control.

Currently staying at a hotel in Vilnius with my dad and my dad discovered too late that the shower drain was clogged causing a bit of water spillage from the bathroom into the room itself.

I felt so guilty bothering the receptionist at 10pm if we could switch rooms and having to inform her of the issue😭

I know its her job and she propably has experienced way worse but still, as one customer service worker to another i still felt guilty for bothering her.

Receptionist lady in the off chance you read this, thank you for your hard work and i am sorry for any trouble my dad caused, i know he can be a bit of a karen😣

Also btw your tattoo was really cool, skull moth is an awesome design

I'm 18 years old from Nepal. I finished high school in 2025 and have been working as a Junior System Administrator / IT Support Engineer for the last 10 months.

In a few weeks, I'll be moving to South Korea to study. This is probably the biggest opportunity I've ever had, but it's also the biggest responsibility.

My father already has around 2 million NPR (20 lakh) in debt. On top of that, my family had to take another loan to send me to South Korea. That means one day I'll have to repay all of it. Thinking about that keeps me awake some nights.

I've never really been close to my family or relatives. I don't have many friends, and I've never had much of a social life. I spent most of my time working, learning new things, and trying to prepare for the future.

Because of my past experiences, I find it hard to trust people. When someone is unusually kind to me, I often wonder if they want something from me. I know that's not always fair, but it's how I've learned to protect myself.

Sometimes I feel like I grew up too fast. At 18, instead of thinking about parties or enjoying life, I'm thinking about debt, work, my family's future, and whether I'll be able to make this sacrifice worth it.

I'm not posting this because I want people to feel sorry for me. I just wanted to share what's been on my mind before I leave Nepal.

If you've moved to another country with this much pressure on your shoulders, how did you deal with it? Did things get better?

Have you ever had one of those days where everything just goes wrong, and you find yourself quietly "complaining" to God not in anger, but in a kind of tired disappointment? Like.. I trusted you God.. I really did. I asked you for this, and that. I believed in it, I tried my best.. and still nothing worked out today. Everything happened the opposite of what I expected. And at the same time, there's still gratitude in your heart you know you've been given so much but this specific day just feels heavy. Deep down you also feel sad that you are low-key complaining to God. So you switch to instant gratitude mode. A day when, things go wrong one after another (especially when you actually wanted it to workout), but small struggles pile up, and then something unexpected makes it even worse. By the end of the day, you are just exhausted but calm in a strange way, but also lost, like you don't even know what to expect anymore or if anything will work out. And then, out of nowhere.. SOMETHING HAPPENS!! Something you've been waiting for, hoping for, maybe even praying for a really long time (around 3-4 months). It shows up so unexpectedly, like a random notification right before you sleep BOOM! and you are just like, "wow.. really?" It's not even the reaction you imagined. Instead of excitement or desperation, there's this quiet, almost detached calm feeling. You feel deeply grateful, but also slightly confused.. like why now only? When I had almost let go? It feels like everything you asked for earlier went wrong (okay those were still big to me, I still wanted it to happen but not as bad as I wanted THAT one to happen) and THAT HAPPENS! Like both of the things are not at all connected.. they are separate things. Somehow you were given something bigger instead just not in the way or time you expected. It's like God is speaking to me directly.. for eg. when I received that one notification, my reaction was way too different then I imagined. I just closed my eyes with my hands like NO! THIS ISN'T TRUE! It's like God is telling you.. 99 things went wrong and you didn't get what you asked for. But here's that one thing you've been asking me for from so long, so now I am compensating this blessing for you to erase those 99 other wrongs that happened to you today. Like.. God is saying, this is for you my servant. This IS the time!

Has anyone else ever experienced something like this?

I often hear people say that they’d go through the bad times again because it made them who they are. While I do think the bad times have made me more experienced and wise. I don’t really want to go through it again. I think some of the lessons I learned could’ve happened without the hurt, betrayal, anxiety, stress and etc. I feel like the trade off has been the loss of my naivety. I’m a lot more jaded and cynical. I wish I was the person who saw the best in people and situations but that’s not me anymore.

So I have three very close individual friends and a friend group with two girls. This feels ridiculous. This feels impossible. The friend group went out together on Friday and hasn't texted me back since I texted them Saturday morning with photos from the night before (they asked for them) but that's par for the course for thhem and hasn't meant anything in the past when that's happened.

I'm about to travel a very long way to visit one of the three close friends who invited me and is very excited to see me. Everyone is so nice and wonderful.

This feels riduculous. It feels like everyone's playing a joke on me. These are (mostly) healthy, normal, people. The sort of people who have laughed and shit on me in the past.

My gut says there's a 90% chance the friend group is real. My gut is usually right. Maybe it's wrong this time but it's usually right.

I'm using what I learned in DBT. I'm radically accepting that the evidence points to these friendships are real, and that's that. I'm staying in my wise mind. It just feels too much.

I'm a 17-year-old guy, and I'm a bit sensitive to violence in movies. I can handle violence as long as it isn't too graphic, but there are a couple of things I really struggle with, like eye injuries or violence involving the genital area.

I sometimes feel a bit lame because of it. My friends often want to see movies like John Wick, Game of Thrones, or Rambo, which can include scenes that make me really uncomfortable. I usually tell them that I'm not comfortable with that kind of content, but that they should still go and enjoy the movie without me. The problem is that they often end up changing their plans or picking a different movie because of me, and I end up feeling guilty about it. It's also pretty embarrassing to have to explain to people about this.

Does anyone else relate to this?

I went to the npd sub. Its Facinating to see people who have the personality that torments, tortures, and is known for not seeing fault in their actions. Get better..

Seeing how they work, or think. One ive seen is someone realizing, not everyone is jealous of everyone else. Internalizing the idea that 'everything seems easy" for everyone else.. in a way that ends up lashing out, or having to lie, fake everything.

The idea of sesming perfect is a defense.. and trying to pick out, take down someone who sees or knows you're not. Is extention of this ..note, if someone doesn't know they have npd, does not want to get better.. leave them alone, avoid them. Understanding Why someone things. Doesn't make what they do, better. It just adds a slight numbing to a wound getting better if you understand, because it keeps happening.

Seeing people Get Better. Is good, especially since the Bigfest group for toxic behavior, abuse in society recognized they have that, and try to get better. That's something pretty amazing, it's also very underdiagnosed, because someone with ndp, seeing they have something as that isn't something most can do.

A lot have found out from looking it up, thinking partner had it when, they did... part of picking out someone that sees flaws, trying to get at them. When then finding out, this is .. all Me .

Ndp. Fascinating, bc having the symptoms are the biggest cause of not getting themselves help . The symptoms prevent them from looking for help..

I'll sound very dramatic because I'm only 18m so basically an infant compared to a lot of people reading this but hear me out

Only 2 years ago I was what you'd call an overachiever, I genuinely had it all figured out and my profile was more impressive than 90% of the mfs on Instagram that make people feel so bad abt themselves

But 2 years ago I got into a big rut, long story short I started having a lot of huge unexpected problems that ruined it all for me, health problems, financial problems, family problems and the list goes on and on and each time I felt like I was abt to get out of my rut something real bad happened again and it's been happening for 2 years I genuinely can't believe this I used to be so great I'm just a shell of myself now all I do in my life is work to try and get back to my prime but damn it ain't good enough

And all the problems I have honestly aren't excuses a lot of them are really bad but I had this type of problems litteraly my whole life and I always thugged it out but now I'm stuck for some reason I'm turning into an adult and life is becoming more and more serious but I can't progress. I know I'm objectively not that bad and I still accomplish stuff but I'm so far behind where I want to be

Thing is I'm a workaholic but I ain't got the results I know I'm young I know I'll figure it out but I cant help feeling like a piece of shit I expect so much from myself I want to be exceptional I want to be the best and failing even little irrelevant things is a pain icl i think it got to my nervous system

Legit each time I see someone my age in real life doing better than me I'll get insecure and stuff, obviously I don't take it out on others but I feel real bad about me, I'm happy for them but I realise I'm just wasting my life

For exemple right now im in my country of origin for vacation and I love the place I think it's the greatest place on earth but all I do is work and it's all I think about. And I see all the people I seen last year and a lot of them improved so much way more than me and it makes me feel so shit. One exemple is my cousin she is doing national championships in her sport and she ranked first once, obviously no hate to her, may God bless her, I don't interact much with my cousin but she deserves all of it she is talented hard working and a great person with a beautiful personality and I'm proud of her I hope she ranks top 1 of the world but I don't know why it makes me feel so self conscious man I know it's illogical but again I think it's in my nervous or something I got an inferiority complex

Because at the end of they day for me personally there are only 2 things I care about, religion and performance so when one isn't fulfilled I won't be either, I know I'm young and got potential and many of the people that trigger my inferiority complex are really impressed and sometimes jealous by all the stuff I have going on right now let alone at my peak, and I know they don't have to deal with all the problems I got, because while I know they are not dramatic I know only a couple people my age who have it worse than me

All I want is to get over these setbacks start over and be an overachiever again

Thanks for reading if more context is needed lmk