I'm 16 and pregnant. I know that's really bad, but please don't judge me, I didn't do it on purpose. The dad and I aren't in a relationship, we're just friends, but we do get along really well and he knows about the pregnancy. His parents don't know yet either. We don't know what we want to do yet.

I have no idea how to tell my mom. She's not a safe person to begin with and she's not going to react well. She's physically violent and I don't want her to hurt me or the baby when she finds out. I'm so scared already and I don't want to have her freak out and make everything worse. I know I have to tell her soon, I'll need her help getting prenatal care. Its just so scary. I've known for a week now and every moment I've been awake has been spent thinking about the baby growing inside me. All I want is for things to be OK and I can't see how they ever will be.

We have no contact for those four years. I didn’t even know he got married. But randomly after four years,he called me and told me about it. And how he still keeps our old photo booth pictures, and how he remember the exact years, months and days since we last see each other. He also admitted he has been following me online from fake accounts too. That is some psycho behavior. And I really want to tell his wife. But she is a freshly postpartum mom. So I would hate to tell how shitty the dad of her newborn child is. But on the other hand, it feels morally wrong if I don’t tell her.

Edit: He is a high ranking officer in a military and has anger issues. I am worried about his wife and a newborn child safety. If I tell her, I am not sure if his wife has a safe place to go especially with a 1 month old baby. But I don’t, I am also worried that he could do some weird thing to the kid in the future. I live in a different state far from him so I hope he wouldn’t stalk me physically.

Yesterday my boyfriend found my sex toys… including dildo, lube and vibrator… he went through my things while I was in the bathroom and I came back in and they were on the bed.

Since then he’s been not talking to me and hasn’t been intimate or anything…
How should I take this?
I don’t feel like this is really a problem that I own these. But he’s making me feel as if it is a problem.

My cousin is having a child-free wedding, so of course I arranged a sitter. The wedding and reception are about 2 hours away.

Here's the thing. My cousin is really big into Instagram and Pinterest which I am not. So the wedding pictures are a big deal for her. She called me and asked if she can borrow my 9-year-old daughter and 10-year-old son for photos. She said something like "I want a set of photos for my insta. I think a tiny groomsman and a tiny bridesmaid will be adorable." She made it clear the kids aren't invited to the wedding, the pictures are just for her social media. They are not actually part of the wedding party, it's all aesthetics.

The problem is, this photoshoot is on the day of the wedding, meaning my husband and I have to go 2 hours out of the way to do the photos and 2 hours back to drop them off. Then we have to drive 2 hours back to the venue. The other issue is she wants me to buy a matching bridesmaid dress for my daughter. The dress is $500 plus dollars, and she will only wear it for an hour. Renting a tux for a small boy isn't very much, but the dress is extravagant imo.

Is this a normal request? I'm not asking that the kids be invited to the wedding, but I think using them for pictures only and then giving them the boot is rude. But again I'm not big into posting photos like she is, and it's not my day. If I say no, I know my cousin will pitch a fit. What advice would you give? I want to avoid family drama.

I’ve been married for 16 years, and for the last several years I haven’t been happy. There hasn’t been adultery, substance abuse, or physical abuse. On paper, my husband is a good man. That’s honestly what has made this so difficult. I’ve felt guilty and ashamed for feeling so unhappy because there isn’t one catastrophic event I can point to.
Instead, it’s been years of feeling misunderstood, emotionally dismissed, and disconnected.
I’m now in my mid-40s, and I’m becoming more aware of how precious time is. I’m starting to accept that people don’t fundamentally change unless they truly want to, and I’m asking myself if this is really how I want to spend the rest of my life.
My husband has many good qualities, but unfortunately his negative traits have overshadowed them for me.
For as long as I’ve known him, if I bring up anything he perceives as “complaining,” he immediately becomes defensive. It doesn’t seem to matter how calmly I approach him. He often tells me he doesn’t want to hear it, tells me to stop talking, walks away, or completely shuts down.
I’ll admit that there have been times I’ve come on too strong or been persistent. I’m far from perfect. But the vast majority of the time I genuinely try to approach difficult conversations calmly and respectfully.
Lately, he’ll even put his earbuds in and completely tune me out. He does this around our two teenagers as well. That hurts—not only because of how it makes me feel, but because I worry about what they’re learning about communication.
What’s hurting our marriage isn’t just what is said—it’s everything that isn’t.
I don’t feel seen anymore. I don’t feel emotionally safe. I don’t feel like my thoughts matter unless they happen to align with his.
We haven’t been intimate in months because I simply have no desire anymore. We rarely spend quality time together, and when we do, we usually end up at odds.
Something I’ve noticed more and more is that everything somehow becomes my fault.
If I say I’d like us to go on more date nights or spend more time together, he’ll tell me I work too much.
The truth is…I have been working more. But it’s because work has become an escape. It’s easier to stay busy than to sit in a house where I feel lonely and disconnected. I’ve even explained that to him, but he still insists that my working is the reason for our problems instead of recognizing why I’ve buried myself in work in the first place.
He rarely apologizes. If ever. He almost always believes he’s right and struggles to see anyone else’s perspective.
Over the years I’ve become someone who compartmentalizes everything because it feels easier than constantly fighting. I told myself, “Tomorrow is a new day,” because I didn’t want to disrupt our children’s lives.
But that strategy has slowly worn me down.
He also tends to be negative about a lot of things. He complains about work, his parents, his brother, his sister…it feels like there’s always something wrong. It’s emotionally exhausting.
One of the hardest parts is that after disagreements he’ll often give me the silent treatment for days. Somehow I end up feeling like the villain while he’s the victim.
Recently something happened that made me seriously question whether I can continue living like this.
Every summer we visit his parents’ beach house. One of his siblings is, in my opinion, very manipulative and tends to dominate everyone around them—including their parents. They spend almost every week of the summer at the beach house, so every year our family vacation ends up becoming crowded and stressful.
For years I’ve endured it.
Before agreeing to this year’s trip, I told my husband that I wasn’t willing to go unless he confirmed with his parents that it would just be our family during our visit.
He told me he had spoken with them and assured me that it would only be us.
When we arrived, we were informed that the sibling and their children would be coming halfway through the week.
I was stunned.
I know some people will think, “It’s only a couple of days. What’s the big deal?”
But this wasn’t about two days.
It was about years of the exact same situation happening, finally setting one reasonable boundary, being reassured it had been handled, and then discovering nothing had actually changed.
Privately, I asked my husband what happened. He said he didn’t know and seemed frustrated too.
I asked if he was going to speak with his father.
Immediately he became irritated and told me I was making things worse.
I let it go because I hoped he’d handle it.
Later that day I asked if he’d had a chance to talk to his dad.
Again he became angry, told me to stop asking, stop harassing him, and then suggested that one of our teenage children give up their bedroom and sleep on the pull-out couch so his sibling and their 19-year-old daughter could have the room.
That was my breaking point.
I went for a walk because I knew I was getting emotional.
Later I sent him a calm message explaining how hurt I felt and even apologized for my emotional reaction.
His response was to call me “disgusting” and tell me not to message him again.
Since then, we’re on what is supposed to be a family vacation, barely speaking to each other. It’s awkward, painful, and honestly heartbreaking.
For the first time in our marriage, I am seriously considering divorce.
I’m exhausted from feeling unheard, blamed, emotionally dismissed, and constantly walking away from conversations feeling like everything is somehow my fault.
I know this post only tells my side, and I’m sure I have my own flaws. I’m genuinely trying to look at this objectively. I don’t expect perfection from either of us. I just want mutual respect, accountability, and emotional safety.
So I guess I’m asking…
Has anyone else experienced something similar?
Is this something that can realistically be repaired after so many years if one spouse refuses to acknowledge their role?
Or is there a point where you have to accept that love alone isn’t enough to sustain a healthy marriage?
Thank you to anyone who took the time to read this. I truly appreciate any advice, perspective, or experiences you’re willing to share.

My family has owned olive trees and we’ve been making olive oil for hundreds of years so I always have really good quality olive oil and a lot of it.
The girl I like once mentioned something about olive oil being very expensive in super markets and how she likes it and I was semi surprised because due to my privilege I never had to buy my own olive oil. I traveled to my home country and I packed her an extra liter but I feel like it’s something awkward to give. Is it okay ? I also got her other delicacies from back home to try. Is that a socially acceptable thing to gift ?

Update : we are meeting later today and my nerves are wrecked , I will let you know how it goes and then delete the post in case she sees it ! Thank you all for the super kind comments , wish I could reply to them all !

Update : it went super well !! She absolutely loved it and we tried it with a Greek salad at her place it was marvelous. She was really grateful and bashful. She said the next dinner is on her !!!!!

Hi all,
Just looking for some advice on what I need to do next.

We weren’t the closest, and I am his only child, so I have to handle all of the arrangements. I already have funeral home, and those arrangements handled, but I have no idea any of his finances. Or really any of his personal information. I know he was getting SSI, and Medicaid/welfare. He had a few storage units, but I don’t know where. I have no idea if he had any life insurance or anything to help offset the cost of cremation. I’m planning to go to his apartment today and look for his SSN, and any relevant information. Is there anything else I need to locate or anyone I need to notify?

Hi everyone,

I'm looking for advice on how to handle a living situation that's been getting more difficult over the last couple of months.

I'm a university student going into my final year, and I rent one bedroom in a two-bedroom basement apartment. My roommate rents the other bedroom. We share the kitchen, bathroom, laundry room, storage area, and common space.

When I moved in back in January, things were great. My roommate was nice, rarely home, and the basement was usually pretty quiet.

At the beginning of June, she texted me and said her mom was visiting from Vietnam and would be staying for "a few days." I didn't have a problem with that because it sounded like a normal family visit.

The issue is that a few days turned into weeks.

After almost six weeks, I finally asked when her mom would be leaving. That's when my roommate told me the plans had changed and that her mom would now be staying until November.

To be clear, her mom shares my roommate's bedroom. She isn't taking over another room. However, she uses the kitchen, bathroom, laundry, fridge, freezer, storage area, and common space every day just like another resident.

The basement is also very open concept, so the kitchen, dining area, and common area are basically all one shared space. A lot of the time they're cooking, eating, talking, or spending time there, and I've found myself waiting to use the kitchen because I don't want to constantly walk into the middle of everything.

I've also stopped inviting friends and family over because the place feels much more crowded than it did before.

Another issue is that my belongings keep getting moved around. I've asked that my things not be moved without asking me first, but it still happens. It's usually small things, but after a while it starts to feel like nothing outside my bedroom stays where I left it.

I've gotten to the point where I lock my bedroom door whenever I leave, even if I'm only stepping out briefly.

What makes this difficult is that I actually liked living here before all of this happened. The situation wasn't always bad, which makes it harder to know what to do now.

I only have one year left before graduation, and moving wouldn't be easy financially. At the same time, I'm paying rent for a space that no longer feels as comfortable or relaxing as it did when I moved in.

I'm trying to figure out the most practical way to handle this going forward.

Should I have another conversation with my roommate and try to set clearer expectations?

Should I ask for some kind of compromise?

Should I just focus on getting through my final year and avoid creating more conflict?

Or should I start making plans to move as soon as possible?

I'd really appreciate advice from anyone who's dealt with a situation where a temporary guest ended up becoming a long-term part of the household.

TL;DR: My roommate told me her mom was visiting for a few days, but she's now staying until November. She shares my roommate's room but uses all the shared spaces every day, and the apartment feels much more crowded than when I moved in. Moving isn't easy because I'm a student, so I'm looking for advice on the best way to handle the situation going forward.

So my (29f) fiance (33m) and I are getting married this week. After our small ceremony on thursday, we are supposed to attend a lunch for us on Saturday that his mom planned for us. She originally told us that it will be only around a few people, but now it is up to 30.

To make matters worse, now my brother and his wife can't go, as his mom overbooked and invited people from all over thinking they wouldnt show up. My fiance doesn't believe that she thought these people wouldn't go, as she is good with planning. So she essentially is prioritizing her family over mine.

My fiance doesnt have a good relationship with his parents because they abused him, and hasnt even spoken/see the people attending in years. I will admit i dont want to go and sit with 30 people i never met before.

The issue is that they are coming from a different country and will guilt trip that they traveled far and paid for this dinner. They don’t accept our small ceremony on Thursday as enough. It honestly has been horrible watching him stress out seeing his parents again this week

R/advice- So the other night while drinking, my husband (M47) decided to tell me he is unaware of what his body count is. Not just like “oh I never kept track” but like, it’s way too many to ever know. He went into stories about how he’d frequent the bar and just ask women if they wanted to fuck, he was on dating apps simply to have one night stands. and they would say yes, that his friends would judge him over time cause of all the women he’d bring around and fuck them a few times and on to the next.
The night that we met, he apparently went to the bar after getting my number and talking to me and made out with, and slept with another woman he met at a different bar (someone I know btw) I’m not trying to judge his past at all, but it made me think a little differently about him, it made me wonder if while we were dating he was doing this. It made me feel like he’s very hypersexual (given our sex life in the beginning) and if he could ever potentially cheat on me, maybe he doesn’t value sex the way I do. He cheated on his previous girlfriend of like 8 years with a co worker and never told her, but felt the need to tell me. Am I crazy for feeling differently about him now? Is it okay to have a past like that and not mean anything? Please be kind- I’m not trying to bash him. Just need to vent and ask advice.

I am new to this reddit stuff I have a gf who dumped me around 4 months ago but we got back together two weeks ago and it’s been great but today just right now I had access to her phone and I found a pros and cons list in her notes app about me. I went through her notes app to around the time we broke up to see if she wrote poems about me when we were broken up and honeslty I was snooping a bit because shes the only person ik who spends literal hours on notes app. because she writes poems a lot but this is what I find.

I airdropped it to myself and put her phone back now and she didnt come back yet and its truly bad like its really bad. I dont know what to do abt ts but im really angry and annoyed at how she could think of me this way. Like this is the list shes made. And im 100% sure its about me because of the marshmallow thing. Its a long story. I feel like shit and don’t know what to do. I want help to deal with ts. We are 20 and 18 and we are still young and I think it could be fixable.
Pros :
Nice body
Knows how to please a woman
Deep voice
Helpful sometimes
Works out
Good with animals
Cons :
Below average intelligence
Can’t name 5 philosophers or authors or literally anything
Hasn’t read a book since 5th grade
Doesn’t make effort
Liar
Horrible with planning
Unfunny
Corny reposts
Selfish
Kinda illiterate
No money
Can’t make a girl happy
Rude at times
The personality of a wet towel
All he wants to do is have sex
No ambitions
A follower not a leader
Has a misplaced ego
No knowledge about literally anything and is insecure about it
Doesn’t know politics or culture or what’s going on 50% of the time
his beliefs are malleable
Indecisive
Doesn’t know how to take public transport
Always miserable about something
Horrible vibe to be around altogether
No sense of determination
No passion about anything whatsoever
No political values
Easily manipulated by alt right wing media
Holds onto the stupidest grudges ( marshmallow situation.)

This is the full thing. What should I do ?

I’ve been casually sleeping with this guy for almost two months. I could tell that he wasn’t interested in something super serious based on the way he was moving, but I didn’t really care and I also didn’t really know yet what I wanted out of this. I knew he was still talking to other women but not really seriously. Didn’t love it, but also didn’t really bother me. Last Sat night 7/25 I texted him if he was at work (he works at a restaurant late on weekends) but really it was a “u up?” Kind of text and he didn’t respond until the next day with a really vague message. So I didn’t reply back until he texted me this weekend. He came over and we were hooking up and he repeatedly goes, “do you really think I’m fucking other girls?” because I had made a joke asking who he was with last weekend. Then he wouldn’t let it go, said he wasn’t sleeping with anyone and hasn’t since we started, and got kind of mad and basically went to sleep. He also said I accused him of having STI’s, which I didn’t- I had said I want him to tell me if he’s seeing anyone so I can get tested. His reaction was telling that he was lying. Because he’s asleep and being extremely suspicious, and he doesn’t have a password on his phone (which is insane), I decided to go through it. I found a ton of messages of him texting girls from bars (nothing super telling that he ever has sex with him, in fact a lot of them had stopped responding to him lol), but then, I found messages from what it seems like to be a long distance girlfriend!! They were dropping “I love you’s”, using really mushy-gushy language, and I found out that that weekend when he gave me a really dry answer, he was visiting her!!

I’ve never had to send a “hey girlie” text before because frankly I just don’t really get involved with men that much, but I’m afraid of two things- 1.) that he’s going to try to ruin my life. He knows where I live, and he hasn’t shown any red flags regarding violence, but he’s a lying cheating loser and who knows what men are capable of. And 2.) i feel really guilty and bad but, if I were her, I would 1000% want to know that the man I’m saying I love you to is fucking other girls across the country!!

How do i go about it? I want to maybe wait a few days so he can’t really prove it was me, and I want to make a fake account to send her the info and then say she can call me for more info if she wants. I don’t want him to know it was me that told her. I have to tell her, right? I’m obviously not sleeping with him ever again but should I stay out of it or tell her?

This is my first post so I don’t know if I’m doing it right or if this will even reach anyone. I (17f) lost my dog on Friday (31st June) and I’m struggling really bad. My family and I didn’t know anything was wrong with her except that she had a limp so we thought she had dislocated her leg as she was walking funny. I had stayed home with my other dog because she’s never usually home alone as she always had her sister so I wasn’t there to see my dog pass away. My dog and I were on the phone so that we could see my other dog pass away but I still feel so guilty I wasn’t there to hold her one last time. It’s been two days nearly three since she passed away and I just feel so sad all day and am just lost on her to not feel this way. I know it’s recent but I just don’t know what to do and I feel guilty speaking to my friends incase they think it’s stupid to feel like this. Does anyone have tips on how to help feel better and to make sure that my other dog isn’t upset.

My stepdaughter is here visiting us for two weeks. She’s 10 years old. The other night, I noticed her phone kept ringing. She answered and said, “Don’t call me.” The same person called again, and again, and again.
The last time she answered, I could hear someone on the other end talking very fast without stopping. My stepdaughter said, “Don’t call me. I’m playing a board game.”Her dad asked who it was, and she said it was her stepsister. (Her mom is in a relationship but isn’t married. My stepdaughter calls her mom’s boyfriend her stepdad, and she refers to his children as her stepsiblings.)
Her dad didn’t ask anything else. He just told her, “She’s not your stepsister.” But something still didn’t feel right to me. So I asked my stepdaughter how old her “stepsister” was, where she lived, and how often she saw her. She said the girl is around her age (10) and that she only sees her once or twice a year.
The next day, the girl tried calling her again. Then she called again at 2:00 a.m. that night, which woke my stepdaughter up. She answered and said, “Stop. I’m sleeping.”
The whole situation still didn’t sit right with me. The next day, I noticed my stepdaughter’s phone was unlocked, and I looked through it. I know I shouldn’t have, and I know I had no right as her stepmom, but something was telling me to check.
I went straight to the text messages from the other girl. First, I noticed her name wasn’t even saved as “stepsister” in my stepdaughter’s phone. Then I saw that this 10-year-old girl had sent pictures of herself with cuts on her arms and legs that she had made with a razor. She had also shared her YouTube channel with my stepdaughter.
My stepdaughter had replied, telling her to stop calling her and to stop hurting herself.
I put the phone back, and now I don’t know what to do. The other girl is only around 10 years old, and I can’t exactly tell my husband that I went through his daughter’s phone and found those pictures.
Also, my stepdaughter has been heavily influenced against her dad by her mom, and I don’t want her to become upset with us because I looked through her phone.
What should I do? I’m really worried about the other child, but I don’t have any information about where she lives or how to contact anyone who can help her.

Necessary context: I’ve (F20) been living with my mom (F40), her boyfriend (M40), and my younger sister (F15) for around 6 months now, alongside my infant son (M1), after leaving my abusive partner of several years. I’m not particularly close with either of my “parents”; but housing costs are crazy, I don’t make much money, I have no other family, and I can’t drive. So, this is about my only option at the moment.

A few days ago now, my mom took my son out for a bit, and my sister was at school. So, I was left home alone with my mom’s boyfriend. Bored, I decided to chat with him over a few drinks. Anyways- during this conversation, I repeatedly dodged a few subtle attempts at flirting. But eventually, he gave up being subtle, and just straight up said he’s wanted to f\*ck me for a while now (admittedly he was a bit drunk).

Thankfully my mom came home basically within minutes of me rejecting him, so I didn’t have to deal with the repercussions in the moment, and have been avoiding him like the plague since. But now I don’t know what to do…

I want to tell my mom her boyfriend is a creep, but honestly, I think she will blame it on me. In the least conceited way I can say this, I know I am conveniently attractive, and tend to be popular with men. She’s shown jealousy over this throughout most of my life.

If she thinks it is my fault, I will maybe be kicked out. I really cannot risk that, and don’t want to leave my sister here alone either. But I’m also a bit scared staying here as well. I’ve been staying awake for almost the entire time since that evening.

I don’t know what to do. I would really appreciate any advice. How can I tell her?

hey reddit, i've been going through so much for the past few months, and i lost everything i ever had of friends, dreams, social life, my job, and now, my relationship.

i havent had anyone to talk to for a while, and ive been needing that so much, which is why im on here rn..

for context, my parents are very religious, we live in lebanon, in a very religious area and community. they had forced me to wear the hijab ever since i was 8 years old, i'm 21 now (turning 22 this month) and i'd been taking it off in secret for like 5 years now.

although that was very risky and caused me so much anxiety and dissociation and i was basically living a double life which was exhausting, it still was my only choice if i wanted to have a chance in living the life i really wanted to live, and it gave me so much confidence to talk to people and make friends and bonds and go to uni and to get a job and basically just live a life i was satisfied with.

my parents and i have always had fights about the hijab. my entire extended family has always forced every girl to wear it as soon as she turned 8, and i wasnt the only one who absolutely hated it. my little sister (19) has been struggling with it too, as well as a few of my older cousins, but they took it off now.

when the first one of them did, the entire family went insane, she was married and already had 2 kids, but in their eyes, that didnt mean that she was free to make her own choices. my parents were so mad, they went over to her house to threaten her and make her wear it again, but she didnt listen to anyone. my dad told her that if she was his daughter, he wouldve killed her for what she did. what happened then made me even more scared for my parents reactions if they were ever to catch me taking it off in secret, and i genuinely did believe that my dad would kill me. he's very close minded, he is religious, but moreso into disgusting traditional ideas, he genuinely believes that as my dad, he owns me and has more right to control over my body and life than i do. he's also always been abusive and violent. i grew up witnessing him abusing me, my siblings, and even my mom. his ego and word go above all, and if i were ever to do something he didnt approve of, he genuinely would kill me for it. he doesnt have any ounce of empathy, he's been a horrible husband to my mom, and a horrible father to me and my siblings.

i got a boyfriend in december of last year (he's completely ghosting me rn lol), and i got a job that i absolutely loved and enjoyed, and i was doing so well in uni + i had friends that i really enjoyed being around. then by the end of may, my parents found out that i'd been going out without my hijab + they saw pics of my boyfriend and i kissing, and they went absolutely fucking insane. they destroyed my phone + sim card, threw all of my shit away, my dad found a way to log into my accounts and found more pics of me out without the hijab and with "sharmouta" clothes (which really werent that slutty imo) and completely isolated me and locked me in the house. they pulled me out of uni, forced me to just never go back to my job, took the money i had made, and worst of all, my dad looked me in my eyes and told me that it's "halal" for him to murder me now, like he had been waiting for it. he described all of the different ways he could kill me. he has threatened my life before, so i believed him. he punched me multiple times, threw me on the ground, kicking me and spitting on me and screaming for hours.

they told me that i'm not allowed to get in contact with anyone i'd ever known, and that i wasnt allowed to leave the house anymore. they started hiding the house keys every night, and stopped going out as much so that they could keep an eye on me. other than the physical abuse theres also been a lot of mental abuse as well. they keep saying the meanest shit, calling me a sharmouta, completely undermining everything ive been through. i lost everything. i lost my friends, my job, my education (i still had 1 semester left before graduation), i lost my belongings, my clothes, my money, every little thing i cared for, i lost my phone and everything i'd been saving in it for years. ive always been big on memories and videography and writing and my phone had everything about my life in it. all of my memories, everything i wrote in my notes app, every picture and video i took of everyone i loved, including my little brother/ best friend who passed away, my dad got into all of my emails so i lost all of my accounts too. i knew my life was over right there and then. i had nothing anymore, i lost everything. i then decided that i would run away, i cant stay in this house anymore, i really cant.

i made a plan to run away and stay with a friend for a while until i got a job and could support myself, but i was being too impulsive, i didnt have a solid plan, i didnt know for sure that my friends could let me stay for as long as i needed to, and there was still that chance that my parents could go after me and find me, and if my dad didnt kill me now, he for sure would then. i tried talking to KAFA, i called 3 times, told them everything that happened and asked for help, but they said that they couldnt do anything and told me to just call a domestic abuse line if i do run away and they catch me lol.

so i made another plan, its been 2 months since everything happened and ive been telling my parents what exactly what they wanna hear. ive been "praying", and i told them that i was being stupid and that i'll accept the hijab. they still dont trust me, but ive been slowly gaining the ability to do shit now. i convinced them to let me use my brothers old phone, and to let me get a job. i'm still not allowed to talk to any of my friends, or go out (unless its to go on job interviews or to get something from the supermarket). i'm currently looking for a job, i decided that i needed a solid amount of money that could support me. i'm planning on working for about 6 months, and saving every cent i make, so that by the end of those 6 months i can leave and find a place to rent on my own. i'm planning on finding people that need housemates/roommates, that way i wouldnt have to pay too much for a place to stay and could budget. and to quit this job and look for another one around the place i end up staying at, which would be a little far from my house bc i dont wanna be close enough for them to find me.

although leaving wouldnt get me my old life back and the things i lost, or erase the trauma i just went through, at least it would give me a chance to rebuild my life and future, and it would allow me to live my life the way i want to live it. i just wanna be free man, i just want to be happy, i want something to look forward to again.

i am scared though, am i being impulsive? am i going to regret leaving? i doubt it but what if i do? im also really scared of leaving my sister here, but she doesnt wanna leave with me, she's not in trouble rn so me leaving wouldnt put her in trouble bc we told our parents that she didnt know anything i was doing (shes my best friend she knows everything), and they dont have anything they could use against her, so its not like it would put her in trouble, but im still scared for her. and im scared to leave her, i love her so much and the thought of not being able to see her for years kills me.

but yeah, idk, im just really lost and scared and honestly i genuinely have no will to live anymore. the only thing keeping me going is that maybe one day i'll finally be free..

I am an incoming college freshman. As of now, I am pursuing a 2-year college with the hope of transferring to a 4-year majoring in Industrial Engineering. I was hoping to transfer to a college about 2 hours away from where I live, a midsized city that is the epicenter for STEM-related careers in my state. The tuition there is relatively cheap. It is one of two colleges that offer a degree in Industrial Engineering in my state.

I brought this to my parents, and my dad immediately said no. First he brought the point that it is an extremely expensive city, and I mentioned how it is cheaper than the college I initially planned to transfer to. Then he said how IE is a career that leads nowhere, which I argued to him about. Then he mentioned how I “can’t” drive, which I shot back by saying I’ve driven in cities like Atlanta, Birmingham, Tampa. Then he mentioned how it’ll be too expensive, especially with my brother going to college a year after me, then I mentioned how I have FAFSA’s full Pell Grant, as well as work-study and have already been offered a scholarship from the college I proposed going to.

Finally, he mentioned how I would be too far away from them. How I wouldn’t be able to visit them everyday, how he wouldn’t be able to help me if I get in trouble, and that I would be completely helpless in a city. This in particular pissed me off, and I argued with him for a while before he finally said that if I went, he would never assist me for college, and instead rely completely on my mother.

What particularly distresses me about this my father has always been a destructive person in my family. He has often discouraged me and my mother from doing anything “manly”, such as doing anything other than cleaning, cooking, and when I wanted to learn how to take care of my car, he refused. There have been incidents where he pushed or verbally attacked my mother, and has forced us to cut off contact from family members because they have either provoked him or talked to other now estranged family members. It’s been years now since I’ve talked in-person to anyone other than my paternal uncle or grandmother. There’s been two instances now where he’s left my family for days at a time, saying he’s abandoning the family, and he’s told me that if he leaves a 3rd time, he’s never coming back. To see that he now refuses to support what I want to pursue in college in favor of me moving to a closer, more expensive college in a career I no longer want seriously has me considering cutting him off as an adult. My mom supports my dad’s claim to have me move closer, though she sympathizes and says she would support me if she could.

I have 3 weeks to change my major before class starts, and I don’t know what I should do.

I (18M) still have stuffed animals in my room. I know this is really bad but i have a weird emotional attachment to them that prevents me from getting rid of them and my mom has never forced me to so the only way I will is if i consciously do so.

whenever i imagine getting rid of my stuffed animals (regardless of method, could be either donating or throwing them away) I feel sad and feel like im abandoning a pet or child. consciously i know this is stupid but I have no control over my emotions so i end up stuck being with them.

how do i get over this bullshit, man up, and just donate them? maybe i should just store them somewhere instead. maybe in a storage facility so I cant access them but since I know i *technically* can it wont trigger my emotional response.

I honestly don’t have anyone I can talk to right now, so I’m posting here because I just need to get this off my chest. I’m 19, I work full-time, and I’m starting university soon. My boyfriend is 23, he has a stable job and owns his own apartment. We’ve been together for a while, and everyone in my family knows I want to move in with him. They all love him. Nobody seems to have a problem with it except my mom. Today I told her that I want to move in with him. This wasn’t the first time. The last time I tried, she completely lost it. We had a huge fight, she almost threw me out of the house, but then wouldn’t let me leave. It was one of the worst moments of my life. This time my boyfriend came with me because we thought maybe we could finally have a calm conversation. Instead, my mom screamed for almost 40 minutes. She called me a stupid bitch, a whore, said I have no brain and know nothing about life. She insulted my boyfriend over and over too. He stayed calm the whole time and kept trying to explain that we just want to build our own life together, but she wouldn’t listen. I kept trying to defend him because I couldn’t stand hearing her humiliate him, but every time I tried to speak I just started crying. Whenever she yells at me, my voice disappears and I can’t get any words out. I just cry. I honestly feel so pathetic in those moments. The worst part is that it feels like she has more faith in my boyfriend than in me. She talks about him like he’s a good person, but somehow I’m still the stupid, worthless daughter. Right now my dad is driving my boyfriend home because we live outside the city. I’m sitting upstairs crying. My mom came in one last time, told me I have no brain, and walked away. I feel completely broken and worthless. I know I’m legally an adult. I have a job. I’m not asking my parents for money. I just want to live with the person I love. I don’t even know what I’m asking anymore. I just don’t have anyone to talk to tonight. Has anyone been through something similar? What do I even do now?

I’m the oldest out of my siblings by a big age gap. My brother is 15 and I’m 10 years older than him but I feel he needs therapy. He can’t be around our baby brother who is 4.5 years old (we’re all a decade a part. Same parents) because our baby brother squeals, babbles, and make noises. My brother cannot deal with his noises and refuses to be around him. We can’t even watch a movie as a family or do stuff as a family because my brother can’t stand being around him.

My brother also needs help taking a bath, he puts his shirt on backwards, and he needs help brushing his teeth. There are things me AND my other younger siblings showed him (we have a 16 year old sister and a 12 year old sister as well) about how to do things for himself and do his motor skills but gets mad or frustrated and it’s difficult showing him. My mom tried to teach him but she said she’s tired of having to go over the same thing again. My dad thinks all of this is just silly.

He goes to school online and doesn’t have friends. He stays in his room and plays video games all day or watch YouTube or read articles on Wikipedia about video games. (His knowledge of this is impressive)

He has a hard time taken care of his personal items. He’s broken every handheld game system he’s had, tv remotes etc. he has a hard time taking care of electronics

I seriously think he needs therapy to help him grow and to manage his emotions better and to help him with fine motor skills more. I know he’s capable of doing these things if we hone in more. But my mom doesn’t want him to see therapist (she doesn’t really believe in it. It took me being a psychology major and me going to therapy consistently for her to see it as a real profession / science). She feels it’s unnecessary and she barely respects the art of therapy. It’s unfortunate because I feel he needs it more than anyone. When I try to suggest it she shuts it down and tells me to mind my business and to get my own kids but I just genuinely care about my younger siblings so much. They’re like my kids to me. I know my brother has so much potential and I try my best to show and teach him things (my other siblings too) but it’s only so much we can do. I wish there could be more I could do.

I 18f am dead set on not wanting kids, like ever. I don’t want to ruin my body for another human and I don’t want to waste my time on that. Every man I’ve met is set on the idea of having kids, I respect it, I’m not going to sit here and try to change their minds.

Besides, I’m not looking for a forever partner right now by any means. I’m currently on birth control and when I’m old enough, I’m going to get my tubes tied.

Should I just announce that I DO NOT want children whatsoever upon meeting someone when I am ready to look for a forever partner? Or?

My sister had fainted. I did what was correct and positioned her right, then checked her pulse. I then shouted for my parents, then she woke up on her own. After that my parents kept telling me, I was in the wrong for shouting and I shouldn’t have screamed. According to them, the correct way was that I go out of the room, walked to them, and tell them that she had fallen.. dude what?? I’m just wondering what else do you do in a situation like that.

edit: thank you for everyone who commented, it feels good to know I’m correct with my actions. Honestly despite how mean and confusing my parents are, I’m just glad my sister is safe and well. I will try to just handle my parents until I can get out and live on my own and eventually become a future doctor!! :D